How Green Becomes Wood

"Alright," Dark replied, and didn't push it any further, not yet, but he knew he needed to, once he found a better opening into the conversation, "I think I would not fit into one of these cars," He glanced up at Alec with a slight gleam in his eyes, apparently proud of his joke, "but, a correctly size one, sure, I suppose I would. I am not really a 'car' person, I have never really understood the appeal. I like my car, but I know nothing about it. I used to have a motorcycle though, I was actually planning on getting a new one this summer, but now it just seems impractical."

He was about to have three kids (he swallowed, having not previously thought of it in that exact phrasing, it made him seem... very old), and he wasn't comfortable bringing any of them with him on a motorcycle. The baby for obvious reasons, but even with the teenagers it was too much pressure.

"Since you are fifteen, next year you will be able to get your driver's license. I suppose I should take you and Xander to get a permit so you can start working towards it," He suggested, although the thought of them driving his car was also a bit stressful, but as much as he was willing to help them where he could, buying them even a used car just to learn on seemed extreme.
 
Alec giggled at his joke. "Nor would I!" He started trying to see how the pieces would fit together before gluing. The outside was easy. The inside had so many tiny details! And this wasn't even close to the most detailed of the model options. "I kind of like the look of some cars, but more like a, 'oh, that's nice' sort of way, I suppose. Motorcycles are terrifying beasts!"

He picked up the instructions and looked them over. "Do we paint the pieces first before we glue them together? Yes, it looks like that is what you should do for the smaller bits and the interior."

He shuddered at the idea of driving. "I do not look forward to driving, not at all! Xander says he is looking forward to it."
 
"I definitely think painting them first would be easier, and then we would not have to worry about getting paint where it does not belong," Dark reached for his paintbrushes and suggested painting the little pieces first, so they had time to dry before being assembled, and then said, "Well, driving is scary, when you first begin to learn. There is a lot of pressure, because of what mistakes could mean..."

He paused, remembering what had happened to Alec's mother, and then took a breath and said, "but I think if it is something you are able to do, it is a good skill to have. Daizi cannot learn to drive--obviously--which means she always needs to have someone to drive her around. She fundamentally unable to visit somewhere alone if it does not have a working public transportation system. When we took our trip down to Point Pleasant, we stopped in this little Bed and Breakfast in a small town, and they did not have a taxi system, or even really any rideshare services, but it was still an American town, so it was mostly stroads and difficult to navigate as a pedestrian. If she was there on her own?" Dark shook his head. There were so many instances where people like his wife were made helpless because of basic things like infrastructure, and it made him angry every time he thought about it, "If you can drive, that will never be an issue."
 
Alec looked over the pieces silently. He picked out all of the small pieces that needed the same color and started preparing to paint them. "I suppose... I suppose I could try," he agreed softly. "I think it is not me driving that scares me. It's everyone else. There are so many teenagers driving, and teenagers are scary and easily distractable! I think I would rather be in the safety of a nice, big bus. I think. But it would be nice to be helpful like that."
 
"Teenagers are scary," Dark replied, intentionally teasing Alec, "but I do think, having worked with teenagers for... most of your life, the majority seem to be more responsible than we give them credit for, and the majority of drivers on the road are not teenagers." He reached over and lightly squeezed Alec's shoulder, then he chose his own pieces needing the same colour and began to work on them.

"And you are generally a careful person, so I am sure you will do just fine on the road," He added.
 
Alec shot Dark a quick smile and focused on his pieces. "Our song for the show is coming along well," he said. "The hardest part is Xander's guitar solo. The difficulty level jumps from a three to an eight! It's a short solo, but the artist really made it count. Other than that, we just need to practice our consistency and memorizing the lines. Did you ever do a talent show?"
 
"I am glad to hear it. I wish you all had more time to practice, auditions are soon, I believe," He replied, genuinely curious about what song they would end up singing. It was probably be the first time he was excited to sit through the talent show, "but I am sure you will all sound incredible. And me? No, I never did a talent show. I do not really like putting myself out there, like that. When we were in high school, Daizi did, though, it was beautiful."
 
"She did?" Alec looked up from trying to paint the inside panel of the car door. "What did she do for the talent show? I don't think she ever mentioned it before."

He looked down and realized he'd started to paint his thumb. He quickly set everything down and wiped off the silvery paint. He had no interest in going to school with one silver thumb. He doubted anyone would notice, but it would distract him and be so unbalanced!
 
"She played the harp. For awhile she wanted to be a classical musician, but changed her mind. She has the hands for it, I do not know if you have noticed, or if you would have, but she has such long, delicate fingers..." He smiled slightly, and then hoped it wouldn't be perceived as weird he was talking about her hands like that. It didn't seem weird to him, for two decades he had watched her play instruments and braid her hair and make her elegant hand gestures while she spoke, so it was impossible for him to not have developed an affinity for them.

Once more he looked over at him, and hoped perhaps now was a good time to approach the real conversation he needed to have, and asked, again, casually, "Do you like her?"
 
