How Green Becomes Wood

Ivy tried to grab at the picture of Daizi like she would for her picture books, grumbling in irritation when it was kept from her. She was able to hold all other books, and that was Mama! She wanted to get to hold it.
 
"Ivy!" Alec said in shock. "What is this? This is not you." He turned and carried her out of the closet and back toward the living room. "Those are not Ivy's books. It's okay to be upset, but screaming because you don't get your way is not okay. Come on. Let's go look at books that are yours. I don't want you to hurt these books on accident."

Xander looked over the books and realized he had two books backward chronologically. He pulled them out to swap them, and then, almost instinctively and without thought, he glanced into one, flipping the pages quickly.
 
Ivy swiveled around in his arms, acting very much like this was the worst thing to ever happen to a baby like her. When Alec tried to give her one of her books, she absolutely refused to hold it.

The book Xander had picked up was from last year. He wouldn't have known it, having not gone through all of them, but it would have been unlikely to surprise Xander that all of the sketchbooks from 2013 onwards featured Daizi prominently. The 2028 sketchbook did not deviate from this. In the early pages of the book, she seemed playful and focused, like she ever was, but then traces of anxiety and fear creeped in around her eyes. Once, he captured her sitting on the bathroom floor, with her head tipped slightly back and a few strands of hair fallen loosely into her face. Throughout the pages, her belly grew, but for every sketch of her showing affection to Ivy before her birth were many more of her simply living her life. Wearing the ridiculous horse shirt, apparently yelling at Dark when she was struggling to get up off the bed, playing with Enkidu, cooking dinner, napping, and throughout all of them, even when she seemed stressed, anxious, or upset, she looked beautiful, like all of the light in the world emanated from within her. Anyone would look at the drawings and recognize it was Daizi, it looked just like her, but nobody could look at them and say any of the unkind things Daizi had been told all her life about how she looked. In all of these drawings, she moved with strength and grace (except, maybe, the one where she was unable to get off the couch without help, that one was a bit less graceful). Dark had done her justice in the fall of every lock of hair, in how the fabric draped across her body, in how the light hit her. In one, she was nursing, sketched at an angle where Ivy's head blocked most of what his teenage son might find distressing--nothing he wouldn't have seen when she wore a v-neck shirt. It was tender, Dark's illustration of the two of them. Dressed simply, and recently post-partum, Daizi nonetheless seemed regal, her long hair clipped up and she had one slender finger rubbing against her then-newborn baby's shoulder.

Many pages had multiple sketches on one, many had one which filled the page. Most were done only in graphite, but a few had been painted. Many near the end of the book had been: just looking at the painting he had done of Daizi holding Ivy after she was born, presumably based off the golden hour they spent just the three of them before telling anyone else in the world their baby had arrived, said all that could be said about what that moment meant to him. He hadn't omitted the sweat or exhaustion from his wife's face, but so many stronger, overwhelming and conflicting emotions were there, too. Similarly, he had painted when Cooger first held her and when the twins first met her.

And speaking of the twins: both Alec and Xander filled as many pages as Daizi, and far more than Ivy (not only because Ivy was around for a much smaller portion of the year, but because also he had much less time to draw. It was a wonder he had managed to do what he had throughout the months of October through December). Two pages were filled just of trying to capture their first talent show performance. Then there was when he had taken Xander horseback riding, and when he built those models with Alec. He caught Daizi teaching Alec to play the piano and Xander teaching himself leatherworking, he caught them goofing off and sitting silently in the same room together. There were so many little moments, like Xander's glares juxtaposed with Alec's grins. They were drawn together, they were drawn separately, with Cooger, with Daizi, with Enkidu. There were one or two of Peter, Sloan, Alec, and Xander in the lunch room. There was the time Alec, Daizi, and Xander were all sleeping together in his bed.

The carnival, when they watched movies together. All of it featured. Cooger maybe a bit less, because Dark had to remain so focused on his household that year, but there were still moments from when the two of them managed to find some time together. Some of his coworkers graced the pages, too. The art teacher, the music teacher, Milo's music teacher (although Milo, of course, did not appear, as he had not yet moved to the state yet).

Still, seemingly randomly throughout these moments of triumphs and peaceful normalcy, were the strange and upsetting drawings. Some of these, too, were painted. There were fires, living people's faces peeled away to reveal their skulls. They fought to keep their organs inside their bodies. There were never visible actions. People were never drawn being hurt. They just... were, and terribly so, in ways where it didn't make sense they still lived.

Sometimes, it was just a random image stuck amongst the others. Sometimes there was a mix of both. Sometimes there were pages and pages without any of these weirder ones.

Never once did Dark draw himself.
 
