How Green Becomes Wood

"Khalas, khalas," Dark said brusquely. Enough, enough. "You do not need to go around thanking me. Okay? I do not feel unappreciated by you. I never have. You," He put his hand on Alec's shoulder, squeezing it firmly, "are enough and you are doing enough. Okay? The rest we can deal with." He got out of the car and went around to Alec's side, waiting for him, "Can we agree if you just want to talk without me advising you at all you will tell me? I promise if you do I will bite my tongue."
 
"I promise," Alec said, and he meant it. He leaned forward and wrapped Dark in a big hug, holding on tight for a moment before letting go. He smiled up at his father. "You also set the bar ridiculously high for fatherhood, too. If I ever have kids, I might just drop them off at your house for a few hours every day to get some proper fathering in."
 
"I promise too," Dark replied and when Alec squeezed him into a hug, he gave it just a moment before squeezing back just enough to slightly lift Alec off the ground, trying to demonstrate he had changed for his sons, not just for his wife and daughter. Then, as they went inside, he said, "I hope by the time you have children, if you do, you will have learned enough from me I can trust you to do the fathering so I can sit back and enjoy the grandfathering."
 
Alec giggled when Dark picked him up and shook his head as he followed Dark inside. "Alright, alright! I won't pawn off my fathering onto you. I suppose that's fair." He kicked off his shoes and touched the salt. "We're home! Mama? Ivy? We're home!"

Xander came downstairs and walked up to Alec with a scowl. "I don't get a hello?"

Alec grinned at him. "Xander! We're home!"

"You little sass nugget," Xander growled. He picked up Alec and tossed him over his shoulder. "I'm taking you out to my shed so we can have a talk about manners."

Alec broke out laughing and wheezing. "Sorry! Sorry!"
 
For a brief moment, Dark hesitated in the doorway, but then steeled his nerve. This was his own home. He took off his shoes, touched the salt, pet his dog, and stepped further into the house, shaking his head at the twins' antics. It was nice, though, after his disagreement with Alec in the car to see him laughing like that.

"We're in the living room," Daizi called, laughing just because of the sound of the her sons in a minor kerfuffle and Saladin, now sitting in a chair because he was too old to sit on the floor all afternoon, watched it in mild concern.

"Well," He said, without derision in his tone, "It certainly is a lively home."

"It's been quite a change, Baba."

"Yes, I can see."

Following after them and crouching down to scoop up his baby, Dark asked, "Where is Amty Zeinab?"

"Upstairs getting dressed, she, Fadia, Aya, and Eman are going to the movies tonight, 'to experience the real Hollywood movie experience.'" Daizi explained, "Why?"

"Because Alec also did not say hello to her."

"Yeah, if she wasn't upstairs, he definitely would've gotten the slipper."
 
"Hear that?" Xander scolded Alec, carrying him into the living room. "You leave out a lot of people."

"I called out to the most important ones that I knew with some level of certainty would be in the house," Alec wheezed. "Turn me around!"

Xander turned around so his back was to his mother and grandfather.

"Hello, Grandfather Saladin. Have you had a nice visit?" Alec asked politely. "I need to go change, and then perhaps we could talk more."

"Is that my cue to carry you upstairs?" Xander asked.

"You're the one that picked me up," Alec told him. "Onward! To the bathroom first, let's not interrupt Amity."

Xander carried him upstairs so he could wash up and then change once Amity Zeinab was finished with their toom. Then they came downstairs where Alec greeted Ivy enthusiastically before sitting and making polite conversation with his grandfather, trying to keep the attention on him and Ivy and away from Xander and Dark. Xander hadn't said anything, but Alec could tell the vibes were off between them. He didn't mind. Saladin was someone new to talk to. He could always talk.

Xander wandered off after a bit to go get his stuff ready for the school day. He kept himself busy and mostly away until dinner time.
 
