How Green Becomes Wood

"She's learning people she knows really well are different with her than the people she doesn't know well," Daizi said, rubbing Ivy's back, "It's okay, Hummingbird! Milo is a friend! Can you say hi?" She helped Ivy to wave her hand, and Milo waved back, trying his best to follow whatever Daizi was trying to do. Eventually, while they waited for Alec, Daizi suggested Milo roll a ball to her, and gradually Ivy began to warm up, although she remained relatively hesitant.
 
Alec finally marched downstairs and announced, "I am wearing two socks that match, I have all the rest of my clothing, I have everything I need in my pockets, and I have my phone in my hand. Can we please leave before something decides to spontaneously disappear off my person?"

Xander snickered. "Give us just a minute. The mini is playing with Stitch. Just hold still and nothing should vanish."

"I think you underestimate the curse of vanishing that has been placed upon my person," Alec grumbled, but he held still.
 
"She is really cute," Milo said, rolling the ball back to Ivy, who hadn't quite figured out how to push it back yet, but she did pick it up and show it to Daizi every time, who would then congratulate her and push it back. It was a simple game, but one that seemed to be working. At the very least, Ivy wasn't shying away against her mother anymore, and she was actually looking at Milo.

"I think if you wait until she is finished here, you'll end up missing your practice," Daizi advised them as sagely as she could manage, "Milo can come over to play another day."
 
"There you go. You have a standing invitation to come babysit," Xander told Milo.

Alec grinned and told Ivy, "Bye, Ivy! We'll be back! Maybe not Milo, I don't know if he'll be coming back, but Xander and I will be back! And bye, Mama! Bye, Baba!" he called to the house in general since he wasn't in the room.

Xander rolled his eyes and headed for the door. "See ya later. Let's get going."
 
"Say bye-bye, Ivy!" Daizi said, kissing Ivy's cheek as Milo stood up, "You all have fun."

Milo murmured a goodbye to Daizi and Ivy and followed his friends to the door to put on his shoes and pick up his bass again. Just before the door closed, when Ivy recognized her brothers were going away again, she promptly burst into tears.
 
"Aw, Ivy! Don't worry. We'll be back!" Alec called back his promise.

Xander waved to Ivy. "We'll be back. Play with Enkidu, yeah?" He headed out, tossing his keys lightly. "Come on. The longer we delay, the longer she'll be upset. And Peter will be waiting."

"Oh, right," Alec said, still sad.

Xander opened the door to the van for Milo. "Are your grands picking you up from practice, or do you need a ride home?"
 
Daizi rocked Ivy, "Sweet Ivy-Qadira, they'll come home! You don't have to worry, habibti. You don't, I know, you love your brothers very much."

Outside, as he put his bass into Xander's van he said, "Well, I don't really know how long we're going to go to, you know? So, I guess it depends, because I don't want my grandparents driving when it's too late out, you know? But also I don't want you driving when it's too late out."
 
"I'll make sure we finish up early enough that it's not late and give you a ride home," Xander said patiently.

Once they were in the van, Alec turned to talk to Milo while Xander drove. "I'm really looking forward to jamming with you! It's going to be epic!"
 
"Just don't blame me if I sound better in your head," Milo replied anxiously, rubbing the back of his neck. He couldn't remember the last time he actually played with people, and he didn't want them to feel like he had wasted their time.
 
"Milo," Alec chuckled, "I have absolutely no preconceived ideas beyond the fact that you can probably hold your instrument upright. Beyond that, I only expect to have fun!"

"We'll be there in just a few minutes," Xander reported, watching the roads.
 
"People keep saying that to me," Milo replied, "I'm not sure I believe it. It just sounds like the sort of thing people are supposed to say. I mean, if I go in there, and the bass is out of tune, and I can only play two chords, are you really going to feel the same as you would if I could play lile Getty Lee?"
 
"If your bass is out of tune, we'll sit around and help you tune it," Xander replied reasonably. "If you can play like Getty Lee, I'd be calling the talent shows. After I looked up who the hell Getty Lee is."

Alec chuckled and looked at Milo. "What other people think is none of your business, Milo," he said gently. "It doesn't matter. All that matters is how you feel about yourself and how you feel when playing." He paused and added, "Well, if you're interested in dating someone, then I suppose it matters what they think, but still not as much as what you think about yourself. But despite all that and for what it's worth, I'm not just saying that. I mean it. And I have no reason to lie to you, do I?"
 
Milo turned his head and looked at Alec, looking almost annoyed, "I do not believe you never care what your friends think. It's great to say all that all that matters is how you feel when you're alone, but if you're with each other people, you have a responsibility to support them musically. Not just as their guidance counselor," He looked out the window at they approached the building, "If you woke up tomorrow and found yourself tone deaf, everybody would be nice to you, and you'd probably still enjoy it, but I bet it'd bother you that you couldn't harmonize, and everyone knew it."
 
After a long pause, Alec remarked, "That's the most I've ever heard you say. And certainly the harshest you've ever been."

