Smugglers Cove (Love2write and Silence)

Killian almost couldn't wait till they got home. True there were little folk under the ground and they appeared to have an entire city under the ground, but he was more interested right now with the samples he collected. "Star we can just keep the tunnels a secret right now. Who knows what would happen. As long as they aren't really bothering anyone I wouldn't say anything." Taking a seat he started to look over his rocks and then shook his head. "I need a microscope. Gonna go see if I can use Witteck's lab."

The doctor heard a knock on his door and he opened it to see that Killian had a giant sack full of samples. "What's this all about?"

"I need to test a few things."

"Not in here." Witteck glowered at the Chip. Sometimes these people got the strangest notions and he studied them, but never really understood how they got to some of the conclusions that they did. Killian was no different though his motives were sometimes different than the average Chip's.

Since Witteck was refusing he had to think of a quick reason to at least test the rock. "It's not like other rocks and they cover the mountains. What if the mineral is what causes so many of those randoms sicknesses? We might need to install a filtration system." Killian rubbed the rock in his hand and he waited for Witteck to say anything at all.

As much as the doctor hated to admit it, he was a bit curious himself. "Well then bring it over here." Of course one test led to another and then he was going through entire sample boxes with Killian. One item at a time and he explained as he went how to use the equipment and what to look for. Killian was more than glad to learn how to use and clean the equipment as long as it meant that he could use it to analyze his findings. What if they were important or something he could sell? Witteck was looking for medicine, or disease and Killian wanted to find money. Staring at the data and molecular make up from the rock he frowned a little and started to read the definition of the product based on their findings. "It's Chromium Triethylide." Pausing for a moment he thought and then his face brightened as Witteck scowled. The doctor was already trying to find a way to filter traces amounts of it out of the water.

Killian made a quick copy of the paper and raced out of the lab toward the house. Bursting through the door of their home he yelled, "Star I found out what was in the rock! Witteck is working on a filter and I want you to help me do some research." He was still not proficient enough to do research because his reading and writing was miserable. However, he could remember most things if they were important.

Star chuckled at him. "Research? Killian, honey, you know I'm terrible at that sort of thing." She picked up Claire from the crib with a soft grunt.

"But..." Killian frowned. "I'll tell you what I need you to search. I just don't read or write well enough to do it by myself."

She smiled at him lightly. She couldn't say no to those bright pleading green eyes. "Ok." She relents and grabs Claire's bag. "Let's go then."

Killian took the baby and the bag from Star. "I'll just head over to the ship. We've got a pretty good pad in there and I doubt Witteck would be as excited about the process I'm going to be taking. It's got Chromium Triethylide in it." By the look on Star's face it didn't seem that she knew what that meant. "It makes the enamel coating that allows ships to pass through bubble shields. There is a market for that stuff. So much of it up in those mountains. If I know the process to make the sheets we could make a good amount of living. Maybe enough that I could actually buy one of these ships." Killian was missing owning a ship for just himself and they had to ask to use these. Exploration had been nice, but he wanted a ship for himself. "If I smuggle it to the black market...."

"Why would you need to smuggle it? You could just sell it normally." Star asks.

"Black market pays better prices." Killian looked at her. "And I can drive a better deal. Besides if I go to the regular market I can almost bet the nobles would be the ones buying it."

Star made a face. "Yeah, lets not give them access to enamel that can help them penetrate a shield. So, what do you need me to do then? Research how to actually extract this chro tri stuff?"

She already knew what he was going to have her research and he grinned. "Yeah. I want to know how to extract it and then I'll go make a deal with the council to see if they'll let me try this out."

"If this has the potential to make the amount of chips you think it can...then, I'll do what I can to help you out." She says with a smile. "It'll be good for us to learn something new together."

"Good." Killian looked over at her and winked. "Next stop after we get a deal from the council to buy a ship I'll head up to the mountains and get the process started." About that time he got wide eyed. "Oh shit...I forgot Cin up there."

"Oh, he'll be fine. Killian. Pretty soon he'll be too big to keep around anyway." Star says.

Nodding he agreed momentarily. "Yeah probably. Doesn't mean I won't miss him. Sort of nice to have a bear almost as big as I am."

Star shuddered slightly. Cin had been pretty peaceful but he still scared the crap out of her sometimes. "Well, if you're going back up in those mountains, take a crew with you. You'll need help mining those rocks and getting them back to the ship. I'll do what I can to research what needs to be done to separate the minerals from the rocks."

"I'll have a crew with me. We'll probably build a bunk house up there and make a small processing plant so that I can do it all at the same place. Gonna need a crew to make runs anyway. Just going to have to see if there is anyone that would be willing to make a crew with me." Killian was almost glowing with the excitement of a new venture. "Star when it's quiet we could go stay in the bunkhouse. There will be seasons when its too cold to mine."

Star nodded. "I'd like that. Just make sure to make it comfortable, yeah?"

"Of course I will." Killian rolled his eyes at her. "Not gonna have you sleeping on rocks or anything."

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The council approved the idea, but with one stipulation. "Killian we do believe such a venture could be profitable, however we will need some kind of assurance to pay for the ship in the meantime. We need you as a guard of the colony." Kavis could barely imagine his luck getting any better. They had Killian right here playing into their hands in an unusual manner, but none the less it would suit the purpose. "You're right a resource in our own land and one to sell on the black market. It makes you the ideal choice. I'll ensure that all Chippeqouti know it is a job worthy of our cause. I don't need them to consider your blood when such ventures arise. Returning to the question of the guard. You were right again. We do need to have a guard against all credible threats and I would like your expertise in that area. It seems that you've become an accomplished warrior despite your upbringing. Also if the venture with this rock goes poorly you will need some other work to pay for the ship."

Killian nodded it sounded fair enough. Perhaps more pressure than he wanted...but he didn't plan on owing the Chippeqouti council his life. Outright buying the ship would take around 8 full runs if he used his entire cut. If he and Star were going to make a living he could plan about a year of full runs and his cut to pay for the ship and the additional costs of living.

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Kato of course stuck close by for the whole time that she was on the treatment. Many times at night she woke to feel his arms around here. There was a different kind of manner about him. The doctor was concerned and he barely had an edge of the bed. Anna tried to scoot closer to her end so that Kato would be more comfortable though it was never enough space for them to be completely comfortable.

By the end of the 10 days of treatment she had the last plug removed and she was sent home with another week of the pills in a graduating lower dose. It seemed from rumor that Killian was out into more of his ventures. That never ending pace left her wondering how Star was doing and made her glad that she had a slow and steady doctor. "Mmmm...You don't know how glad I am that you're happy to just be a doctor." Standing on her toes she kissed Kato and winked at him. "So...now that we're home we could actually have real cuddling time without it being awkward."

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Killian spent alternating weeks of being on the fly and to the markets along with his work at the mines. It was hard work and he got a little darker from all the hours in the sun. This time he was on his long break that he had scheduled. They all needed to get home. Oddly none of the humans had wanted to work with Killian and he wasn't sure why they wouldn't want to. It might have been the fact that the crew only got about 1 week out of 5 at home. He missed Star and Claire. They almost had the ship paid for though. Star was doing everything she could to set money aside and spend as little as possible.

Coming through the door he grinned broadly at Star. "I'm home for a whole week now." This rotation had gone on enough times that even Claire seemed to know about time he should be getting home. By now the baby was dragging herself a little faster across the floor and she pulled herself up using his pantlegs. "My gosh." Leaning over he picked her up. "You've gotten so much bigger." Claire was growing up and he barely got to see it anymore. "How were the last couple of weeks?"

