How Green Becomes Wood

"That is your choice," Daizi told Xander, "and I'm not going to force you to do otherwise. But you don't have to worry about us, I'm not afraid of him trying to steal you away from us, especially not with how young he is. I mean, he has a shorter age gap with you both than you have with Ivy, I doubt he is itching to unsettle our family. I don't think anything like what we've been through can happen again."

"There is something else about him," Dark said, cautiously, wanting to tell them how it seemed like Declan hadn't even told his brother about them until recently, but guessing how hearing that may feel, "but it is related to him and may be... a bit unpleasant."
 
"The new guy isn't going to bring him back, is he?" Alec asked sitting bolt upright. "Because I don't want that! Not at all!"

Xander's eyes narrowed as he drew closer to Alec, but he waited to hear what Dark would have to say.
 
"From what Lance said, from what he understood, Tristan... his brother... is not very close with him, and does not seem to keep in touch. So I do mot believe that is his plan." Dark assured Alec, "and if he suggested it to us, we would dissuade him, do not worry. We would not allow that. What I was going to say is only that, from what it seems, he had not been... told of your existence, until recently."
 
They both had to ponder over that for a moment.

"On the one hand, that's a good thing because it means he, um, Tristan? Wasn't being a jerk and not caring," Alec offered cautiously.

"On the other hand, that just adds to the f***ery that is our bio dad," Xander said dryly.

Alec tried to come up with a response to that but could think of nothing. "Sure. That too." He looked at Dark and Daizi. "So, are you going to call him, then? And go meet him?"

"In a public, open, secure location?" Xander asked suspiciously.
 
"We're going to call him." Daizi answered with a nod, "It seems right to. I'm not going to lie there's and claim there's no small part of me what wants to lock the door and say, absolutely not, but I can't help but imagine how it'd feel if suddenly I learned I had teenage nephews, and they were living with a completely unrelated family I'd never met. I'd make myself crazy wanting to know if they were okay, and according to Lance, his main concern was that you're being taken care of, so... I want to show that you are, and that you're loved."

"I do not know if we are going to meet him in person," Dark concluded, thinking for the first time that he hopes Tristan is not one of those people who struggles understanding accents over the phone, "it depends entirely on our phone conversation with him."

"I wouldn't mind if you sat silently in on the call," Daizi said, thinking about it, "if you want to hear what he says directly."
 
"Alright," Alec agreed. "I think all of that sounds fair."

"It'd be weird to listen in, but... yeah. Let's do it," Xander nodded.

"Once Lance has had the opportunity to warn him, I guess," Alec concluded. He fell silent and looked down at the floor. "Do you think... he'll be more like Aunt Ciara or like Declan."

Xander scowled and shifted at the sound of the name. "Does it matter? He'll get what he needs, and that'll be that."
 
Daizi shrugged, "There's no real way to know until he talk to him. I hope he's more like Ciara, but all we have is his name and age. And that he lives here in town."

"That is at least one very important difference," Dark said, considering how much Declan bounced around, "it is too easy to drive ourself crazy until we meet him, which does not serve us."
 
"No, I guess it doesn't," Alec sighed.

Xander frowned. "Wait, he lives here in town? That means we might have seen him before and not even realized."

Alec got up and went to give Daizi a hug. "We'll be alright," he assured her. "We're stronger now as a family than we ever were before."
 
"That's true, you might have." Daizi agreed, hugging Alec back for as long as he needed, "and you still might, if you choose not to meet him. But there isn't anything we can do about any of that now." She smoothed Alec's hair, "At least this time we are really in control, right? Nobody is dropping in unannounced, we get to decide everything."
 
Alec took a deep breath and hugged Daizi tight for a bit. Then let go and looked between her and Dark. "I'd like to see what happens. If he's not a good guy, then we don't have to do anything with him. If he is, well, then we'll figure it out later."

Xander grunted. "I have no optimism, but alright. We'll see what happens."
 
"I would never require you to have optimism," Dark promised Xander, speaking as a famously pessimistic man, "but I do think Daizi and I have a responsibility to at least talk to him."

After thinking about it for a few moments, Daizi sat back and said, "I think we should call him about as soon as Lance tells us he's made certain Tristan knows to expect it, so we don't drive ourselves insane worrying about it. For all we know, he isn't even interested in forming a deep, enduring bond, isn't interested in making it seem like he is, and just is seeking his own closure."
 