Saladin was more than happy to talk with Alec. Although he was certainly stiff and a bit awkward, he was nonetheless nice and interested when they spoke, laughing at his own horrible jokes and playing genially with Ivy. Daizi relaxed considerably: There was her husband, sitting peaceful and quiet on the couch, occasionally contributing a sentence to the conversation. There was her father and son, chatting amicably with each other. When Amty Zeinab came downstairs, she sat with Dark, who spoke to her in quiet, respectful terms. Everything seemed okay, normal, domestic.

All settled, Daizi went to the kitchen to cook dinner for the first time since her aunt arrived, but it seemed better to keep Zeinab in the room rather than herself, because her father tended to behave better with her there, and Dark worked too hard the day before to have to cook today. So, Daizi quickly brought down a tea set while they waited and began dinner, feeling very traditional but hopeful. Maybe they'd actually make this work. The overarching peace was enough to make her hum to herself while she cooked.

When it was ready, the table was set as nicely as she could manage and she took her seat while Zeinab was chatting about how excited she was to go to the American movie theatre and how she was going to get the big popcorn bucket.
 
Alec was as excited as Amity Zeinab for her popcorn and movie experience. He reminded her to turn her phone off or at least down during the movie and assured her that movie theater popcorn did taste different. He had only gone a couple of times as theaters tended to be expensive, but he was glad he'd gotten the experience. He hoped Zeinab had a lot of fun.

Xander helped Daizi in the kitchen, appearing beside her when he heard movement around the food. He snagged tiny tastes here and there for "quality control" but did actually help. He was less jovial than the others but still contributed to conversations with Daizi and relaxed mostly.
 
Zeinab promised to do so and said she'd have to try non-movie popcorn while in the United States so she could compare it both to the theater popcorn and to what she was used to in Egypt. Who knew, maybe there were vast differences between what was sold in different continents.


Of course Daizi was glad for Xander's help and neither she nor Dark expected Xander to be particularly peppy. It wasn't like Dark could ever be described as jovial, after all. After what seemed like a largely peaceful dinner, they all moved to the living room for tea, coffee, and kahk, which were a specific type of Egyptian cookie.
 
"I can't believe break is over," Alec sighed. "It doesn't seem long enough! Now it's just poof! Gone. Back to school tomorrow."

Xander grunted in agreement. "It's been a pretty busy week. A good one, but busy, so it all went super fast."
 
By then, Zeinab had already left for the movies, and Saladin nodded to the twins, "It is good you were allowed a break, but many people in the world do not get the opportunity you have. It is very fortunate." He looked to Dark, "That means you are returning to work tomorrow also, yes?"

At this question, both Dark and Daizi froze uncomfortably. It was clear from Saladin's tone he wasn't asking the question to catch Dark in a trap but out of genuine curiosity, which made it so much worse. Here was her father making an actual attempt at making conversation with her father, but...

"Oh, no, Baba, remember, I told you," Daizi said cautiously. She should've known her father had taken this news too well on the phone, "Dark quit his job, he decided to be a stay at home father, to take care of Ivy-Qadira."

Saladin turned slowly, his expression changing as he looked up at his daughter, "He did what?"

"Baba, we talked about this. Dark and I didn't want to put her into daycare, so he agreed to stay home with her." She explained patiently, forcing herself to stay seated while pressing her hands together as though she were begging him to be patient. Only a few days ago she had warned him to keep his thoughts to himself, and she desperately, desperately hoped he would stay true to their agreement. Beside her, Dark sat perfectly still with Ivy in his lap.

Saladin turned to glare at Dark, "You are forcing my daughter to work so you can lay around all day?"

"No, Baba," Daizi said, forcing herself to sound sweet and calm, "Dark isn't forcing me to work, I want to work. I like working--"

"So, what? You are just going to sit here getting fat while spending the money my daughter earns? That is it?" He turned back to his daughter and spoke over whatever response Dark was about to make, "I told you, Daizi, I told you the entire time: he was just going to take advantage of you, and now you have given him the freedom to be as lazy as he likes."