"Lonely. I hate that you're gone so long." Star tilted her head up and gave him a long kiss. "But...peaceful. Everything is going well. My garden is going crazy but those little buggers keep stealing the best of it. I've started to leave out pies in hopes they'll leave something of their own. They did." Star raised up her wrist, revealing a blue bracelet with charms hanging off of it. "I think they're figuring out the trade idea. But enough about me!" She pulled him toward the kitchen. "Come, eat. Tell me how things have been with you."

Killian knew she hated that he was gone so much. It couldn't be helped for now. "Oh they did huh?" Holding her wrist up he chuckled. "Great...A bracelet for how much of your produce?" Chuckling he shook his head. "Oh well." Limping toward the table he took a seat and scooted back so that Claire couldn't quite reach his plate. "Not much. Been working about 14 hours a day to get the processing done and get those sheets ready to sell. Made that last run. We might be able to pay off the ship faster if I can work out a new deal with one of the dealers in the market. He's wanting in on this and its sounding like we'll get 500 more credits per sheet. Oh and Cin is huge. He's bigger than me now. Came charging out of the mountains the other day and we went for a little tumble. Too big and he got a little rough playing with me."

Star made a face. "If he breaks your neck I'm coming up there and shooting him." She gave Claire a carrot and the babe began munching on it herself. "She's almost begun feeding herself now. Smart kid. Just like her daddy." Star smiles.

"Nah, he's good. I yelled at him and he let me get up. Just got my leg stuck in some boulders when we were playing and that's what got me." Killian smirked when Star gave the carrot to Claire. "Well you know she gets it from you to." Taking his fork he dug into the food and took his first bite. Star always made the best food.

Star smirks at him. "That's right, she does. And she's got the good looks from me too. Except this hair." She ran a finger through the massive black curls. "Sometimes I'm tempted to just shave it all off. Its a pain to wash when she gets something stuck in it."

The curls Killian always thought were cute. "Agh...She'll outgrow them when she gets a bit older. I outgrew most of mine." It was only partially true since his hair was still a thick rumpled mess most days. "Oh and I forgot to tell you that this food is so good. Feels like I'm starving up there. The cook is almost as bad as I am." Killian took another bite while he listened to Star.

Star laughs. "Well, how about I join you guys this tour? I'll cook and clean...You probably need a woman's touch up there for a bit, hmm?"

Chuckling a little he scooped some of the squash up with his fork. "Umm...Its just a plain bunkhouse with no bedrooms. We all sleep in the same space and only 1 outhouse. Most of us just pee outside. Kitchen is in a tent and...You could come just I don't know if it would be comfy for you and Claire to share the same space with us all."

Star shrugged. "Guess you'll just have to make me a guest house then." She winks.

"Yeah we might have to. Maybe one of these trips back I'll be able to bribe them all with an occasional visit from you to cook for us. They might be willing to work a few extra hours with me to get it done." Killian took a few more bites and stopped. "I'm sorry its good...really the food is great. Just not feeling good the last few days."

Her forehead narrowed in worry. "Are you pushing yourself to hard? Getting sick. Maybe you should take the month off."

"Probably pushed it a little hard the last few days." Killian shrugged, "Nothing a little sleep won't fix."

Star narrowed her eyes at him. "If you're not feeling better by the end of the week, promise me you'll stay. The last thing either of us needs is you working yourself to death."

Killian nodded. "Yeah I'll stay if I don't improve." Getting up from the table he leaned over and took one more bite. "Damn its good food. I'll eat the rest of it tomorrow."

Star laughed. "There's plenty of this where it came from. Unless you're just really tired and needing to go to bed."

"Think I'll go to bed." Killian set Claire on the floor and headed back toward their bedroom.

Star watched him go worriedly. He must have been a lot sicker than he was letting on. Usually the first thing on his mind upon getting home was food and sex. She picked up Claire and followed him to the bedroom. If he wasn't showing signs of improvement in the morning she was going to get Dr. Witteck over here to check him out. It was unusual for a Chip to be sick.

In the room Killian stripped his shirt off and sat on the edge of the bed while he took his boots off. He was just so tired. Before he got settled in he punched his pillow a few times to get it into a ball and then laid down. Later in the evening he felt Star crawl into the bed with him and he opened his eyes briefly. "Hey." Closing his eyes again he went back to sleep. It was almost four in the morning and he turned over in the bed to lay on his side. Suddenly he tensed like he did sometimes when he had dreams. After nearly half a minute he relaxed and then he started to tense again and his muscles convulsed. Immediately following the 3-4 minute seizure he started into another one.

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No matter how she felt about it the doctor had orders. In the time that it took for her to have a group of men help load Killian to the medical bay he'd had a series of 3 different seizures. There were very few things that could do that to a Chip and she had the treatment, but she had to send Star to get it. By that point it could be too late. In the event that she would have to jump start his heart again the doctor took the watch off his wrist. It was only stressing Star out anyway.

The Chippeqouti doctor stepped out of the room while technicians tried to get I.V.'s started during a phase between seizures. "Dr. Witteck can go with you to get this plant here." Handing a picture to Star she sighed. "I'll find a Chip woman that can take care of Claire until you come back. For every seizure he has it could cause brain damage or even do what we call kindling and make him epileptic. A ship has already been started. We'll do what we can to control the seizures and I have some medicine to prevent further damage if they can get the I.V.'s. There isn't enough for full treatment." While it might have been imaginable that she would have a hard time giving this news to a young wife and mother she felt even worse because it was a lie. They were slowly poisoning him over the last several weeks and she had more than enough treatment because other explorers had brought it back in anticipation for this day.
 
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Star woke up as Killian tensed beside her. She rubbed his arm gently, figuring it was just another bad dream and was about to go back to sleep when he began to tremble, violently. She shot up, wide awake now as her watch went crazy. He was having a seizure. She immediately called Dr. Witteck on the data pad. "It's Killian! He...he's having seizures. Please hurry." She threw the covers off of Killian and had to fight to push him to the middle of the bed so he wouldn't fall and hit his head again. She fought off against the panic while the doctors got Killian onto a gurney and struggled to get him back to the ship.

She snatched up Claire and babe's diaper back, rushing them both next door to Kato and Anna. She didn't even knock. "Anna. Killian's having seizures. Please watch Claire for a bit." She rushed back out the door and Kato watched her go. "More seizures...poor woman." He looked down at Claire who was bawling from being torn from her sleep so cruelly. "Aw, poor little thing." He lifted her up and she settled down, laying on his shoulder, whimpering softly. "Well, what do you know...she likes me." He grins at Anna.