"You're right," Alec agreed. "We maybe be overthinking this."

Xander stood and stretched. "Oh, you're all definitely overthinking it, but it's Tuesday, and you know what that means."

Alec glanced at the clock and gasped. "It means if we don't hurry, we're going to be late!" He hurried toward the stairs. "I gotta change!"

"Same, so don't hog the space!" Xander called as he bounded after him. "I can't go mucking stalls in these clothes!"
 
"You better hurry," Daizi chuckled, sitting back on the couch, but after only a few moments, Ivy's cries came over the baby monitor, so then Dark, too, went upstairs, leaving her alone on the couch. She took a breath, pushed her hair back, and then also got up, trying to do anything but think about this conversation. Somehow, she had forgotten Declan had a brother. She actually recalled brothers, plural, but now she couldn't trust that recollection, and although now she had no fears about if the twins were going to be whisked off, because at this point she doubted the courts would even allow that, despite it technically being a possibility, but she couldn't help but wonder how many relatives they might still have on their father's side.
 
The twins changed clothes quickly before running down to say goodbye to Ivy, Dark, and Daizi. Then they headed off, Alec to Cyr wheel lessons, and Xander to the horse therapy. For Alec, it was an hour of learning how to control one's body and wheel at the same time by following basic moves. They seemed simple enough, like twirling the wheel like a heavy hula hoop, until it was time to combine them together. Then it felt like doing the whole belly pat-head rub thing. He was secretly pleased that at least in this, he seemed to be on equal footing with his fellow students. He didn't mind not being a natural as long as he wasn't embarrassingly disastrous at it. It was also a great way to keep his mind off the whole uncle thing.

After class, he stood outside the building patiently waiting for Dark to pick him up and scrolling through his phone looking for a part-time job. There were a lot of fast food places hiring, but fast food intimidated him. It was so, well, fast! But it was a decent option. Maybe he could pick up a night shift when things would be quieter? Other people didn't often like working night shifts, it seemed, so perhaps that was an option. Or maybe he could find a cleaning job somewhere! Like sweeping out a mechanic's shop or folding brochures for library events or something. Actually, the library often hired summer workers. He'd look there next. He also wondered how Xander was doing at the ranch.
 
While the twins were gone, Dark and Daizi did speak much more openly regarding their thoughts about this whole... uncle, situation. Despite them both wanting to tell Cooger about it, they both refrained, at least for the moment. It was too new, and they wanted more information about it before they told anyone else. And they knew Cooger would, ultimately, feel a level of disappointment that he wasn't their only (living) Uncle anymore. There was amount of pride he took in it.

When Dark came to pick up Alec, he asked about how the lesson went, and listened carefully to his son's answer during the drive home.
 
Alec told Dark all about spinning the wheel, moving his arms to demonstrate the circular pattern he was supposed to be making with the wheel while walking with it. He'd clonked himself on the head and shoulder a couple of times, but it didn't hurt too bad. Enough to make him not want to do it again, but not too bad. He was quite proud of his progress so far, but he knew he had a long way to go. Next week, they'd be working on standing in the wheel! His teacher had encouraged them to get large, cheap hula hoops they could practice the motions with, telling them where they could find the hoops for only a couple of dollars. Being able to work with a moving hoop was foundational to the Cyr wheel, so even a cheap hula hoop would help.



Meanwhile, at the ranch, Xander was meeting the first horse they were going to try him with. "This is Judson," Pam told him as they walked over to one of the many small round pens. "He's part Thoroughbred, part something else. We aren't entirely certain, but we think maybe Hackney or similar."

"Thoroughbreds are pretty cool," Xander agreed, looking at the big, solid-looking horse. It wasn't anywhere near as massive as the draft horse he'd met before, but as far as standard-size horses went, he was a block! A tall, grey block that turned to look at him with big, patient eyes.

"We thought you'd like him," Pam grinned. "Ready to get up?"

Xander looked over the horse. He had on a saddle, but there was no bridle. A head halter with a rope kept him in one spot, but there were no reins for him to guide the horse. "Uh, isn't he missing something?"

Pam shook her head. "That comes later. Don't worry. We're just going to sit today. I know you've said you've already ridden before, but we like to start at the basics. Plenty of people say they can do things but overestimate what they can actually do, so even though we trust you know what you're doing, this is standard."

"Alright," Xander said slowly. "Feel's a bit like I'm a kid on a pony ride, but I guess it makes sense."

