How Green Becomes Wood

"I'd love to sit," Daizi said, letting him help find the clear space, "It's about your father. This Saturday is the twenty-fifth anniversary of." She took a breath, "Of the day his parents died. I wanted you to know, because it might be difficult for him. He hasn't been sleeping well already. I just don't want you to be frightened if he starts seeming a little different."
 
"Ultimately, yes," Daizi answered, having faith in that, "but it might be difficult for him, for awhile. He lost his home and his parents all at once, and then he had his time living like you both had to, but during a war, so we're approaching the twenty fifth anniversary of that, and the anniversary of him leaving Iraq and coming to the United States. You know how frustrated he'll be if we make a fuss, but I didn't want you both to be unaware." She tucked her hair back, "I can only really guess at how it'll feel. He may take it better than I expect but, you're right, Alec. It is hard. I don't know, given his parents, if he would visit their grave, if he could, but I'm not sure if he knows for certain what happened to them."

She knew he had visited the morgue and had both seen and smelled what nobody should have to, but she didn't know if he knew where his parents were buried or if they had been buried at all. It was almost consoling, in a grim way, that there was no love lost. It'd be crushing, she guessed, if he had truly loved and been loved by them.
 
Alec reached out and took her hand, squeezing it gently. "Thank you for telling us," he said softly. "I'll try not to make a fuss but to be more... patient and gentle and kind and whatever else he'll need at the time. Promise."

"He'll be alright," Xander stated as if he were the one answering the question, not asking it. "He'll be fine. He just needs some time, and then he'll be fine. We can give him all the time he needs."
 
Daizi squeezed Alec's hand back, "I know it's not easy to hear about, but I thought it was better you knew rather than being caught unaware. I probably should have warned you earlier. He will be fine, it's true. And so will we. He survived the actual events, I have no worries about him making three the anniversaries."
 
"Exactly," She said, kissing his head, "I don't think there's anything to be afraid of in the long-term. He's a strong man with a great support system and a bottle of anti-depressants," she smiled softly, cupping Alec's chin in her hand, knowing none of what her husband had to support him made it less easy to see him in a low moment, but also knowing it was infinitely better than if he had none of that, "It's not an emergency situation, we don't have to go and get the net. I don't mean to worry you too badly."

In truth, she had no idea how bad it was going to be for Dark and he certainly didn't seem to know. "He may cope better than any of us expect, so far he seems mostly like himself and the start of it is only a few days away." Or, she knew, he may cope worse than she expected.
 
"Okay," Alec said softly. "I believe you. I am not.. Well, I am worried, but not too badly. I will take it as it comes."

"We'll keep an eye on him, and things will work out okay," Xander agreed. He was more worried than he let on, but he knew Daizi didn't need that right now. He'd look after Dark. He'd make sure to watch and try to spot anything Daizi missed, and, together, they'd help him through this. He wasn't worried Dark would do anything "stupid," especially not with Ivy, but with how zoned he got, he might have genuine accidents. Like that time with the knife.
 
"He is so loved." Daizi said, doing her best to not get a bit choked up with emotion saying that. It wasn't even the stress of what they were about to be facing that got to her, at least not in that exact moment, it was the fact this person who was so gentle and thoughtful but who spent so many years thinking he was unworthy of love found himself surrounded by people who loved him so deeply--that is what got her. "We'll all take good care of him when he needs it and do our best not to make him realize he's being so well taken care of. Cooger already knows, he's planning to come by this weekend, if not on Saturday then Sunday."
 
"Cooger is the best," Xander said. "He'll definitely keep Ba safe and secure, and give a babysitting break, too, if you need it with Ivy."

"Will it be alright if I go to work, or do you need me to stay home?" Alec asked.
 
"You go to work," Daizi told Alec firmly, "We aren't in a... state of crisis. It's just..." She sighed, "Grief. Grief over a lot of different things. Anyway, it's your father, you know how annoyed he'd be if you stayed home just because you wanted to make sure he was okay."
 
"Okay. I understand. I just wanted to make sure," Alec told her. "I'll go to work and do my best work ever."

"Do you normally not do your best work?" Xander asked.

Alec flushed lightly. "No. I do great work all the time! You know what I mean."
 
"Just be yourselves, okay?" Daizi told them, squeezing Alec's hand again, "I didn't warn you so we could all hatch a plan to wrap your father up in bubble wrap and force him to drink chamomile tea, I just wanted you to know what he is dealing with, in case you noticed him seeming a bit down. So you didn't have the uncertainty." She touched one hand to her chest and told her boys truthfully, "I'm sad for him, but I'm not scared for him."
 
"I know," Daizi replied gently, "It's easy to react. We love him. Nobody likes when someone you love is going through something difficult." Taking a breath, she thought about things for a moment before saying, "If it does hit him really deeply, and it may not, because grief is weird and unpredictable, and you find it difficult, you can talk to me about it, okay? I'm not sharing all of this with you so you feel like it's your responsibility to take care of your father. Dark would hate it if you even tried to feel that way. I just don't want the two of you to be scared."
 
"Last year was complicated," Xander said. "It's alright that you didn't. There was a lot to worry about, so it had to go to the back of the line until proven it had a fast pass. Now we're ready and armed, meaning it probably won't be a big deal."

Alec nodded. "Thank you for telling us this year."
 
"No, you didn't," Alec assured her. He hugged her back gently. "I love you, Mama, and Ba, too. Even if I was worried, it'd be worth worrying about."

"We'll be alright," Xander told Daizi. "You just focus on the mini and the giant. Us midlings will be just fine."
 
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