Star paced while the doctor was forced to restart his heart and tried to ease the seizures. She couldn't give her any explanation to what was causing it but she was sending her after some plant for him. Honestly it pissed her off a bit that they were sending her for the plant. But, maybe the doctor was trying to be kind and give her something to do to other than sit around worrying. No one would be as fast or as determined as she would be. She looked up at the doctor. "Is he...Is he dying?"
The doctor nodded solemnly and Star covered her mouth, trying to keep from sobbing.
"How...how long do I have...to get this plant and bring it back?"
"Two days. Three at most....after that...I'm afraid the brain damage will full and permanent. Even if his body survived this...he would be no more than a plant himself."
Star took a deep shaky breath. "Ok..." She whispered. "I'll go. Please...take care of him." She rushed off to the ship, not even bothering to stop to grab a change of clothes or an overnight bag. She had no time to waste. She found Dr. Witteck already on board waiting for her at the navigation console. "Witteck...what? What are you doing here?"
"They asked me to help you find the right plant and enough of it to make a serum for him to be ready by the time we get back. It will save us alot of time and probably save his brain as well."
Star nods. "Thankyou, Doctor. You have no idea how much this means to me."
The man smiled and took the ship into orbit. "Let's save your husband."
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"Is that it?" Star asked, peering down at the green and brown planet below them. There was a large dome covering nearly half of the planet. "Whoa, wonder what that is about."
Witteck shrugged. "I'm not sure, but this is the place they said we could find the plant. We should be in range to start landing in..." He paused, tapping buttons on the console.
"What's wrong?" Star asked.
"I'm...not sure. The whole system is being very...odd." He swiped at the screen but it did nothing.
Star tapped on the screen herself, pulling up a diagnostic. "This can't be right?"
Witteck looked over at her, confused.
"The only thing that could cause these sorts of readings is..." She looks up as lights begin fluctuating all over the ship and a humming sound begins to grow. "Sh**! There's a virus overloading the ship. We have minutes at most before the core goes critical!"
"What!? You mean? Explode!?" Witteck exclaims. Star was already pulling him out of his chair.
"No time to explain, we have to get to the escape pods!" She sprinted with him down the hall, down the stairs and into the belly of the ship where the pods were. Behind them the lights began powering down. No doubt the virus was locking everything down, trying to keep them from getting out. "Get in and press the button! Don't wait! We have seconds!"

Star leapt into the nearest escape pod, slamming the emergency eject button before she even had a chance to buckle in. With the virus only seconds away from trapping them she didn’t have time to waste. The pod closes and shoots away from the ship with the force of a rocket. The ship suddenly exploded and sent the pod spinning through the sky. Unbuckled she was a rag doll being thrown about. Her head hit the back of the pod and everything went black.
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“There’s someone in here. I think they’re still alive.” A voice echoes in her pounding head. She could hear the sound of fire crackling, people yelling and cloth smacking against the hull of the pod.
“Hurry! Put this fire out before she burns! Tess, uses your coat!” An older man’s voice commands.
Star coughed hoarsely as smoke filled her lungs. Her face and arms burned with the heat from the fire around her pod. The metal had bent from the landing and had her pinned, keeping her from helping with the rescue effort. She useless do anything but pray they got her out in time.
“Mark! Where’s that water!?” The commanding voice orders again as the fire continues to burn.
Star tried to push the bent metal off of her but it burnt her hand. “Help…” She pleads weakly. She wheezes trying to gather whatever oxygen was left in the pod. It was taking too long. She was going to burn in here. Killian...Claire...they needed her. She couldn’t die yet. She wheezed and coughed again, black spots forming in her eyes.
There was a loud sizzling as water splashes over the pod and drops of hot water drip onto her skin. And that was the last sensation she felt before passing out again.
***
Star wakes as someone tries to pour some water in her mouth. She chokes for a moment before gulping down the rest of it. Everything hurt, her face and right arm especially felt like they were still on fire.
“Aye, there ya go lass. Jist you rest now. You’ll be fine.”
Star blinks open her eyes and looks over at a huddled figure sitting beside her. The first thing she noted was that her right eye was not working. She reached up a hand, relieved to find it was just a bandage blocking her sight. “Aye...don’t touch now...spent long enough gettin’ that into place. Don’t want ye gettin’ infection now...aye?”
Star blinked at the speaker with her uncovered eye. He looked like a tiny human almost. Very gnomish with long white hair hanging from his chin and a bald head. He couldn’t have been more than four feet tall while standing, and his body was naught but gray skin and bones. He grinned at her with a smile missing several yellowed teeth, and pale white eyes.
“If yer gonna scream, try and not do it too loud aye? My ears are a bit sensitive.” He gestures to his massive bat-like ears. Definitely not human...but sorta human.
“What? Are you?” She asks hoarsely. Now that she thought about it, he looked like one of those underground creatures Killian and her had discovered.
“What!? What am I!? I’m a Kesh! Obviously…” He scoffs.
“Not obvious to me…”
The kesh smirks. “Aye, wise-lass now are ya? Good. You’ll need that attitude if yer gonna survive here. I’m Vex. What are you called?”
“Star.”
“Star? Like the things in the sky?” He tilts his head curiously.
“Yes.”
“So strange...why would ye name anyone by a thing around them or in the sky. Like naming someone Grass...oh yea...we have one of ‘em too.” Vex stands.
“Wait...where am I?” Star calls to him as he headed toward the tent exit.
“Where is you? Well, ye be in prison, lass. Don’t you remember gettin’ convicted? Must’ve hit your head harder than I thought.”
“Prison? Convicted?” Star sat up, her head pounding at the sudden movement. She gripped her right arm which only made it burn worse. “No, there’s a mistake. I’m not a prisoner...I...I escaped a ship that was about to explode.”
“Meh, say whatever story you like, Lass. You still a convict like the rest of us. Welcome to Hell.” He chortles and shuffles out of the makeshift tent.

Prison? She couldn’t be. She had to get to Killian. He was dying...and Claire. She needed her mother. Star stands slowly and limps to the entrance of the tent, pushing aside the flap. Her mouth gaped. There was a shield around the area, far as the eye could see. People milled about around metal or wood shanti hovels, or peered out from their tents. They stared at her like she was a fresh piece of meat. Especially the males. There were at least eight different species displayed here including gillicks, chippequoti, human, Kesh, bippen and a few others she didn’t recognize. She could only imagine they were the worst of the worst here...exiled on this prison planet because they were too dangerous to keep in an actual prison. That did not bode well for her.

“Wait...Vex. I need to get off this planet...my husband…” Star hurries after Vex as he trots into the deeper parts of the shanty town.
Several of the people around her laugh cruelly. “There is no leaving, Lass. Once yer here, the only way out is six feet under.” Vex shrugged at her. “Forget about your family. You ain’t never seeing them again.”
Star felt like a sword had gone through her heart. Killian...no. Killian...Claire. A tear trickled down her cheek. She wasn’t even sure how long she’d been out. He could’ve been dead by now. She’d never see him again and Claire would be raised without ever knowing her father. She had to get back to her. To her baby. No matter what. And Killian...what was she going to do without him. He was dying, going to die and there was nothing she could do.

Star spun as she felt someone come up behind her. One of the male humans hovered over her, that unmistakable look in his eyes. “I’ll keep you warm and safe, baby. Just come back with me to my tent. He reached out to grope her but she snatched his fingers and twisted hard, breaking them. He screamed, falling to his knees. “Come near me again and I’ll do worse down below.” She broke another finger and he curled into a ball writhing. She released him, looking down at her own hand. This was the first time since getting the chippequoti treatment that she’d actually gotten into an altercation with someone. Breaking his fingers had been way too easy. She looked up and noted several eyes on her. They had once perceived her as an easy target and now were reevaluating their previous judgement.