"Taking care of a baby is hard work, Baba--"

"Hard work! He should be providing, Daizi, you make too many excuses--"

"It is hard work, Baba!" She paused, and taking a controlled breath, clenched her jaw and then said bluntly, "You would know that if you had ever done it."

"I raised two children."

Noting the increase in her heartrate, Daizi contemplated if she wanted to do this or not but before reaching a decision, sitting cold and proud, told her father, "No, Mama raised Omar, and you hired a woman to raise me. You have raised nobody."

His face colouring, Saladin leaned forwards towards her, his anger at this accusation much plainer on his face than it was on hers. It seemed she had learned a thing or two over the course of her decade of marriage, "I needed help, you do not understand--"

"I understand needing help! Believe me, I understand it! You had just lost Mama, and I was born with problems you didn't expect, but you didn't get help!" She held tightly to the couch to keep from standing, her voice straining to remain calm. "You hired someone else to do it for you, and when that became too difficult, you shipped me away."

"Spider..." Dark murmured, but when she shrugged his hand off of her back he turned sharply to Alec and handed Ivy to him without a word, nodding for the three of them to leave the room.
 
Both twins froze and stiffened when Saladin's tone grew ugly. They stared at him, Xander's unreadable, Alec's like a deer in the headlights. With each sentence lobbed by him or Ivy, Alec flinched and drew down within himself. Xander grew tenser and leaned a hair forward, wanting desperately to tell this old man to shove it, but he couldn't. The words caught in his throat, likely for the best. He wanted so badly to speak!

Then Ivy landed in Alec's arms. Alec looked at her, a little stunned and not understanding what he was supposed to do with her. Xander took the wordless command and stood, grasping Alec's arm and pulling him up gently. Instead of going upstairs where they might still hear some of it or out back, Xander chose to lead his siblings to the front door. They got on their shoes in hurried silence, Alec wrapped Ivy in her coat, Xander clipped a lead on Enkidu, and they stepped outside.

Xander pulled out his phone once they were safely out the door and texted Sloan. Last minute, sorry. Can come over? If she said yes, they would retreat there. If no, then they would walk in circles around the block until it was safe to return.

Alec held Ivy close, trembling but trying desperately not to scare her. "We're going out for a walk with Enkidu! Isn't that fun?"
 
"That is uncalled for, Daizi."

"What is uncalled for is how my entire childhood you treated me like someone to be ashamed of." Daizi replied immediately, the coolness of her expression hiding the way her heart was beating up in her throat, "You kept me locked quietly away so you would not have to deal with me, you would not have to look at me, you wouldn't have to care about me, you wouldn't have to love me."

"I always cared about you, Daizi, and I always loved you." Saladin argued.

"No you didn't, Baba!" She yelled, finally giving into her urge to stand, "I was a problem for you to fix, and when that didn't work, I was a problem for you to hide. But Baba, he--" She pointed at her husband who stood beside her more cautiously, his gaze shifting between the pair of them, "--He never treated me like that. Never once. He loves me. He's happy to be seen with me. Baba, he thinks I'm beautiful, he's not ashamed of me. Dark was always proud--is always proud of me, and of what I do, and of what I want do. Allah knows you never were."

Like his daughter, Saladin stood, eye level with her, but despite the anger plain on his face, he kept his voice controlled, "Do not be ridiculous, Daizi, of course I was proud of you."

