"You can call me Daizi," She promised the therapist while lightly squeezing Dark's forearm, "And I suppose I feel similarly to him."
When she said this, she said it honestly, but after the words got out, she hesitated, realizing all at once it wasn't as honest as she thought it was. "I worry a lot. I worry about them. I worry about her. I worry about him. I worry about how they are with her. I worry about how they are with each other. I worry about how they are with me, or, I guess, how I am with them."
She swallowed, running her fingernails lightly along her arm, not scratching herself like Milo did, but giving herself some gentle sensation to focus on without coming anywhere near to hurting herself, "There's what Dark said, about their fight the first week of school. It was probably, at the time, the biggest argument I'd heard them get into, at least the biggest in awhile. I went outside to talk to Xander, and Dark went upstairs to talk to Alec. And that day, that frustration, that's when I first noticed there was something between the two of them. But it wasn't, the first time we had problems. We've been having problems since this began. Not problems in a way which raises the question of 'is this working,' but, except for Ivy, all of us come from difficult histories, and when you take four people from difficult histories and put them together, there's going to be problems. I have my own therapist, and so does Dark, and so do both of them, but," She waved one hand, "The twins have had their entire lives turned upside down, and we have, too, so there's problems. And curveballs. Because of course there are. And I worry, because like Dark, I don't want to hurt them further. I want to be the mother they need. And I worry about letting them down. I worry about relying on them more than I should. And I can't say it's easy, it's never been easy."
Daizi paused for a long while, figuring out what she needed to say and how she needed to say it, "The reason I wanted to do family therapy wasn't only because I wanted them to be able to speak to each other, but when we were talking with them on Saturday night, Xander said he feels like we don't treat him like we treat Alec, that we talk at him more, and I don't want that, for him. For either of them. And I don't want to treat him that way. And I don't want him to feel that way. But I worry about him, and I sometimes think I worry for him more than..." She exhaled, failing in the last moment to say what it was she hoped to express, out of fear for how it would hurt.