"I told you he could hold his own when he wanted to," Xander said mildly.

"I wouldn't say that I never care about what they think. That'd make me a narcissist or a psychopath, but I don't care about it like that, and I wouldn't surround myself with friends that wouldn't accept me for my awesome self. I'm not everyone's cup of tea or coffee, and that's okay! But I have no idea what you mean by being a guidance counselor. However it is, though, none of us are going to judge you or be too bothered if you are completely tone deaf or play your bass upside down. That is a solid fact for me, and I think I know my brother and friend well enough to think they'd agree with me," Alec told him.

Xander pulled up to the building and put the van in park. "Dramatic speeches aside, if you suck, I'll tell you so."
 
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"I don't think it's harsh," Milo replied, rubbing his eyes underneath his glasses, "It's just that, being told, 'dont worry, it doesn't matter what people think, just be yourself,' but it's not realistic, it's not like I've not been told that a thousand times, and it--it's not that I don't appreciate the effort--but it's not actually helpful, because it just makes me overthink about how I'm overthinking." He exhaled sharply, not knowing how else to explain that he already knows Peter, Xander, and Alec form a pretty good band, and he hasn't really played with other people, but because they play with other pretty good musicians, they may be expecting more from him than he can provide, but even though they keep saying it doesn't matter, because they just want to have fun, if he sucks, then they won't have fun, and it doesn't matter how much they say they won't be bothered, if he sucks, they wouldn't have the same fun they'd have if he was good, because they'd all either need to babysit him or pretend like he was better than he was to try to preserve his feelings, and that would suck for everyone.

He didn't doubt that they'd be nice about it, he didn't expect them to turn around and be mean, but it'd still be lame and embarrassing for him and either they were being dishonest to him or dishonest to themselves to pretend it really, truly did not matter even a little bit how he did, telling him to not care and just have fun made him feel like his brain was going to melt, because how was he supposed to not care if he was playing well when playing with other musicians? It was possible to accept someone for who they are while also being disappointed!
 
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Xander started to get out of the car, but Alec stayed. Quizzical, Xander waited with his door partially open.

Alec unbuckled and turned around so he could face Milo as straight on as one could while sitting in a car. "I'm sorry," he apologized. "It wasn't my intent to tell you how to feel. You can feel however you want, and that's totally valid. I intended to try to make you feel better and to say there was no pressure, but I see that I've basically done the exact opposite. That's not what I meant, and I am sorry that's how it happened. I just want you to know that I, myself, have no expectations and hope you have fun. If you don't have fun, that's okay. You're not going to ruin it for us. I promise. I know, I say that, and maybe this is making you overthink, too, but this is what friends do: if something's not fun for one or more of us, then we can pivot to try to find something that is fun for all of us. So, it's okay if you have the best time of your life, and it's okay if you aren't having any fun at all. Just be honest with how you feel, just like you are now, and I promise to be honest right back and try not to be overbearingly positive all the time. Deal?" He smiled and held out a hand.
 
"Yeah," Milo mumbled, slouching back down and tugging at the ends of the long sleeves he still wore even though it was July. He didn't seem quite as irritated and willing to speak up as he had just moments ago, and he guessed he didn't really know where it had come from. He just, needed to say it, he guessed. He looked quickly over at Alec, "Sure, deal." He limply shook Alec's hand before rubbing his own arm and mumbling, "Thanks." He sniffed, and as he got out of the car he mumbled, "You don't have to try and fix me."
 
"Why would I? Alec asked, sounding genuinely surprised as he got out with Milo. "There's nothing to fix. I'm the one who has to read the room better." He trotted to the back of the van. "You have mine, right?" he called to Xander.

Xander pulled the two guitar cases out of the back of the van. "Lucky you, yes, I have yours," he said, handing Alec his case. "Aren't you on keyboard today?"

"I like to keep my options open," Alec replied, stroking the case.

Xander let Alec pull ahead and glanced at Milo. "You okay there, Stitch?" he asked quietly.
 
He shrugged, picking up his case, "Yeah, I'm fine. I just--people always expect me to... I'm not..." He exhaled, "People don't get it, most of the time. Even people who think they do get it. Bobby McFerrin's advice doesn't work in real life."
 
"It does for some, or at least looks like it does, but it sure would be nice if it did," Xander remarked. "Be real nice if it did. But if you want out, just tell me your grandma texted you about something."

Alec watched them curiously by the door until Xander reached him. "Come on! Peter's already here and waiting!"

"I'm coming, I'm coming," Xander groused. "We're not all energizer bunnies, you know." He opened the door and led the way through the hallway of doors to the soundproofed room that they rented out for practice sessions. The owner was an older woman, and she seemed to "forget" to ask them for their rent a lot. She was somehow related to the owner of the pizza parlour, though the twins had never quite figured out how.

Peter sat on his drum throne idly tapping on his phone, and he looked up with a grin as they entered. "Finally! I was beginning to think you lot had gotten lost. Hey, Milo!"
 
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