"No you were not." She seethed, hating the way he continued to pretend he was a kind and loving father to her, and hating the way she let him get so deeply under her skin. But god, all she wanted was for him to mean the things he claimed, all she wanted was for him to mean it when he claimed he loved her. When her father told her he was proud, she wanted desperately to be able to believe him, but she hated how she couldn't, "No, you were never proud of me. You wanted me to be quietly married off to a boring, wealthy man, and live a boring wealthy life, and never have to think about me again. You never supported any of my dreams outside of viewing them as some fleeting fantasy to appease and hoped I'd soon forget, pack up my things, and move into the gilded cage you purchased for me. But Dark, my husband, the father of my children--father of your grandchildren? Of Ivy-Qadira? Do you know why he is staying home, instead of me? Because he supports my dreams, because he wants to see me flourish. Because he loves me. You have been so concerned about if he is going to hurt me, you never stopped to recognize it. And you've never stopped to recognize how much you've continuously hurt me, or maybe--Maybe you have, and that's what makes you hate him so much. Because it kills you to see someone actually care about me. It kills you to know there is somebody who could possibly love me for who I am, and not for who you want me to me. I'm never going to be the girl you hoped for. I can't be. My body isn't made that way, and there is nothing anyone can do about it. But I am the woman who I want to be, and I'm married to the man who loves me as I am. And that's something you have never been strong enough to do."

Saladin looked her up and down, his eyes growing cold. "You are so emotional."

~~

In Alec's arms, Ivy looked around in confusion, not quite understanding what was happening, but just old enough to recognize people were upset and not knowing how to react to it, so she held tightly to Alec while she tried to decide if she wanted to cry or not. Sloan had only just made it home from her gym when the text came through. A bit tired from her own day, she almost said as much but then paused and looked at the text more closely. From Xander especially, that was not a message to push aside, so she replied, Sure, I just got home. Now, yeah?
 
yAeh now sorry. over in sec. Xander paused and made sure Alec and Ivy were safe before texting Dark two words. At Sloan's. He didn't text Daizi in case her phone read the message out loud. Then, holding tight to Enkidu's leash, he guided Alec and Ivy across the road to Sloan's house. He glanced at Enkidu. He hadn't thought about a dog in Sloan's house. Her mom would probably throw a fit. Maybe they'd let him stay in the yard at least? He would deal with that in a minute. He walked up to the door and knocked. Alec hung close behind him, talking soothingly to Ivy, focusing on only her.
 
"What?"

"You don't even realize it, Daizi." He shot back, disgusted, "You always let your emotions cloud your judgment. You don't think, you never have. You just rush out, seeking whatever makes you feel best without stopping to consider how it affects others. It is a constant, unyielding flaw of yours: you always let your emotions get in the way."

"Saladin--" Dark spoke up, trying to defend his wife as he had many times throughout this conversation, but like every other instance, he was spoken over.

Hurt replaced the anger in Daizi's voice, "You only think that because you have convinced yourself hate, and fear, and anger aren't emotions."

"No, Daizi. I think that because everything in your life has been about what makes you happy. Because that is the only thing to matter to you. You run off with a shameful man because he makes you happy, leaving myself with a bill and embarrassing everyone in your life. You say he is the love of your life so it is all worth it. Daizi, you are not the one who has to pick up the pieces. You never have been. I am. While you are busy fulfilling your every whim, I am cleaning up all of your messes." Saladin growled, laying it out exactly as he saw it.

"It was over a decade ago, Baba!" Daizi yelled again, "Why can't you just be finished punishing me for that?!"

"Because that was not the only time your briefest desires have hurt the rest of us!" Saladin yelled back at her, "Because you are selfish and emotional and treat me like I am a monster for just trying to look after you! All I have ever wanted to do is protect you. I am only trying to protect you!"

"I haven't needed your protection since I was a child, and you never protected me then. Where were you when your relatives called me ugly? Where were you when I was alone and scared? When have you ever actually protected me?"

"You so desperately want me to feel shame. You are so convinced you know better and so attached to your own suffering. I am glad I do not have to know what your mother would say."

Dark came near to not controlling his own volume as once again he attempted to intervene, "Saladin."

At his side, Daizi's breath and shoulders trembled as she inhaled, and she did the best she could to keep her voice steady while she pointed towards the front hall, "Saladin. Get out of my house."

