How Green Becomes Wood

"Sometimes..." Dark said slowly, "It is not what is said, but how it is said. When you are carrying something difficult, and something you know people may not really be able to understand, or something you know will upset people if you tell it to them, it does not matter what the response is, because you are fully aware speaking openly about how you feel is going to make people uncomfortable, even if it is a good uncomfortable. And, if you have a friend who is generally upbeat and positive, it can be difficult to engage with, because it reminds you of how unhappy you are. Watching your struggles bring the happiest people in your life down, for some people, feels like infecting them, but trying to grasp even a fraction of their energy seems impossible, and only makes you feel more broken."

Exhaling slowly, he rubbed his thumb against the back of his hand and continued, "It is not the positive person's fault, but it can be a difficult comparison to make and live with."

Daizi reached over and held her husband's hand, "I don't know if it's helpful or productive to discuss the motivations or feelings of someone who isn't here, because without Milo telling us, there's no way for us to do anything more than make guesses. But Dark's right when he said the things people say do not always come across they way they intend them to. Not everybody is helped by the same things."
 
"So you've mentioned," Alec muttered tiredly at Daizi's last comment. He slumped back into the loveseat with a hefty sigh. "I did what I did, I said what I said, and what happened happened. I then apologized to Milo both in text and in person. I still don't think he fully heard me, but whatever the case, he said he would start to forgive me if I agreed that the subject of his mother is forbidden because he doesn't want people talking bad about her. Which I never did, but I agreed to his terms."

"You did too," Xander growled.

Alec glared at him. "I restated the truth exactly as Milo told it to us. He even said he knows I never fully bad-mouthed her. Nothing more, nothing less, but like you said, he needs his lies. I agreed to let him have them and not to interfere. Why isn't that good enough for you? Why do YOU want me punished more? Why do you want me to live in hell?"
 
"It bears repeating." Daizi said stoutly, "If you feel someone is refusing to listen to your message, they may just not be ready to hear it, and believe me, I know how difficult that is, but there are some things you can't beat into people. We need to wait until they're ready. Those are the things we need to live with."

Both adults shifted their attention to Xander, waiting for his response to Alec's question, because neither of them knew how to rephrase it more succinctly.
 
It took Xander a while to finally answer. "You get off to easy," he finally said.

Alec stared at him. "What? Seriously, what??"

"Don't pretend like you don't!" Xander snapped at him. "You get to say sorry and skip work and Bam! All better!"

"You think that's it? You think it's all better? You seriously think there's nothing more to go through or think about or constantly wish never happened?" Alec demanded, starting to lose clarity as his anger rose again. "You think I'm Fine now? That everything's fine?" He rose slightly out of his chair. "What planet did you come from?"
 
Alec gritted his teeth but slowly sat down. He crossed his arms, waiting.

Xander shrugged. "Maybe. And I don't get over it as easy when I'm not."

"What does that even mean?" Alec demanded. "I haven't gotten over anything! You've just added to it!"
 
"How do you feel you are punished worse?" Daizi asked, wanting to use this moment to better herself as a parent, "because I don't want to treat you unfairly in comparison to your brother, and I'm sorry if I have been."
 
"I get focused on a lot more, I get scolded and talked at more, and just... more," Xander mumbled, not looking at them.

"Maybe because it takes so much more to drag everything out of you!" Alec pointed out.
 
"I'm sorry I made you feel that way, Xander. I wish you had told me you felt that way sooner." Daizi replied with a gentle sigh, "And I'm sorry I tried didn't listen when you were telling me you didn't want to talk, earlier. I was afraid of... Well... I suppose of what ended up happening tonight."

"I am sorry as well," Dark added, choosing not to mention Xander also got into more trouble, on average.
 
"I'm just... tired of being the one in trouble, and when I am, I'm sorry. He just gets to move on," Xander said, still not looking at them.

"I don't just get to move on! I didn't move on from this! If you had been paying three seconds of attention, you could have seen that!" Alec protested. "I was hurting! I still am! And then you just.... YOU!"
 
"What can we do to help make it better for you?" Dark asked, not liking the idea of having treated one of his children worse than the other.

"For either of you?" Daizi asked, feeling all at once overwhelmed but doing her best to hide it, "Because... I really think we need to work to fix this, and I would be glad to schedule another family therapy session."
 
"I don't know," Xander mumbled.

Alec sighed and leaned over to lightly grip his head. "I just want my brother back! I don't think I deserved to lose him over this. Why is me doing it so much worse than you?"

Xander didn't answer at first. Finally, he said, "because you don't do that. You don't do that. And it..." He trailed off, unable to finish.
 
"Scared," Xander mumbled. "Didn't want to see you like that. Didn't want to... let it happen to anyone. What you did. And didn't know how to... how to deal. You don't do things like that."
 
"Unfortunately..." Dark said softly, "Everyone has their limit. That is why it is important to tall things through before we hit it. Otherwise..." He gestured vaguely. "How do you feel now?"
 
"Awful in general qnd still upset," Xander said bluntly.

Alec didn't say anything, still folded in on himself and feeling overwhelmed. And hurting. And saddened. And confused. He didn't understand.
 
Alec just shook his head without looking at Dark. He was scary? Him? He could understand the situation being scary, but his actual self was scary to someone who would take on literally any opponent? How? What was wrong with him that he couldn't understand?
 
"Okay." Dark replied, with a tiredness which came from his soul rather than his body, "I do not expect we will get any further tonight." He glanced towards the window, "This morning. Will you two start hitting each other again if left unattended?"
 
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