"You go ahead and head in there and just pet him before you mount up," Pam said, leading the way to the gate.
 
Dark promised Alec to take him to get a hula hoop as soon as they could, although it was a bit late in the day to run out just then. "Would it surprise you to learn I am not bad at hula hooping? We only learned because Daizi was showing off at a party, and I was pressured into giving it a try by Cooger, and then I had to watch his spirt collapse as he realized he was not making a fool of me that time."
 
Alec laughed and shook his head. "You are full of surprises! I cannot wait to see you hooping the hula!"



Xander went up to the horse and greeted him. Judson willingly snuffled his hand and looked him over, but he wasn't overly affectionate. He stood still as a stone as Xander mounted up and got settled into the saddle. The horse shifted once to adjust and then flicked his ear back, watching and waiting.

"Very good, nice balance and posture," Pam praised. She went up to Judson's head and stroked his nose. "Okay, now we're going to try untying him and letting him walk free."

Xander's hands instantly went from resting on his thighs to grabbing the saddle pommel. "Wait, you're going to put on a bridle or something first, right?"

Pam shook her head. She didn't move to untie Judson yet, explaining first. "You have great balance, and you clearly know how to sit on a saddle. Judson is as safe as any horse can be, so I'm going to untie him and just let him walk on his own. Only if you are comfortable with that. If you don't want to, we can stop here, but I would encourage you to give it a try. Free walking is a great way to get to know the horse, and for the horse to get to know you. Again, we don't have to. If you want, you can get down, or we can just stand here for a while."

"So, bridles aren't an option?" Xander asked warily.

"Not right now, no," Pam said.

He looked down at the horse. Then peeled his hands off the pommel and sat up properly. "Alright. Let's do it."

Pam untied the lead and then took the halter off Judson entirely.

"Wait," Xander squawked, tensing as Judson casually walked away, "I thought you were just going to untie him!"

Pam walked along side them, keeping pace with Judson but clearly not controlling him. "We can stop at any time, I promise, I'm sorry you didn't realize the halter was coming off. What about the halter coming off scares you?"

"I'm not scared," Xander protested nervously, one hand going to the pommel despite his best efforts. "I'm just... I'm thinking about what happens if something spooks him?"

"Do you think the halter would keep him from spooking?" Pam asked, moving to stand by the fence.

Judson turned and wandered away from her, but the pen wasn't very large. He only had a few steps to go before he was turning back toward her.

"No, but you should be able to control him!" Xander growled out. He tried to relax, but every move Judson made caused him to tense up again. The horse plodded on patiently, his stride never changing. "He's a big horse! Bad things can happen!"

"Bad things can happen because he's a horse, or bad things can happen because a person isn't in control?" Pa asked.

Xander's brain scrambled as he tried to figure out what to do. There were no reins! No control! He needed control! How else was this supposed to work? "I want off!" he blurted before his mind could comprehend.

"Judson," Pam called and gave a little whistle.

Judson turned and went straight to her before stopping. Xander barely waited for Judson to stop before he was sliding off. He gripped the side of the saddle, shaking. He closed his eyes, flushing in embarrassment.

Pam came to stand beside him and patted Judson. "Very little of life is in our control, Xander," she said gently. "Even when we think we're in control, most of the time, that's an illusion, like a halter on a horse that weighs close to seven of you. Sometimes, bad things do happen, whether we're in control or not, but sometimes letting go of that idea of control can open us up to a whole new freedom and joy in life."

"Sounds like horse sh**," Xander mumbled, still not looking at her.

"Maybe it is," Pam said agreeably. "In any case, I think we'll stop here for today. If you have it in you, the stalls in barn three need cleaning, but if you need to, you can head home."

Xander pushed away and headed for the gate. "I'll clean. See you in a couple of days."

He didn't say much to his fellow horse barn cleaners as he mucked out the stalls. His mind replayed that feeling of being on Judson without any control over and over again. An illusion of control. Maybe she was right about that. Maybe he really never had had any control, but that didn't mean he shouldn't try. He needed to keep control to keep himself and his brother safe, didn't he? But no matter how much he tried to control, he couldn't stop things like random uncles popping up out of the woodwork.
 
"I am a better dancer than I get credit for," He said, although it was unclear if he was teasing enough, "I certainly had the skills necessary to spin a hoop around. It really is not so hard, I do not think." He glanced over at Alec, "I know it is hard to imagine such things."
 
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