How Green Becomes Wood

"Oh. That's a lot. I'm glad my family isn't that big. It sounds overwhelming." He paused for a few moments, and then, with furrowed brows, changed his mind, "Actually, no. I think. If you have a big family like that, there are too many people to keep track of, so. Then, um, hide in the back of the room, and they'll be so busy with everyone else... In a small family, they're going to make you talk, because there aren't enough distractions. You know?"

He shook his head, and after a moment said, "If... if you want me there, I'll go. You're my friend, you know? I, I don't like strangers, or crowds, but... I like... being able to support people I care about. You'd show up for me, I bet." He swallowed, looking down at his camera and fiddling with it.
 
Xander studied him a moment before telling him the time and the place. "You can come and go as you want. Nothing saying you have to stay the whole time if you don't want to," he assured him. "Be cool to see you there, but it's okay if you can't. It's cool." He turned to start walking away and then paused to say almost as an after thought, "Oh, we won't be here tomorrow, either."
 
"Okay..." Milo replied, nodding, "Cool. Um. I'll be there. I will."

He stood awkwardly as Xander began to walk away, wondering if maybe he was supposed to say no? And if maybe Xander was angry at him? This conversation felt weird. Like he was doing something wrong. But he couldn't... figure it out. "Oh. Okay. Is it, uh, because of the adoption?"
 
Last edited:
"No, it's..." Xander took a deep breath and blew it out, not looking at Milo. Alec stood close to him but let him do the talking. "It's the second anniversary of our mum's death," he finally said. "This year's a bit harder than last, and... stuff, you know? Just going to take some time tomorrow."
 
"Oh. S**t." Milo replied, true understanding coming into his face. "That's really hard. I still... I start feeling sick, you know, like, physically ill, and I wonder, why am I sick? And then I look at the calendar, and it's the week my dad died, and that's why I was sick. It sucks. Those anniversaries suck. I stay home, too."
 
"Yeah, they really do," Xander agreed with a little nod. He stuck his hands in his pockets and stared at the ground for a moment. Then he shook himself and glanced at Milo. "So, yeah. Probably see you on Thursday, I think, got a test that day anyway, and definitely see you on Friday for the party." He scuffed his shoe. "Feels weird trying to do the two things in one week."
 
He sniffed, "Yeah. Bet it would be. Sorry it fell like that." After waiting for a few minutes, he said, "Do you know what I've been doing lately? I started throwing ice cubes against the shower wall. They break, and it feels good, but afterwards, I don't have to feel bad about breaking things, and I don't have to clean them up, because when they melt, they go down the drain. Do people ask what they can do to help a lot? I always get really annoyed because. I don't know. Never knew. Then I feel bad for feeling annoyed."
 
"Ice cubes? Never thought of trying that. Sounds like a good idea," Xander admitted. He considered a moment and shook his head. "Not really, no. Sometimes. When it happens, I get annoyed, too, 'cause I don't have the first clue what anyone can do, but mostly they just... keep their distance. Most of them are too uncomfortable to try to do anything. The whole school knew what happened when it happened, but maybe like five people actually knew who we were. The teachers are the most annoying 'cause they give you the most sad, pitying looks."
 
"Yeah... That's one good thing about moving... no one really learns about that stuff. When my dad was sick, I got all those looks. Even though I was just a kid it made me mad. I don't think they realized all they were doing was reminding me. People don't know how to... deal with other people grieving." Milo replied, much more settled now that he knew what was going on.
 
"It's maddening, but I guess it makes sense. I don't know how to deal with myself," Xander grumbled. "Still don't like it. Hate it. It's all just... f**ked up. Inside and out." He shook himself. "Class is going to start soon. We should get moving."
 
Xander started walking. Then, almost impulsively, he reached out and gave Milo a single shoulder pat. He didn't say anything, but, weirdly, he felt better. It was good to hear someone else just agree that, yeah, it was what it was, but they didn't have to like it. Then he took Alec's arm and gently pulled him along.

Alec gave Milo a little smile and followed along behind Xander.
 
Class started and went well. Of course, there was a lot of "sad eyes" going on, and some of the students who knew what was up gawked curiously, but they were more or less easy to ignore. Xander shoved aside his feelings for now and focused on schoolwork. It kind of helped.

Alec was trying, he really was, but right now he felt like his emotions were at war with each other. He was so excited about the adoption proceedings!! And then he'd remember what tomorrow was. And then he'd remember Friday. And then tomorrow. And then Friday. He was so tired of feeling like a ping-pong ball!! He just had to get through today. Then tomorrow, he could sit with one, singular emotion and let it play out. One at a time!

School finally ended, and the twins quickly packed up everything. They had tried to get the next days homework from every teacher, and some gave it to them while others waved it off and said "you don't need to worry about that." Alec politely thanked them for their consideration while Xander seethed. Shouldn't it be up to him to decide? Then he tried to shake it off. They were just trying to help. That was all. That was better than coldly ignoring everything, right?

Finally free, they followed the stream of students into the halls and toward the exit door.
 
Last edited:
Anytime she heard a student mention either of the twins, Sloan took it upon herself to tell them to shut up about it. It wasn't their business, it was two years ago, and it was creepy they were so interested in something that literally doesn't affect them. She wasn't harsh about it like some of her friends might've been, and since she held some sway as someone who was both generally well liked and senior class president, the people she talked to generally recognized they probably weren't being helpful and apologized. And it was quiet enough she hoped it wouldn't get back to either twin that she was doing it.

In the parking lot, she went up to them both with her hands in her pockets, "Hey."
 
Alec turned to her first and smiled. "Hey," he greeted her. "Um. How was your day?" Over Sloan's shoulder in the distance, he spotted Emma coming toward them slowly.

Xander turned as well and greeted Sloan with a nod.
 
"It was alright, I don't think anything really of note happened." She replied easily, "I'm not seeing you tomorrow?" They hadn't told her they'd be staying home, but she could guess. If they told her otherwise, she'd do her best not to, but would probably end up fussing at them.
 
"Uh, no, no, you won't," Alec said, a little surprised by Sloan's guess, but it seemed right that she guess it. "We'll be staying home tomorrow." He glanced at Xander and gave him a little nudge.

Xander cleared his throat. "We'll be seeing you on Friday, right?" He and Alec had texted and asked everyone, but it was good to follow up.
 
"That's a good idea. And yeah, I'll definitely see you Friday. Wouldn't miss it." She flashed a smile at them before asking, "Is it a sort of... gift-giving event? I don't know what you give someone for something like that."
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top