"Yes?" He replied, turning to look at her, "I paid for this house."

Both Dark and Daizi fell silent. Dark's jaw was clenched so tightly it was a wonder his teeth didn't break, but Daizi's mouth hung open as though she had been slapped. Nearly she wished she had been, it would have hurt less. Fighting back the tears that sprung to her wide eyes was impossible and her chest squeezed, little more than a small child who had broken an impossible and ever-changing rule. Even blind, she felt her father's gaze boring down into her, waiting to hear what she said next, how she'd try to challenge him now. Without a word, Daizi turned and fled up the stairs to her study, not quite running and not quite shambling, but like torn fabric being blown through the trees, letting the door slam behind her.

~~

It didn't take long before Sloan got to the door. The way the message came through practically made her run there, and when she opened it, still in her gym sweats, to see three of them and the dog her eyes widened, struggling for a few moments to know what exactly to say, "Shit."
 
"Sums it up," Xander agreed, his expression clouded as he tried to force down the anger and the thread of fear. "Can we come in?" He nodded toward Enkidu. "He can wait in the backyard if your mom doesn't want him in the house."

Alec didn't look at Sloan as he held tight to Ivy, mumbling to her softly.
 
Only Saladin watched her go. Dark stared daggers into his father-in-law as he fought to keep his breathing steady. "Saladin."

"What?" He turned to look at the man who corrupted his daughter without bothering to hide his disdain.

"Are you proud of yourself?" Dark nearly growled, keeping his arms firmly planted at his sides.

Saladin scoffed, folding his arms across his chest, "I do not need a man of your ilk criticizing me. I know exactly the kind of man you are even if you have managed to deceive everyone else."

"With all due respect," With great restraint, Dark prevented himself from taking a step closer, "of the two of us, I am not the one most in need of criticism."

"Yes, Dark. Continue to pretend you are somehow noble, continue to pretend you are not the one who taught my daughter to be defiant and convinced her to be so comfortable living like this."

"Like what, Saladin?" Dark asked, his voice dripping with contempt.

"You needn't make me say it, kelb."

"Be careful what you call me, Saladin. If I am a dog, your daughter beds dogs and your granddaughter is a mutt. In my estimation, neither sink so low, but perhaps you think less highly of them."

~~

"Yeah, come on," Sloan replied, stepping to the side, trying to process, "Just, promise me: You didn't run away, right? And, uh, yeah, we can put him in the yard, my mom will flip." She stepped back letting them inside and shutting the door before calling out, "Mom, Alec and Xander and Ivy are over, they brought their dog, do you want me to put him in the yard?"

Blair raised her head in whatever room she was in, "What on earth are you talking about?" When she came around the corner she did a double take, "Sloan, what's going on?"
 
"No, we didn't run away," Xander promised her. He led the dog out to the backyard, telling him to be good and that they'd get him soon. "Sorry, Mrs. Applebaum. Didn't mean to crash your evening," Xander said, dragging up his politest tone regardless of the circumstances. "There some... problems." He pressed his lips tightly together for a minute, looking away as he tried to find a way to answer. "Family troubles. With the visiting extended family. We're waiting for them to sort themselves out."

"They will, won't they?" Alec asked softly. "He's not going to get his way? He's not going to break up the family, is he?"

Xander snorted with more bravedo than he felt. "Hell no. Ba'd never let a guy like that win. We'll be fine."
 
Staring at Dark in disgust, Saladin asked "How could you say such a repulsive thing?"

"I merely pointed out what you implied."

"How do you sleep at night?"

"I sleep next to my wife." Dark said immediately, a cool fire burning in his eyes.

"You are the most reprehensible, disgraceful man I have ever met."

"We are both fathers of daughters." Dark replied, angered into a cold, quiet stillness. "How can you be so repulsive as to hurt yours the way you did? Are you utterly bereft of shame? You saw the look on her face and yet you stand there as though you were the victim, as though you were the one who was wronged."

