How Green Becomes Wood

Xander shifted and reached out before Dark and Daizi got out of reach. Carefully and deliberately, he caught their sleeves, tugging them both, but focusing more on Daizi's. "Sleep well," he told them both quietly. "See you in the morning."
 
"We will," Daizi replied, tugging his sleeve back, and then she repeated, "I love you, Xander."

Dark only gave him a nod and softly said, "I love you, goodnight," before they left the living room. On his way upstairs, Dark stopped in the kitchen to put away the bottle of wine and the glasses, after finishing what was left in Daizi's glass, and then followed her upstairs so they could finally get ready for bed.
 
Xander didn't sleep well that night. Not because of the couch. The couch was actually pretty comfortable. The events of the evening played over in his mind. He was so angry! He managed to calm down mostly and control it, and he was worried about his brother, but he was still angry! And hurt. And he didn't want to be worried, but he was, which made him angrier! And it made him wonder; how would he have acted if Alec had told him about Emma? He knew he would have been upset, but really mad? He didn't think so. Maybe scoffing. Discounting the relationship, maybe, which likely would have hurt just as much if not more than being angry, he was honest enough with himself to consider that. Did he really seem like he would have been that upset, though? So much so that Alec felt he needed to hide it from him? Then he considered what he'd been hiding from Alec. At least he had the excuse that so far all he was was in his "searching phase." If he'd decided he wanted to be Jewish or Islamic or Methodist or Mystic something, he believed he'd tell Alec, but right now, he was just trying to figure out what was even out there. If Alec had found one of his books, would he have reacted the same way Xander had about Emma? He didn't know how to answer that. He hovered between wake and sleep a lot of the night, often hearing Dark moving about somewhere distantly.

The next morning, he was up early and got ready for the day at hyper speed. He was in and out of the bedroom in seconds flat, taking only enough time to see Alec was still breathing. He dressed warmly and went out for a long run, allowing him extra time since he had gotten up so early. Then it was a short but intense workout routine in the basement. While he was down there, he did take a moment to consider a room down here. He didn't need or want a lot of space, and it might be nice, but... they'd never been apart. Still, a small room down here that could be taken down or used as some kind of storage closet if he didn't need it later might be nicer than sleeping on the couch. Finally, he went for a fast shower and went down for breakfast.

Alec hadn't moved from his bed where Daizi had tucked him in last night. He was awake, mostly, but had no intention of moving. No motivation or desire. He lay there surrounded by comfort and hid from the world outside.
 
As soon as Daizi was in bed for the night, she pulled the blanket over herself, rolled over onto her side, and cried. When she had earlier, when she was holding Alec, it was out of empathy and compassion. Now it was from grief and fear, and she wept bitterly, praying in desperation things would change and improve so she wouldn't need to live in fear. Dark crawled into bed beside her and wrapped her up in his arms, pulling her close to his chest. But he couldn't cry. Even after everything that happened that night, he couldn't. He hadn't been able to cry about anything that had happened over the past week. All he could do was hold his wife until she fell asleep, unknowingly echoing how she had consoled their son.

When his arm fell asleep beneath her weight and she was already in a deep sleep, he rolled onto his back and stared up at the top of their canopy bed. He might have fallen asleep for a little while, he wasn't certain, but he was aware he was very much awake, and so he got up. This night he couldn't go downstairs, because Xander was (hopefully) sleeping, but he paced the upper floor. He poked his head into the nursery to check on Ivy, smiling sadly at how peaceful and perpetually untouched she was by all of this. It was a horrible thing to know one day she'd be hurt by it too. One day she'd have to learn her father was broken deep down inside and it would be something she'd need to cope with. But that night, she slept soundly, in her cute little pajamas. He brushed the hair away from her forehead and wondered what must it be like to still be whole? He doubted he ever had been. At least by her age, he guessed, he already wasn't. And she was so little. He wondered if she'd remember him.

Then he forced himself away and shut the door quietly behind him and went into Alec's room. He had noticed light shining from beneath the door. Before shutting it off, he walked beside Alec's bed and adjusted the covers. Since Thursday, he had scarcely been around Alec and even now he had no idea if, come morning, things would be different between them. Xander would certainly still be angry with Alec. He wouldn't be shocked if Alec was still angry with him. All he could do was fix the covers, put one of the fallen stuffed animals back up onto the bed, and shut off the lights before he left.

Then he returned to his bedroom, and once again sat by the window to look out at the stars before finally falling asleep.

Come morning, he cooked breakfast like it was any other day while Daizi got Ivy ready for the day. When Xander emerged looking for food, Dark set out a plate for him, "You are up early. Did you sleep well?"
 
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"Eh," Xander shrugged. "Better than you, I think, but not great." He plopped down and accepted the plate. "Thanks. Oh, and just so you know, yes, I'm going to school, and, no, I don't want to drive Alec, and, no, I don't know if he's up for school." He huffed and glared at the plate. For a rare moment in his life, he actually wasn't all that hungry. He leaned over and started digging in. He refused to let all of this put him off his food!
 
Blinking at Xander, Dark nodded slowly and then went to make another cup of coffee. It was too early for this. "When I finish cooking I will check on him, if Daizi is not able to first."
 
Xander grunted without looking up from his breakfast. He polished off his plate and got up to rinse off his dishes and clean up his area. He was ahead of schedule, but he didn't want to leave without saying goodbye to Daizi. He slowly started getting ready to leave, waiting for her.
 
Not long after Dark turned to make more coffee, Daizi came downstairs. She had a bit of a headache from dehydration, but was happily talking with Ivy and telling her all about what a great day they were going to have. "Sabah al-Khair," She said, "Ivy, say sabah al-Khair!"

"Sabah al-Nur," Dark replied, "There is tea for you in your normal place."
 
Ivy returned the fist bump, happily babbling at him immediately, but Daizi moved her to the high chair and set her down, "Is it that time already? I'll go check up on Alec. First, though, Xander, how are you?"
 
"Have a nice day," Daizi said warmly and then drank a few sips of tea before telling Dark, "You eat, I'll go see how Alec is doing. I suspect he's going to stay home sick today."

"He will go tomorrow," Dark replied, "I will call him out now, if we have neither seen nor heard from him, I presume he is not intending to go. He typically does not after nights like yesterday's."

"We need to tell him he needs to text us if he needs a mental health day instead of making us guess, he owes us at least that," Daizi said, taking another sip of tea before going upstairs and knocking on Alec's door.
 
Alec was still in bed. The most he had managed was to roll over. He hadn't even picked up his phone from where it had fallen under the bed. He didn't care. When Daizi knocked, he mumbled, "Come in," and hoped she heard.
 
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