“Excuse me.” Star turned and looked down at a boy no older than 15. Wasn’t this a prisoner colony? If so, why was he here. He was just a child still.
“My father hopes you’ll come see him. He’s the one who rescued you from that pod a few days back.”
“A few days?” Star’s heart dropped in the pit of her stomach. Then Killian…She staggered and would’ve fallen had the boy not supported her.
“Whoa, easy. Maybe you should lay back down, Miss. C’mon. My father is a good man. He’ll protect you.” The boy led her through the shanty town and she followed listlessly. Killian...Killian...I failed you. I’m so sorry, I’m sorry...so sorry. Tears streamed down her face.
She barely noticed when they reached one of the larger shanty homes or when she was escorted inside or when a fellow human greeted her and offered her a strange colored tea. She sat as she was guided but her mind was lost in grief. All she could think about was Killian lying in that bed having back to back seizures. Dying. And Claire...she’d be left alone. Claire. Killian. It was too much.
“She’s in shock.” The man in front of her notes.
“Less shock as it is grief I think. Must’ve been forced to leave someone behind.” A woman to her right, touches her hand, smiling kindly at her. “The pain will pass...eventually.”
Star looked in her direction, tears flowing freely. “My husband, my baby...Killian.” She stares at her hand, her ring was gone. Stolen while she slept. Her lip quivers and she covers her face with hand, sobbing. Killian…
 
Anna woke up to hear Star burst into the house and ask her about watching the baby. Immediately her eyes flew open and she rushed as fast as she could with her growing belly to take the baby from Star. Claire was hardly baby sized anymore, but she still qualified as such. Before she could say anything Star was running out of the room and Anna took Claire to the dinosaur room and laid her down. The baby was too heavy to be held for very long. Gently she patted the baby's back till Kato came in and picked her up. "Yeah I don't think its all that surprising that she likes you." Anna smiled gently though there was still a sad tone to her voice and face.

Poor Star. It seemed that they had a very bad stretch of luck and there was certainly no ignoring the fact that Killian had been getting increasingly worse with his seizures. Somehow they had gotten worse over the years. Maybe it was epilepsy and maybe there was something else going on. Nobody ever found anything wrong with him. Little Claire seemed to want to nestle into Kato's shoulder and Anna nodded to him. "You know she was used to being carried around by Killian whenever he was home." She knew that Kato hadn't spent nearly as much time around Star and her family mostly because Killian and Kato didn't get along. Anna knew them better and she hated to see this happen to her friend. "She's a daddy's girl." Playing with the tips of the baby's fingers she watched as Claire began to fall asleep again.

That very morning Star left in a ship and Anna had spent most of the rest of the night wandering between her room and Kato's. He put her to sleep initially and then went back to bed since he had to get back up for work the next morning.


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The doctor took the syringe with the antidote and added it to the I.V. and then she slowly started to add the serum from the plant to ease the seizures. Gradually the shaking got a little slower and less frequent. After half an hour she added a little more serum and then he stopped shaking all together. While he was still mostly unconscious she took a scan to see if his brain had experienced any damage or if there were indications of new patterns that could reveal kindling and a future that possibly included epilepsy. Sighing she nodded her head. They had got him here in time and now all they had to do was make it through the next few long days waiting for Star to arrive. While she knew she was given orders to tell Star he would die without the additional serum she didn't know that Star would not be coming back.

A day later while Killian was resting in his room the doctor received notice that Star's ship had blown up and another scout ship had been sent out to a closer planet in hopes of finding the final vial of serum needed. The doctor walked into the patient's room and checked the I.V.'s. Adding another round of the serum she watched him for several minutes. It was all for show. This entire thing and it made her angry. Yet there was nothing that she could do except try to make sure he made a full recovery. During one of the several scans she found that his skull had made a wonderful recovery as had his brain.

Killian slowly became more aware of his surroundings and he shifted uncomfortably in the bed. His head hurt and he wasn't sure what happened. "Ugh..." Turning in the bed he reached for Star and instead flopped his arm over the edge of railing on a bed. Slowly he opened his eyes and sat up. One of the council members were there instead of Star and he frowned. "W-where's Star?"

Tilting his head to the side Dougal frowned. "She died. Star went in search of the serum with Dr. Witteck. The ship experienced some sort of engine problem. I'm sorry there was nothing we could do and we haven't been able to find any sign of her or the ship." Laying a hand on Killian's shoulder he looked into the man's green eyes.

"Serum? What are you talking about?" Killian tried to work his brain through this. It was so shocking at this point that he hadn't even processed Star being gone.

This was not the approximate response that they expected. Still it could be used. "The mines are poisonous and you reacted to it. Many others had to be treated. Killian, you had several successive seizures and we sent out another ship to a closer planet to get the last of the serum as soon as we realized her ship had problems. She left for the cure." Dougal tried to emphasize what he knew of the woman. Star would have done anything for Killian and he wanted to be sure that was played out in the other's mind.

Gradually it began to sink in and Killian stared almost blankly at the wall behind Dougal's head. "Oh..." Silent tears began to roll down his face and he thought for a long minute before he said anything else. "What about Claire?"

"Claire is safe. Star left her with Anna and Kato." Getting up from his seat the fellow Chippeqouti glanced down at Killian. It was pathetic. The Chip was so attached to his human that he cried as if she were his life long mate. Star couldn't be and they made sure of that. Still he figured that he'd better end with a sincere statement. "I wish you a fast recovery."

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With the mines supposedly being dangerous Killian stared at the toxicology report. The doctor had made one up to reflect the results she was told to find. Filtration seemed to work, but direct contact with mining was deadly. For the last few days Killian held himself together and now he was staring at this...all this and it couldn't have gone more wrong.

Taking a small bag with his belongings he left the hospital. It was probably better to go home and do what he needed to before he went to pick up Claire. His walk was a slow methodical pace and he stared at the ground even as he pushed the door open to the house. Inside he could see the little bit of laundry that she had left to fold in the morning. Their bed was a ball of sheets and blankets. Killian dropped to his knees and pounded the floor with his fist screaming while the tears flooded down his face. His knuckles split and started to bleed. Each new hit to the floor sent a spasm of pain into his arm.

Getting to his feet he walked over to his dresser and threw it to the ground. He nearly grabbed hers too, but he saw a picture that she kept of both of them on it and instead he flopped it face down on the dresser and walked over to the bed where he laid down and took her pillow. It still smelled like her hair and that fruity smelling wash she put in it. Burying his face in the pillow he cried until he fell asleep.

By the time Killian woke up it was evening so he picked his dresser up off the floor and neatened the house again. His fist and swelled to a good size and bruised. It was possible he broke it though he doubted that since he could still flex and extend his hand. Wandering into the living room he saw several messages left on a pad. Picking it up he pressed his thumb into the corner and it showed several bills from the hospital, what he owed on the ship, and finally the cost of the serum. The council had chosen not to charge him for the last vial of serum in honor of his loss and neither had they charged for the ship that blew up since it was defective and not of his doing. As gracious as it may have seemed he grit his teeth. All those months he was poisoning himself for nothing. In fact he was in more debt now than he had been when he made the deal with the council and it would take nearly 100 years to pay all the debt back if he worked as a guard which was what they demanded starting in a week.

Just enough time to arrange for a service and that was it. Killian stepped out of the house. It was dark, but not too late to go get Claire. He would have been tempted to do more than guard work, but she had to have at least one parent. Knocking on Kato and Anna's door he waited with a mostly dead expression on his face.

Anna had heard that Killian was released from the hospital today, but she didn't know if or when he would come for the baby. Eventually the knock sounded and she got up to get the door. She'd never seen him look like this before. "Come in." Blinking few times she almost felt like crying herself. "Got some extra food if you want?" Claire was busily thumping a carrot on the table and her little fist turned a white with her grip.

Silently Killian followed her to the table where Claire was sitting. The baby looked over and her little green eyes lit up as she squealed with delight and started to babble at her father. Killian clenched his jaw and nodded to Claire. He couldn't even manage to say anything for fear that he would break down again.
 