"Yes, please pretend as if you know anything about it." Saladin argued, "You consider yourself this magnanimous martyr: Poor Dark, being criticized for his actions. Poor Dark, he came from nothing. Poor Dark, being held responsible. Poor Dark, Saladin is such a bully who calls himself out for his manipulation and now, it would seem, exploitation of my child."

Again, Dark clenched his teeth and after forcing himself to take a deep breath he said, "Munafiq." Hypocrite. "All your talk about protecting your daughter, all your talk about wanting to keep her away from those who would harm her, and yet--" He pointed to the stairs, "You broke her. Your daughter. And you stand there as if it was nothing. Daizi so desperately wants you to love her, and to accept her, and you treat her like that, and then stand there as if I am the one who hurts her. Look in the mirror, Saladin. I have never made her cry like that. Never once."

"I am being cruel only to be kind." His voice raised slightly.

Dark's only quieted further, "Where is the kindness, Saladin? I cannot find it."

"If she would only wise up and listen to me, she would be grateful. But she is delusional."

"If she is, she gets it from you." He nearly spat.

Saladin looked him up and down, his contempt utterly unmasked, "Let me know how you feel someday, if Ivy-Qadira disappoints you like this. We will see then if you are so righteous."

"She never could." Dark lowered himself slightly, "And that is the difference between us. I would see how happy my daughter is, even if she was not living the life I dreamt for her. And I would be proud of her, and I would support her. Because she is not my puppet to be manipulated to fulfill my vision. She is not my pet to be kept in a cage. What is it Daizi has done to be disappointing? Been married for ten years and in a loving, monogamous relationship for longer? Put herself through school? Earned a PhD despite her disability? Maintained friendships and hobbies? Adopted teenagers in need of a safe and loving home and gave you a granddaughter? If Ivy grows up to do a tenth of what her mother has done, I would be the proudest parent alive. And if none of that is in her future, I will be proud of her regardless, because she is my child. Protecting her does not mean controlling her."

~~

"Your grandfather?" Sloan asked mildly, standing with her hands on hips, trying to get caught up, "We don't have to talk about it." She turned her head and looked at Enkidu whining at the backdoor confused and at Ivy who looked near to tears, "Can I get you anything?"

First, Blair went to the window, peering at that grim, imposing house across the street for a few moments and then pulled herself away, took a breath, and asked, "Have you eaten? Has she? Come on, sit down." She stepped to the stairs and called up to her husband for a moment, "Will you get our DVD collection?"

"Our what?"

"Our DVDs."

"Just watch Netflix!"

"No, I need the DVDs, they're in the linen closet." Blair yelled back and then turned back to the twins, "I'm sure it'll be okay. Sloan, how about you get some water, okay?"
 
"Thanks," Xander said. He steered Alec and Ivy to the nearest seats. For once, he was glad there was an adult willing to take control. It was strange. A couple of years ago, he never would have trusted someone to go to their house like this. He certainly would not have let them start fussing, but right now... it felt good. He sat down next to Alec and put an arm around his shoulders.

Once Sloan returned with the water, he said, "Yeah, the old man. He's not my grandfather. Mama told him that Ba wasn't going back to work since they didn't want to put Ivy in daycare, but I guess he selectively forgot. Then it came up tonight, and he went ballistic." He paused, clenching his jaw. "Said some stuff he shouldn't have said. Then Ba told us to scram with Ivy. Better that way."

Alec said nothing, still holding Ivy close. He looked at nothing, letting everything happen around him as he fought down the sheer panic Saladin's anger and words had caused. He needed to be there for Ivy. He needed to look after her. He needed to grow up! Steel up! Yet he wanted nothing more than to curl up in a ball in some dark corner. He couldn't. He had to look after Ivy because Xander couldn't. Xander would if he could, but he couldn't. It was up to Alec. He had to trust his parents to deal with their own problems.
 
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