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"She does have very nice hands. They suit her style and dark goddess style very well," Alec agreed, finally getting the paint off his thumb. He picked up his car piece and started working again. He stopped to look at Dark in surprise at his question.

"Do I like her? Of course!" he said readily. "She is a very kind soul, a unique individual, a gentle heart, a humorous personality, and, I know she doesn't like this adjective, but I think she is pretty in her own way." He looked down at his work. "You know, in a dark goddess way. All the descriptions of them aren't how perfectly shaped they are or anything. They are described as terrifyingly beautiful. A scary being who is also hypnotizing to look at. I've gotten used to it, but I did feel hypnotized when I first saw her." He blushed and looked at Dark quickly. "Not like how you see her, of course, sir! Like if I was looking at a classic painting." He looked down again. "Her kindness just makes all of that glow. The prettiest person in the world can look so incredibly ugly when they are unkind, and she is... yes, I think she is possibly the kindest person I know. That would make her pretty even if she was objectively ugly to my eyes."
 
Dark nodded, and smiled hearing the kind things Alec said about his wife, and said, "I feel similarly about her. The first time we ever spoke, I felt like I had come home at last, and at that time, I never knew what it was like to feel at home. Even so young, she had that quality about her, we did not even know who we were yet, but she ran up to me, yelling in Arabic, because she heard me humming an old song she knew, and it was the first time in months she had heard her own language, and I was not frightened or anything, I just felt more calm than I ever had in my entire life. When we parted that day, all I wanted was to speak to her again, but I was not nervous I would not get the chance." He sighed, and for a few moments only looked out the window.

But then he turned back to his work, and picking up his paintbrush, continued to paint the miniature car parts. They were not exactly sized for his hands, but he was doing alright, "I am asking, though, because I have noticed how sometimes it seems you try to avoid her, on a few occasions I have watched you refuse to even look at her for very long, and how often you leave the room she is in... and she has noticed, too. If you think so highly of her, then... I do not understand why."
 
Alec kept his eyes on his work, but the brush in his hands shook a little. "Really? I don't think I realized that," he said, his voice a hair tighter than usual. "It wouldn't be because I dislike her, of course not! I do quite like her." He closed his mouth before he could babble and tried to focus exclusively on his work. He needed to change the subject! He didn't think he'd be forced to face this. He didn't want to talk about it. But why was his brain going blank now that he needed it the most?
 
"I think you should tell her that," Dark suggested in a low voice, "because she feels awful. She would never say it, because she wants to give you the space to feel however it is you are feeling, but she does." He didn't want to be too specific, because he wasn't trying to guilt Alec into anything, but he worried the twin hadn't realized how what he was doing hurt her.

"And if there is something else going on, you are able to talk to either of us, do you understand that?"
 
"I suppose I could say something to her, yes," Alec agreed cautiously. "I have never had to tell someone I didn't dislike them before. It is an unusual event." He swallowed hard, his hand still shaking a little as he kept trying to paint. "Of course. I know. You and Daizi have been very kind and generous to us, sir. We both appreciate it." Normally, he would glance up at Dark and smile, but this time his heart still pounded and he was trying to hide the trembling in his hand. He tried to never lie, but in this instance, he feared the truth would hurt far worse than lying. He didn't want to hurt their feelings or make them upset.
 
"She thinks you dislike her, or that you are disgusted by her," Dark told him, even though he knew it would be hard for him to hear. His tone wasn't accusatory, but he was serious.

He reached over and put his hand over the teen's trembling one, "Alec. It is okay."
 
Alec froze, the end of the paintbrush jittering in tiny circles under Dark's hand. He finally dropped it and st the model down, pulling away from Dark for the first time. He didn't go far, just sat up straight and clenched his hands tightly in his lap, his eyes on the tabletop. "I am n-not disgusted," he said, stuttering just a little. "Not really. No, it's just. It's just. I have... things to do. And I have to do them, right? And I remember suddenly at times.

The words rang false in his own ears, and he dared not look up at Dark. Would Dark be upset if he heard the lie? At least Dark had never punished them, at least not like others had, but had he pushed too far? Would Dark be harsher? He just didn't know how he could tell the truth. He hated the truth! He didn't want to feel the way he felt! It was easier to pretend like it wasn't the truth.
 
Dark rested his crossed arms on the table and sighed heavily, "I promise whatever it is, it is not as bad as you may think it is. But if you do not talk about it, there is nothing we can do to help."

He did not look away from Alec, but remained entirely calm. All of the tools lay still, and Dark did not bother to tidy them as they rested.
 
Alec gripped his thighs tightly, digging his fingers into his jeans. "I... I don't want it," he rasped out, tensing as he said the words. He closed his eyes and waited for Dark's anger. Waiting for the rage. For the hands. For this, he deserved it.
 
"I'm sorry," Alec said softly, his voice trembling slightly. He still didn't look at Dark, his heart pounding as he anticipated what was to come. The slow build to the explosion. How could Dark react otherwise? Alec had just told him he didn't want something Dark wanted more than anything!
 
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