Last edited:
Alec tried a couple more things until he realized that Ivy was, basically, throwing a tantrum about the fact that she couldn't have the book she wanted. Her screams were starting to hurt his ears and frazzle his nerves since he wasn't used to them. So, he sat her down on the floor and placed a couple of toys and books right in front of her and then moved away a few feet. He stayed where she could see him and sat on the floor but turned his back to her as his ears and his heart ached. He wanted to give her something in part because he wanted her to be happy and in part because he just wanted her to stop screaming, but that would not ultimately be good for her. He closed his eyes, breathed deeply a few times, and started reading one of Ivy's books, trying to exude calm. Calm for himself, calm for Ivy.

Xander stared at the pictures for a long time, absorbing what he saw. Then, abruptly, he clapped the book closed and shoved it back on the shelf. "F**k therapy," he muttered, thinking of the horrifying images. But there was also beauty in the other pictures. He just couldn't understand what he saw, seeing them side by side. How could drawing and thinking of such horrifying things in detail exist beside such... calm and beauty? He felt like he should understand. He felt like it was right there on the edge of his brain, but he couldn't fully process it. Not yet. Maybe once he'd sat with the thought for a while.
 
She watched as he walked away from her and sat down with his back towards her. At first it only upset her more, but then she watched as he kept his back away. That was something new, nobody had done that before. Her anger at not being able to look at the picture of her mama was replaced by something new, and she crawled worriedly up to Alec and pulled at the back of his shirt, murmuring at him to try to get him to look at her again.
 
Alec instantly turned toward her and smiled. "Hello. Do your want to read with me?" He scooted around a little and offered her his lap whether or not she wanted to read a book.

Xander walked in, still frowning in thought, and plunked down near them. "What's with all the screaming?"

"Nothing that can't be fixed with a hug," Alec told him. "What took you so long?"

"Nothing. What are we reading?"
 
Ivy gurgled softly and crawled into his lap, snuggling in close against his torso. Any further distress was quickly forgotten as she got ready to hear the story, while safe and warm. It was nice, and she was tired after all her screaming.
 
Alec moved so his back was supported against the couch and started reading. When he finished, Xander picked up the next book and held it so Ivy could see it before he started reading. He was very serious in his ready, but comically so.
 
Ivy still tried to hold the books, or at the very least help turn the pages, and occasionally tried to babble as though she were reading the words. Sometimes, she stopped the twins from turning the page from one she really liked until she was ready to look at another one. By the time Xander had finished his book, she was barely still awake, with her cheek pressed hard enough against Alec's shirt to leave wrinkle imprints on her face.
 
Alec read Ivy one more book, taking his time and keeping his voice low and gentle. Then, with Xander leading the way, they carried her upstairs to her room. Alec laid Ivy in her crib and stood rubbing her back and shoulders tenderly. Xander stood back, watching, feeling a little weird, but there in case Alec needed him.
 
Ivy was already asleep by the time she was placed in her crib and went down without much of a fuss. It had been a really hard morning, and she had used a lot of her energy in crying, so she slept solidly, only stirring slightly when Alec inevitably pulled his hand away before settling back down.
 
"Right then," Alec said after they'd tiptoed out and closed the door. "Food, snacks, and movies?"

"Sounds good," Xander agreed.

Before they did that, they took a few minutes to take the treats they'd picked out for their parents and hide them around the house. Xander took one of the skittle packs and hid it in the shed while Alec put a small pack of peanut butter cups in Daizi's office. They stuck a couple more in other spots where their parents would find them but Enkidu wouldn't. Then they got themselves nestled in on the couch with the baby moniter nearby and watched a movie while petting Enkidu.
 
Enkidu was very happy to join them on the couch. Finally, with nobody else around, this was his time! A little while after the end of the movie, Ivy's little gurgles and babbles came over the baby monitor. She had fussed a little bit, but despite not going back to sleep, soothed herself enough that she was just chatting to herself. Or to a ghost of some sort. It was never clear with babies.
 
Alec gave her a minute to see if she would go back to sleep, and when she didn't, he got up and went to fetch her while Xander stayed petting Enkidu. When Alec walked into the nursery, he was thinking about sitting with Ivy next to Enkidu so she could see him and pet him if she wanted before they moved on to the next part of their day. Time for food! Real food and not just snacks. But first, he had to actually fetch his sister.
 
Last edited:
When Alec went to get Ivy from her crib, she was standing up and holding tightly to the crib railing to support herself. When she saw her brother, she grinned brightly at him, only looking mildly confused about this new perspective.
 
Ivy's new position didn't register with Alec at first. He smiled at her. "Hi, Ivy! Have a good..." He hesitated, staring. "Wait, Ivy, are you standing all on your own? Did you pull yourself up?"
 
"You adorable silly thing! You can't eat everything in sight!" Alec laughed. He reached in and lifted her up, holding her over his head. "You can stand! We are all going to be in so much trouble!" He pulled her in for a hug. "So much trouble!"
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top