Kato put an arm around Anna's shoulders. He knew she and Star had been close. They talked at least every other day about babies and birthing and much more. Star had been so excited and now this? It wasn't right. "Killian...I'm so sorry." He truly was and it was all he knew to say. "If...if you need us to watch Claire a little bit longer. We can." He offers.
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Star sat in front of a metal plate which acted as a dull mirror and slowly pulled the bandage off her face. Her right eye was a bit blurry, but when she closed it she could see the damage the fire had done to her ear, chin and part of her cheek up to her eyebrow which had been mostly seared off. Her right arm too was covered in ugly red burns, much like the faded ones on her throat. These too would fade...not that it mattered anymore...the only person she loved was dead, she couldn’t imagine falling for another. Killian. She’d been crying non-stop for a week now. She couldn’t bring herself to accept he was gone forever, and yet she knew he was. "Even if his body survived this...he would be no more than a plant himself." The doctor had said. Killian… His strong hugs came to mind. His precious kisses, the way he held her so tenderly. The strength of his heartbeat, the smell of his clothing. She would never feel that from him again. The pain of that knowledge was still so overwhelming...she didn’t quite know what to do with it except cry and feel as if her heart was being ripped from her chest over and over.

She stared sullenly at her hand. His large dark hand hand once held hers so tenderly. They were going to grow old together and something as stupid as a seizure had to take him, and virus left her stranded. It wasn't right...it wasn't fair. She wanted to scream at the world but she was too tired from the endless weeping. And then there was Claire...her precious baby, alone, without her mother or father. Who was caring for her? Had Anna and Kato taken on the challenge. Maybe Lisa and Frank? Had she been given over to the chippequoti? Perhaps Sooni? Whomever had her, she prayed her baby was in safe hands. No matter what, she was going to find a way out of here.

Star swiped away the tears and turned as she heard footsteps behind her. Torwin held out a large bag to her and set it down. “To get you started. Tent, blanket, a change of clothes, some starting rations. From here on out you have to work for what you need, just like the rest of us.”
“How?” She asked wearily.
Even on this prison planet there was a hierarchy and separation of groups. There was a women's group Star had discovered, much like a harem with the woman protected by a giant (yet another species she didn’t know). They’d tried to get her to join them her 2nd day here but the requirements were unappealing and she immediately said no. There was the bloody hand...a group of the most violent and twisted individuals she’d ever met. They were constantly making trouble for the rest of the people here who banded together out of sheer necessity.

Leading this more peaceful group was Torwin, a former arena fighter as she soon discovered but a man with a family who just wanted to live the rest of his days in peace, even if it was in prison for speaking out against the nobles. Torwin was also the one to rescue her from the burning pod and house her until she could get her bearings. He had two children, Tess and Mark...twins...14 years old, born in the prison with no way out. Hell of a way to grow up. His wife Sara was a hardy woman and could hold her own when needed, but the beginnings of some disease had begun taking its toll on her. Star felt sorry for her and her family, knowing full well the pain of watching a loved one dying.

Torwin gestured for her to follow. Star stood, picked up the duffel bag and followed him. He led her to the edge of the town and barrier. There was a house right outside the shield. Built into the shield was a tiny hole through which prisoners were passing large brown bags. The person on the other side would take the bag, dump it into a bucket and after a moment hand him some credits. The person would then either take the credits or buy something right there. Clothes, shoes, rations.
“What are they giving the guy?” She questioned.
“Gems, coal, other minerals.” Torwin explained. “This is a rich mining planet. Its why the shield is so big. It goes on for miles with several areas to mine in. You fill a bag, you get credits, with the credits you can get the things you need to survive.” He pats her on the shoulder. “Good luck, lass.” He trots away.
“Wait...if we can buy supplies here, that means a supply ship must come by right?”
“Yes, every few months. But don’t even bother thinking about trying to escape on it. It stays on the other side of the shield and there is no way past.”
“Tunneling?”
“Tried it.”
“What about the pod...that got through.”
“One way. And it requires a special material to get through the shield. Most of which burns up during the entry through the shield to prevent one from getting back out.”
Special material...Chromium Triethylide...oh, Killian. Even now you’re still saving me from beyond the grave.
“Forget about trying to escape, lass. No one gets out.”
“I have a baby out there...she needs me. I have to get out. I’m not a convict!”
Torwin gives her a sympathetic look. “The sooner you accept that there is no escape, the sooner you can start making a new life for yourself here. Find a man who is relatively good to you and who will protect you.” He shrugs and leaves. But Star was not willing to give up. No matter the pain she was in...she couldn't give up. Her baby still needed her. I’m going to get out, Claire, no matter what it takes...I swear it.
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Thiza had her instructions. She wasn't sure why it was so important to the council that she become bonded to the cursed blood, but they promised her hearty compensation and promised that her bloodline would be strengthened by becoming his mate. She didn't feel right about stepping in during his hour of grief, but the council had ordered her. And what they commanded, she did. Thiza had dressed her best and held a basket with three days worth of meals under her arm. She knocked on Killian's door.
Getting up in the mornings was the one thing that Killian didn't do. He only got up long enough to feed Claire and then he went back to bed and let her play on the bed with him. Most of the time she would pull herself on top of him and drool all over his back. Hearing the knock he tipped to his side and the baby rolled off onto the bed and she giggled. Gathering Claire into his arms he walked to the door and pulled it open. "What are you here for?"
"Hello, Killian. I'm Thiza." She says with a soft sympathetic smile. "I know you are going through a difficult time right now...and I thought you could use some good homemade meals." She offered the basket staring at Claire who stared back with those bright green eyes. For a half-blood she was rather cute. "You have a very beautiful daughter."
A little shocked and not sure what to do he stared at the Chippeqouti woman. "Hmmm..." Stepping aside he let the woman come into the house. Walking back to his room he set Claire on the bed while he looked around for a shirt. Snatching one from the dresser he put it on and came back out. "Thank you for the food. Don't have much time to cook right now." He might if he got up earlier, but he was to embarrassed to admit that he needed help with the baby, cleaning, cooking, getting the ceremony set, and life in general.
She looked around at the mess the house was in. "I understand. Its a very stressful time after losing a mate, especially with a child involved. We chippequoti believe in helping our kin through grief, however we can. If you like I can watch your daughter from time to time...take one burden off your mind." Thiza offers kindly.
"Uh..." Killian frowned a little. "Umm....Whenever you have time that would be great. Just let me know." Realizing that he left the baby in the bedroom on the bed and Thiza was still holding the basket of food he glanced toward the kitchen and the heap that was too. "You know I uh...If you leave that I'll uh get it back to you. Got a few things to do this morning." Without even excusing himself he walked back to the room and grabbed Claire off the bed. He needed to remember where the baby thing was so he could strap her to himself.
When he came back out into the kitchen she had cleared a space on the table for the basket of food and set out one of the meals for him. She looked up at him. "I can watch her today if you need. I don't really have a job other than tending to my garden and selling the produce. Which gives me a lot of free time in between." She smiled kindly. "Please, sit...eat. Tell me if you like it. I can hold her while you do."
There had been a few Chippeqouti that weren't as hard headed about the bloodlines and it seemed she was one of them. So far she'd been probably the only one to say anything or even offer to help. Killian didn't want to admit it, but he was desperate. "Ok." He didn't even have the energy to argue with her. Sitting down he took a bite of the food and nodded. "Its very good. Thank you." He almost felt bad knowing how big of a mess everything was. "I might try to get the house taken care of if you take Claire for a few hours."
"Don't worry about the house. I can clean for you while I watch her. I'm sure there are needs far more urgent that you must attend too." Thiza replied knowingly. She held Claire on her hip like she'd done it before and the babe seemed content.
Killian wasn't sure what to do with an offer like that. "No, really I uh...I'd rather you didn't."
Thiza nodded. "Of course, how foolish of me. I'm a complete stranger holding your child. Forgive me." She looked down at Claire with a sad smile. "My baby had purple eyes. His name was Quent. He was beautiful too."
Pausing in the middle of his meal he frowned and looked up at her. "What happened to him if you don't mind my asking?"
Thiza looked up at him with the same pain he was experiencing. "The Bippens. My mate and child were killed during their last raid 9 months ago." She played with Claire's hair. "The pain never fully goes away...but...it does become bearable."
He felt a little like an ass now and Killian nodded. "Sorry to hear it. Must be a hard thing to offer to help. I'm sorry, just not much good at these kinds of things. If you would watch her for a bit I'd appreciate it." Pausing he shifted on the chair a little. "She still had some things out and I'd rather take care of that myself."
Thiza nodded. "Of course. I'll take care of your daughter as I would Quent."
Standing up he met her gaze. "Thank you." Killian had no idea of what else he could say. "If you need anything or help uh....let me know eh?"
"I will. Thankyou. But for now...focus on taking care of yourself. That is the most important thing if you are to heal."
Nodding a little he got up from the table. He still didn't have much of an appetite. "Um..Do you find it easier to watch her here or should I come pick her up later?" Whichever way didn't matter. Killian had already changed his mind and thought he would maybe finish putting together Star's ceremony.
"Claire is already used to this environment. It is best to watch her here where she is comfortable. If that is alright with you, of course."
It was a little uncomfortable, but Killian figured the woman was helping so he shouldn't complain about her methods. "That'll be fine. I might have to leave for a little this afternoon. Got a few things to take care of."
"She will be safe with me."

