How Green Becomes Wood

Alec shook his head. "I won't be able to go down to him. He's going down there because he doesn't want to e around me. Why would he let me into his room? He thinks I hate him. He thinks I don't care! I don't know what to do without him."
 
"I tried! I really did! But it just... I didn't mean to, but..." Alec waved his hands vaguely. "There was never enough space. I just couldn't keep it all together. I promise I tried! I just needed more space, and it was hard to stay on my side without any real markings. It's just more space, and he didn't use his side for anything at all!"
 
"Well, Alec," Dark said cautiously, "If you do not have the space for everything you own, maybe you own too much. What matters more to you? It is not a question of can you have any belongings or your brother, it is a question of can you have all of your belongings and still share a room with your brother?"
 
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"I don't like that question. It's a stupid question. It's not fair to ask that. I just need a better storage system, that's all. It'll be fine if I can just move things. Maybe stack bettor," Alec muttered almost feverishly, not even fully talking to Dark any longer.
 
"Alec." Dark said seriously, "You cannot have both. How would you feel if Xander expected you to live in a room where you were forbidden from any colour, any sequins, and any decorations on the wall? How do you think he feels being expected to live in a space which does not make room for him?"
 
Alec drew away from Dark, the panic reviving, but itnwas a different fear. "You want to get rid of my things? You can't! It's mine! My stuff! It's not trash! Even if it was, it's my trash! You can't!"
 
"I did not say I wanted to get rid of it," Dark said calmly, "I am saying your brother deserves to have a space where he feels comfortable, and if he does not feel comfortable surrounded by your belongings, which migrate and take over his part of the room, you need to either accommodate his needs or learn to accept he wants to have his own room. You are more than welcome to your belongings, but that does not mean other people need to adore them as you do."
 
"No, I can't!" Alec gasped, now caught in an echo chamber between losing his things or losing his brother to another room. Both sounded like horrifying prospects that filled him with fear. He couldn't do this! It wasn't fair! Why did he have to choose?

Meanwhile, Xander finished packing up his things. He didn't have a lot, so most of it fit all in one large tote with some extra bitson top. He took a few extra minutes since Alec was still downstairs to work out what he would most likely need when and arrange his stuff with least needed on the bottom and most needed on top. He could not pack his giant plush snake, his horse replica, or his cacti. His cacti he decided to move to his shed. They wouldn't like a basement room, anyway. His snake and his horse... he hesitated and finally chose to leave the curled on his bed and the horse on its shelf. Someday he'd reclaim them. Probably. Everything else, he would put in a corner of the basement to wait until his own room was ready. His heart fluttered at the idea of his own space. A quiet space that wasn't work, wasn't shared, wasn't anything but his to rest in! He didn't care how small it was, that sounded like paradise! A tiny bit of guilt niggled at him that he was so excited to leave, but he tamped it down. He meant what he said. If Alec could figure out how to share space again, then he'd consider moving back. Until then, he needed away for his own mental sake. He grabbed the tote and started lugging it downstairs, careful not to displace the stuff resting on top of the lid.
 
"Alec, listen to me," Dark said, gently placing both of his hands on Alec's shoulders, "You told me you do not like it when I talk philosophically with you, you said that is not helpful for you. So I will be concise: when your needs and desires are disrespecting another person's boundaries and hurting them, the only thing you can do is compromise or allow them the space they need to take care of themselves. It is difficult and it is painful but it is the truth. That is what loving someone means."
 
"But. But." Alec looked from one side to the other as if literally looking at his belongings on one side and his brother on the other. "I can't! I can't choose! I can't! I need them!"

Xander tried not to draw attention to himself as he got the basement door open and carried his things down. He found an unused (but of course, clean) spot to leave his things. Then he sat on the weight bench to catch his breath and just sit. This was actually going a hair better than he'd fear... but still way worse than he'd hoped. The question was: now what?
 
"Don't call me that!" Alec cried out, pulling away and scrambling to his feet. "That's not me! I'm not smart or wise or intelligent or any of that! I can't do any of it right! None of it! And I can't! Do this! Thing! I can't!" He bolted, running away from Dark and up into his room. The door slammed behind him unintentionally, making him jump as much as anyone. He stared at Xander's side of the room. He'd always thought it was empty, but, no. Now this was empty. Only a toy snake, a toy horse, and two cacti remained. Alec sat on Xander's bed and hugged himself, whimpering quietly as he fought against the gaping, hungry darkness that shredded him from inside out. It was all gone.
 
In his already raw state, the sound of the slamming door made Dark's blood freeze. Then he forced himself to take a deep breath, reminding himself he knew exactly what that sound was, and he was safe. Shaking his head, he stepped outside in the cold late November air without his coat or shoes, just to feel the chill so it would shock him back into himself. He watched clouds of vapor form as he took deep breaths and then he went back inside and headed downstairs to check on Xander.
 
Xander looked up when he heard Dark's footsteps. For a tiny fraction of a second, he thought - he hoped - it was someone else. Seeing who it really was brought a strange sense of disappointment. "Oh. Hey. I was just about to come up," he said, standing. "Things got worse, didn't they? Didn't mean for it to be this bad."
 
"It is not your fault." Dark replied, holding up one hand, "I just wanted to come down here and see about where the new walls need to be. By the window, certainly, so you still have some natural light."
 
"That'd be cool, but it's okay if I don't get a window," Xander assured him. "Lights are just fine, like lamps or those little round ones that you can stick wherever you want. I just need enough space to park my body at night and store some clothes and books. We could do one of those beds that are built on top of drawers or something to save space."
 
"I will talk to Cooger about it," Dark replied, looking around the basement, "Luckily because I knew my gym was going in here, there is a bathroom with a shower, so that will save you some trouble."
 
"That is handy," Xander admitted. "It's a pretty sweet space to have a room down here." He hesitated, shifting his weight. "Is Alec... okay?" he finally asked. "He's taking it even harder than I thought."
 
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