How Green Becomes Wood

Alec blushed and hunkered down farther in his seat. "Thanks," he mumbled. He didn't say anything further as they drove. This time, it was mostly because of sheer exhaustion after dealing with emotions he didn't want to face.
 
That was the most Alec had ever looked like his brother. When they parked in the driveway and got out of the car, Dark stretched and said, "I am going to get you some plastic tubs to put your projects in," he said, "when you have a moment, can you tell me how many you would need? It might be nice if you can have a bin per project."
 
Alec looked up at Dark, startled in the middle of unbuckling his seatbelt. "What? What do you mean? Are you getting rid of it?" Anxiety colored his voice and made him squeakier than he had been in a long time.
 
"No, I just thought it might make it easier to keep track of," Dark replied easily, "It might make it easier for you to see what you have and find what supplies you are looking for. Are you ever working with a pair of scissors, but you set them down, and next thing you know you have to spend twenty minutes trying to find where the scissors got to?"
 
Alec hesitated, still nervous, but maybe Dark had a good point. "Maybe sometimes," he admitted, "but I kind of like having everything out... do I really need to put it in bins?"
 
"It may be a bit different at first, but when you get used to it it will be easier." Dark told him easily, waiting by the car until Alec felt comfortable getting out.

"It would make things easier on me," Daizi said as she got out of the car, "I'm not in your room very often, but every time I go in there, there's no way for me to know where things are on the floor. I'd hate to break something you're working on because the shape of your path is different than it was the last time I came in."
 
"Oh," Alec said. He hadn't really thought of that. He got out of the car and closed the door. "I suppose... maybe it would be okay to put it in bins... as long as I can keep them in my room."
 
"Okay," Alec agreed, uneasy, but willing. As long as this wasn't an underhanded way to get rid of a lot of his things, he was willing to comply.

Inside, Sally sat on the floor with Ivy in the living room, playing peek-a-boo with her.
 
Ivy was old enough to also make the hand motions, so she was torn between laughing her head off and making the peek-a-boo gestures back at Sally, having the absolute best time.

But, when the door opened and she looked towards the sound and saw her parents and Alec, she immediately forgot about the game and made such loud, excited noises, it seemed like she may combust.
 
"Yes, indeed!" Sally said, wincing a little at the noise. "That's your father- I mean, Baba! And Mama! And there's Alec! Look who is home!"

Alec smiled, tired but happy with how happy Ivy was. "HI! HI, Ivy!"
 
"Hi habibti!" Daizi said happily, slipping off her shoes and touching the salt before leaning her cane against the wall and crouching down holding her arms out without even taking off her coat, "Mama missed you so much! Did you have fun playing with your Khalaty Sally?"

Not even knowing whose name to yell out first, Ivy crawled over to her family as quickly as she possibly could. "Baba missed you very much, Ivy-Qadira," Dark said, smiling down at her while he hung up his coat and moved his wife's cane to where it actually belonged so she wouldn't end up losing it, "Was she good for you, Sally?"
 
"Like gold!" Sally assured him as she pushed herself up off the floor. "Oof. Why do floors get farther away the older we get? We had a small rough patch, but it was over soon enough, and the rest of the time we enjoyed ourselves. Didn't we, little Ivy-Qadira?"
 
"Of course! It was a lot of fun," Sally assured him. She collected her purse, told Ivy goodbye, even if she wasn't paying attention, and slipped on her shoes. "See you again soon!"

Alec watched her go and then started heading for the stairs. He was hoping to see Xander, but Xander was nowhere to be seen. The van was here, which meant he was home. Somewhere. Oh well. Some alone time in his room sounded nice. Maybe a brief nap. Anything to decompress.
 
"Say bye-bye, Ivy!" Daizi said, waving goodbye to Sally so Ivy would too, before attacking her baby with more kisses. It had gotten somewhat easier to leave Ivy home since they both had gotten used to it, but she couldn't deny she always felt better when they were reunited. She didn't even know what fears were in her mind about it, really, because rationally she knew of course it'd be okay. But something deep and primal wanted to be able to be certain of her baby's comfort at all times. When she was home, she could be.

With Sally gone, Dark went over to try to get his turn with his daughter, reminding Daizi she had to take off her coat eventually. As soon as they were able to actually able to exit the front hall, they slotted back into their constant routine with her. Once the relief of being back with their daughter subsided, they both recognized they wanted to rest, too, but only so much was manageable.

It was another quiet afternoon, leading to a quiet dinner. That night, on the therapist's suggestion, they did hand the twins plates with the food already set up, hoping it would just be accepted easily.

That night, Dark and Daizi spoke for awhile before falling asleep. Daizi managed to stay sleeping, but Dark soon found himself awake again, much to his frustration. He had one great night of sleep and now he was back to this. He kept willing the thoughts in his mind to just be quiet, but he couldn't stop from dwelling on Dr. Hepburn saying Alec idolized him. Although he had been told similar sentiments before about his boys, he couldn't understand---especially then, with how he felt about himself---why anyone would idolize him. And he got so deep into the overwhelming self-loathing, he got restless. His hands felt tight. His blood felt hot. And when he couldn't take it, he pushed himself out of bed. He knew what he wanted to do but knew he couldn't, so instead he slipped down to the kitchen, took an ice cube, wrapped it in paper towel, and pressed it again his bare wrist, the slight sting passing through the barrier just enough to settle him. He stood in the shadows of the silent kitchen looking out at the orange glow of the street lamps illumination the falling snow. It still wouldn't stick, he thought, wishing he could finally just cry.
 
Alec spent a lot of time in his room, thinking about what Dr. Hepburn had said, resting quietly, and sometimes looking over his things and thinking about putting them in bins. He didn't particularly want to put them in bins, but the way Dark had said it didn't sound like that was much of an option. Also, his mother commenting about how it was difficult to get through. He felt terrible he hadn't fully realized that. He'd tried to keep pathways clear, but things moved, sometimes without him noticing it. No wonder she felt unstable in here. He would do it. For them. He didn't actually act on that thought beyond making a mental catalogue, but it was something he intended to do. Just not right then.

Later, when he came down for dinner, Xander was there, but he seemd distracted and thinking about something else. He wasn't dismissive, just not paying attention. Xander was a little confused when his food was plated for him, but he didn't mention it. Food was food and it was being presented to him. Alec didn't think much about it at all. He didn't fully clean his plate, but he got closer than many other days. Then he did a few chores and went back to bed, quickly falling asleep.

Thanks to the extra sleep he'd been getting, Alec found himself waking up in the middle of the night. He rolled over and tried to find his phone to check the time, but, as usual, he couldn't find it. Deciding it didn't really matter, he lay staring at the ceiling, soon caught up in a mental circle. This leading to that leading to this... Finally, he decided to get up and get a drink. Maybe that would help him go back to sleep.

Quietly, Alec tiptoed down the stairs and toward the kitchen. Xander was snoring lightly on the couch and occasionally muttering something, deeply asleep. Alec walked into the kitchen and flicked on a light. A dark shape loomed before him, and he jumped so hard his feet left the ground. A little squeal of shock escaped him before he realized who it was.

"Ba!" he gasped, half leaned over. "I think you just took ten years of my life!"
 
When the lights were suddenly turned on, Dark shut his eyes, nearly wincing from the sudden change in light. But he did not flinch or jump at Alec's shock and instead slowly turned his body towards his son, "I did not expect anyone else to be awake. Why are you up?"
 
"I woke up and couldn't go back to sleep," Alec told him, willing his heart rate to calm down. "I came to get a drink. What are you doing in here?" He walked cautiously into to kitchen to get his drink.
 
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