***
Dougal was waiting for Thiza when she got back to her house. "Well?" He asked coolly, arms crossed.
"I did as you said. Told him the story you wanted." She didn't look all that pleased.
"And?"
"And he felt sorry for me. Agreed to let me help him watch Claire and care for his home." She crossed her arms at him. "From now on, I do this my way. If he finds out I'm lying any trust I've built will be destroyed."
The council member nodded. "Just remember your purpose." Dougal tossed her a small pouch of chips. "For your troubles."
Thiza frowned down at the chips. It felt wrong taking credits for something like this, but she needed them anyway. She put them in the drawer and jerked her head towards the door. "Now get out of my home."
 
Anna was finally starting to show the baby. It was a good sized bump, but she still had about 3 months to go. "Oh my gosh I feel so fat." Sitting up in the bed she stared at her stomach. By now she was more comfortable spreading her legs when she sat so that her stomach could rest between them and the sides were supported by her thighs. "So wrong...For the whole first month and a half you couldn't tell and now I'm huge." More than likely he would just remind her that she was a tiny person. "I don't feel tiny when I've got a little whale hanging on the front of me. "

Grunting she scooted herself to the edge of the bed and let out a long sigh. "Jacob." Even if he wasn't out yet she was taking on motherly tones. "You'd better quit kicking mommy under the ribs." At least most of her pregnant symptoms had faded and she was in the last trimester. However, that was now traded out for a baby that seemed to think when she first got up in the morning he should be having a boxing match with her lungs. "Good lord." Standing up she almost made it to the bathroom and then he kicked her in the bladder. "What's the point!?" Throwing her hands in the air she looked back at Kato. "I only have a 2 ounce bladder and he insists on kicking it 3 mornings in a row now. Why don't I just get those adult diapers?" It didn't actually make her pee her pants, but she did get a drizzle from it and Anna found it very annoying. "Good thing I've got 50 pair of underwear." Mumbling she went into the bathroom and sat on the toilet. One of the drawers had been converted to a panty drawer because of this particular problem. Throwing the one pair into a heap on the floor she pulled out a fresh pair.

When she got back to the bed she grinned at Kato. It was his day off and she wanted to surprise him. Straddling him she leaned forward to kiss him only to find that her stomach was in the way. "You know this used to work better." She also noticed that her cleavage was significantly more impressive. "I think that having bigger boobs is perhaps the one bonus." By now it seemed he had either gotten very good at hiding his embarrassment or he was used to her random statements. "You know what I really want?" Sighing she looked down at him and giggled. "I want watermelon and salt."

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If it hadn't been for Thiza's help Killian wouldn't have made it through all his planning for the ceremony. The Chip had cleaned the house anyway and she handed over a happy smiling baby for the days leading up to the ceremony. Star had a beautiful tombstone and it didn't cost too much. Not that he would have cared about the cost. Only had the next 100 years to pay off the debt.

Frank, Lisa, Kato, Anna, and Thiza were the only people that Killian had actually asked to attend. It was all the more he could muster and anyone else that showed up was a bonus. Killian only had one song play quietly in the back ground while folks took a seat. There was a surprising number of folk that turned up. Many of them had something nice to say, but he didn't know what to say. Instead Killian waited till they had all gone home and sat down with Claire to stare at the tombstone. At least it was a nice day. Now while he was alone with the baby he quietly reminded himself of a few of his favorite memories. If he didn't perfect the memory now it might be lost.

It had been almost a month since Star went missing and still he couldn't feel right about Star's ship exploding so he went and got the last known coordinates from the council. Since it was only a day or two out he could take himself looking. Then it occurred to him that maybe Thiza would want to come if they stopped at one of the other planets. Sometimes the goods were cheaper and if she was alone like himself she could get lonely. Besides there were enough rooms for her to have her own and he wanted to do something nice for her after all she'd done for him. When he got through the door of his home Thiza had a meal ready and Claire was sitting down eating already. "I wanted to ask you a question before you leave." Killian took a breath and started. "I'm going off planet for about 2 days. If I stopped at one of the trading stations would you want to come?"

Thiza's eyes widened slightly. "Really!?" She asked hopefully.

"I-I uh...Well I don't have any other way to thank you." Nervously he met her gaze. "It wouldn't be for you to watch Claire. I can do that in the navigation room. Got that ship and you might as well have a chance to trade or buy something off the planet after all you've done to help."

"I've never been to a trading station. I'd love to see one for myself. What are they like?"

A slight smirk came to his face. "Like nothing else. Packed with vendors. Black market dealers if you know where to look. Even a few that sell dresses." He'd noticed she didn't have much for dresses and he was thinking if he traded a few things he could get on for her.

Thiza smiled genuinely. Until the raid, she'd never left the planet. And now this strong blood was inviting her, a simple average blood to go visit a brand new place. He wasn't acting how she'd imagined he would. "When do we leave?"

"Tomorrow morning. I'll probably leave about half before the sun is up." Killian still felt a little guilty about taking her when it should have been Star. Star was dead and there wasn't anything he could do about that. Besides, Thiza had been awfully good to him and he owed her something. "That too early for you?"

"No, not at all. I look forward to it." Thiza poured some more fresh peas onto Claire's plate. She grabbed a fist full stuffing them in her mouth.

Taking his usual seat at the table he noticed how Claire was shoving her little face full of food. The child had seemed to adjust fairly well though she still whimpered at night and he'd taken to just putting her on the bed next to him so he could sleep more and she would cry less. "Claire is...she seems to be doing well. I was a little worried about her. Most humans wouldn't want her and seemed there were a lot of Chippeqouti that thought even less of her. Means a lot to me that you treat her good."

"A child is a child, half-blood or no. Cursed or no. Honestly, I'm still uncertain how I feel about her origins...but, times are changing. Perhaps the chippequoti should as well."

Killian shook his head. "I can't do anything about my parents choices." A sad smirk came to his face. "Her mother wasn't too certain about having a baby with me. You wouldn't have been the only one to wonder about her origins."

"If she was uncertain, then why did she? If...I may ask."

"Decided we liked each other before I found out I was Chippeqouti and then the baby was an accident."

"That's right. I remember hearing something about you being raised with humans. You never suspected you were something different?" Thiza asked curiously.

Killian shook his head. "No...The whore promised not to say anything to me. Didn't even know my last name. Soon as I could walk and run I lived on my own. Nobody ever said I was different so...just figured I was a big kid."

"How strange. I cannot imagine growing up with humans." She shook her head. "I am proud to be chippequoti. We are...we were a once proud and mighty race. Even the gillicks feared and respected us. Now...we are nothing. A handful of remnant desperately trying to get back to the way were before." Thiza shook her head softly.

"Yeah." Killian stared at the table for a moment. "Not much to do about it now. Never did like the Bippens or Gillicks myself."

Thiza wiped Claire's face then began picking up the dishes. She'd been doing little chores here and there. Cleaning the dishes. Sweeping and mopping the floors, typically while Killian was out having to do things. She finished the current set of dishes then ruffled Claire's hair. "I will see you in the morning, Killian." She nods her head to him.

Early the next morning he got up and he barely had the engines running when Thiza walked up. She was on time and he was grateful for that. Killian would have waited if she was late just because she had been kind. He had managed to pull himself together enough to clean up the kitchen after she left. Claire was more than happy to be strapped to him. "Make yourself comfortable. " Pointing to any of the seats in the crew room he then went to the navigation room and brought up the panels for scanning. He could run scans the entire trip there and back. Maybe he would get something.

There wasn't anything on the trip there or on the way back. Killian knew he wouldn't find anything and yet he was disappointed. Still he planned the stop like he promised Thiza. The dress he figured he would save for later. If he was going to consider anyone in the future as a mother for Claire she was the one. So far the woman was quite remarkable. She still had many of the same concerns, but at least she was good to Claire and the baby didn't cry if he left her with Thiza and Claire was gaining weight. It would just take some time to feel comfortable enough to ask Thiza if she would consider him as a potential partner. When they arrived home he walked her back to her house and then returned to the ship to take a few of the little things he got for her to put away. They could go in little hatches in his room and when the time was right he would bring it out.
 
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Thiza had never had so much fun as she did wandering around the station with Killian. It was incredible just how many species were represented here and all the different vendors. The amount of variety was overwhelming. She didn't buy much. Just a few trinkets here, a treat there, a doll for Claire that would withstand her teething. As they headed home he watched his demeanor get more and more sullen. She'd noted the scans he'd done. He'd been looking for her. She sympathized. While she may not have lost a mate or a baby, she could imagine the pain. Though...she found it strange how a human had managed to so thoroughly grip his heart. It wasn't like she was going to live very long anyway.

As Killian dropped her off at her home Thiza handed Claire back to him. The babe whimpered and began crying, clearly wanting Thiza to keep holding her. "I had a wonderful time, Killian. Thankyou for sharing that experience with me." She leaned forward and gave him a soft kiss on the cheek. "Have a good night. I'll see you tomorrow."

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Star was dying. She could feel it. Dying emotionally as each new day passed without Killian or Claire. Every night she cried, the absence of Killian beside her so massive and so painful. She hadn't even been able to bury him. Every day it was a battle just to get out of bed and work the mines, scrounging for a few petty chips. She was also dying physically. Lack of food, water and basic essentials were running their toll on her body. She stared at the bag of minerals she’d mined, torn between selling them for essentials like food or starving yet another day so that she could process them and get the desperately needed material from them for her escape. 3/4ths of what she mined held the Chromite. The other 4th was random gems and minerals that gave her 5- 10 chips depending on what she got. She needed at least 15 chips for two meals (a day’s ration). She needed another 30 chips a week for essential living. Fresh water, another blanket, medicine for wounds, vitamins to keep her body strong and healthy, soap for bathing, womanly essentials and other things. She’d be stuck here for years if she had to sell the majority of what she mined rather than being able to use it herself. But...if she didn’t get more chips...she was going to starve to death, or freeze to death, or die of a disease from lack of basic needs. It was a horrible trade-off.

A woman passed by her tent and peered in at Star. “Hey, new girl.” She raised an eyebrow at Star. Star thought her accent sounded French. “You don’t look so good. You have...say...sickness? Eh? Probably from doing a man’s work. You should join me and my sisters. Plenty of work to go around.” The woman knelt at the tent entrance as Star tried to ignore the prostitute. Every week it seemed someone else was trying to get her to join them. But her heart was loyal to Killian.
“Is it true that you were a lover to a black chip?”
Star looked up at her. She’d only told a handful of people that her husband had been a chippequoti. “Yes. Why?”
The woman shrugged and smiled lightly. “There are many a lonely black chip looking for a good lover. Most of us...we say...uh..too nervous to go near them. You could have a whole clientele to yourself, no? 15 chips an hour, maybe more for alien, hmm? No more working those dirty mines...no more being sick or hungry. Good, yes?”
Star’s eyes widened. 15 chips an hour!? The men were paying that much here just for an hour of sex? It was tempting...but she couldn’t imagine doing that to herself or to the memory of Killian.
“Thankyou, for the offer...but, I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“I’m a one man type of gal.”
The prostitute gives her a sad smile. “Is good when you are in real world, yes? But this is hell...why make it harder than it is, no? Better to have fun and get money. Think about it. Come see me or giant if you change your mind, yes? He protect you.” The woman stood and left. Star stared back down at the bag of rocks that were barely making her 5 chips despite 7 hours of hard labor.
It wouldn’t technically be cheating. He’s gone now...and there’s nothing I can do about it.
Even when it was hard in the gangs I never resorted to that…
But there had been other ways to make money then. Here its just the mines or prostitution. And Killian would want me to get back to Claire as quickly as possible.
Star rubbed her face hard and stood up, taking the bag with her. Maybe she’d be able to think a bit more clearly with some food in her belly. It would put her back, selling everything she’d gathered but if she didn’t get the essentials, she would die before being able to escape.

Star left her tent, crossing the road towards the shop at the edge of the barrier. She hear some loud shuffling behind and turned to look just in time to see a group of Bloody Hand tearing down her tent and stealing what precious few supplies she had, including the box of Chromite she’d been painstakingly collecting.. “HEY!” She dropped the bag and raced after the man with the box. She tackled him, hitting him the nose hard. He fought back, shoving her off and jumping to his feet in time to knee her in the before she could get back up herself. Star’s head flew back, the shock to her head stunning her for a moment. The thief picked up the box and rushed away with it. “No!” She scrambled to her feet only to be grabbed from behind. Two powerful arms wrapped around her chest. A second came at her from the front. She kicked off the ground, smashing her heel into the attacker before her and throwing her head back to try and headbutt the one holding her. He’d wisely been keeping his head back and simply tightened his crushing hug. She gasped as all the air seemed to shoved out of her lungs. His grip on her lungs kept her from drawing breath, and her ribs felt about ready to give out.

He suddenly released her and she dropped to the ground, gasping for air. She turned her head in time to see the giant (an alien built like a human but 9 feet tall) smash the head of her attacker in. She doubted he’d ever be getting up again. Star stared up at the giant in fear. He was the same one who “protected” the girls in his prostitution ring. He crouched down and offered her a massive hand up. Star didn’t take it, not wanting to give him any ideas. She stood slowly, brushing off her clothes and looking around in horror. They’d taken everything. Her tent, clothes, what few essentials she had, the box of chromite that she’d spent the last month gathering. Star almost gave up right there. Another day of mining without food was ahead of her. She’d have to start gathering the metal from scratch again and...she had to find a way to make enough to replace her essentials.

As if sensing her depressed thoughts the giant looked down at her sympathetically. “I protect everyone who works for me. Your things will never be stolen, you’ll never be attacked, and you don’t have to sleep with any man you don’t want too.”
Star glared up at him. “I’m not a prostitute. I have...had a husband. I have a baby...I’m not that sort of person.”
“And what sort of person is that?”
“Someone who sells their body for a few chips. No matter how hard this all is.”
The giant raised an eyebrow at her. “What’s wrong with it?”
“Its not right...its not moral.” Star shook her head.
The giant scoffs and points to where her tent used to be. “You don’t live in a place where morals matter anymore. You do what you have to in order to survive. There is no shame in that.” He gestured for her to follow him. “Let me show you something.”
Star followed reluctantly towards the other end of the village where a group of little homes had been built together in a makeshift village of just the women. The french woman who had talked to her earlier smiles and waves.
“My women are safe and happy.”
“There is nothing happy about selling yourself.” Star growls.
“No?” He pushed open the door to one of the homes. It almost looked like a home. There was an actual mattress and table. There was food on the table and a small fire pit in the middle of the room keeping it warm. At least five different outfits hung on hooks on the walls and the place smelled clean and fresh. Star gaped.
“This could be yours.” The giant says. “For three-five hours a week to start, you could have all this. 10 chips an hour go to you for whatever you want or need.”
It was tempting, Star had to admit...so tempting. But...Killian...her heart was still bound to him. He’s dead. He’s not coming to rescue you. Claire is waiting.
Star suddenly turned away, her heart pounding. She felt sick just even considering it. Like she betraying herself, betraying Killian. Killian...how she missed him. Missed his touch, his love. His protection and comfort. She could never sleep with another man while he still held such a grip on her heart.
“How about this. Work for me for one week. See how it goes. You can stay in one of these nice homes, have all the food you want. Only take the men you choose.”
Star looks up at the giant and shook her head. “I can’t. Please stop asking. Tell your girls to stop asking.”

Star walked away, hugging herself. She needed help...but she didn’t want to get it from there. She walked to the far end of the town and knocked on Torwin’s door. The tired man opened it. She felt guilty. Here she was about to ask for help and he had a wife and two children to care for. “I’m sorry...I...the hand...they took everything...I need help.”
Torwin shook his head at her. “I’m so sorry, Star. But, I have a family to provide for. You understand.”
Star nodded. “Yeah, yeah...I understand. Sorry for bothering you.”
He shut the door and she turned away. She wept as she walked back to the mine. Killian...killian what do I do. I wish you here. I miss you so badly. I need you so much. I wish you weren’t dead...Killian.
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Kato chuckled at Anna as she tried to straddle him only to have Jacob get in the way. It was comical to say the least. He'd long since gotten over his shyness with her. At least when they were alone. He'd even caught her off guard one or two times by the things he whispered in her ear when he was feeling more bold. "Watermelon, huh? I am pretty sure that watermelons are out of season, but we have some frozen berries in the freezer. I could make you a smoothie and sprinkle salt on that." He offers.
"Noo.." Anna wrinkled her nose. "That's gross. I'd rather have a peanut butter blueberry smoothie."
Kato grimaced then chuckled. "Ok, I can do that, but..." He looked down at his body still trapped beneath her.
"What?" Anna loomed over him and grinned. Then she realized her position and she giggled. "Hmmm... Yeah I guess I'll move."
"Unfortunately." Kato sighed and helped her off. He walked her to the kitchen and began getting the smoothie put together when he noted the tall cylinder shaped present on the table. "Oh, right...Killian brought that over yesterday. He found it in Star's things. Looks like a birthday present. A month late but..." He finished the smoothie, poured it in a glass and brought it over to Anna as she opened the cylinder and tilted it. Out slid a roll of what looked like a metallic film. He helped hold it up and let it unroll. It was in the shape of a window and an image of a moving waterfall flickered to life. "Wow, she got you one of those virtual windows!" He slide his hand across the screen and image changed to a jungle scene.
Anna stared at the cylinder on the table. "Really?" She was a little surprised that he even got out of the house long enough to do something besides hide away and take care of Claire. Pulling the wrapping paper off of the cylinder she tilted it to the side and Kato explained it to her. "I've never seen one before. That's pretty neat though. Should we put it in the baby's room? Got that jungle scene and all."
"Why not?" Kato helped her stick it to the window already in the bedroom. It was solar powered so as long as it was getting light, it wouldn't run out of battery. He put a hand around her waist as they looked at it. "How are you doing?" He asked...the tone hinted that he was asking how she was doing emotionally with her friend's death.
Sighing she shrugged her shoulders. "I still find it hard. I'm not used to being all alone every day. We would get together and talk about the babies and family. Used to laugh about the things that our husbands did or said. Then when she was lonely I would go over to her house and hang out. Claire liked to play with my necklaces and sometimes star would come here and we'd set up a spot on the floor for Claire to play. I miss her."
Kato nodded. "As do I...she was good woman. Deserved better." He sighed softly and looked down at her. "How's the smoothie? Did I make it right?"
She glanced at Kato and had to bite her tongue. It didn't make any difference now. At least he changed the subject. "Smoothie is pretty good. I might add a dash of salt and cinnamon."
Kato shook his head. "I'm convinced that half of these cravings are you just messing me." He teased.
"Seriously it needs salt and cinnamon." Getting up she wandered to the cupboard to get the seasonings and she sprinkled both of them on top and then mixed it with the spoon vigorously. Taking a sip she closed her eyes. "Mmmmm..." Passing it over to Kato she wiggled her eyebrows up and down. "Now you try that and tell me what you think. It's divine now."
Kato pushed it back to her. "Sorry, honey...I love you...but there is nothing divine about your odd cravings."
"You didn't even taste it!" Anna pushed it back toward him. "You must taste before you criticize."
He pushed it back. "I dislike peanut butter...very much."
"Are you allergic?" Anna frowned. "What kind of manners are you going to teach Jacob."
"Allergic? No...I just don't like peanut butter. And I think I was very polite in my refusal." He chuckles and shakes his head at her. "I can't believe we're seriously having a conversation about whether or not your smoothie is good. We have to be the oddest couple in the galaxy."
"Well you might end up with a very polite picky eater for a baby then." Anna raised her eyebrows slightly when he laughed about their conversation. "I'm being serious."
"I know...that's whats hilarious." He leaned forward and kissed her then grimaced. "Ooh, peanut butter breath...."
Anna couldn't see what he found so funny about it. Since he was coming in for a kiss she let him, but made sure to exhale a little more than usual so he could get a whiff of her breath. "Mhmmm and I'll breath it on you all morning."
Kato made a face. "You do I'm losing the peanut butter and we won't have any until the next supply run." He warned half-teasingly.
"But I love peanut butter." Anna made a small face. "I'd ask Killian to get some for me , or Thiza. She might get some if she goes on one of those runs with him. He goes almost every other week for 2 days."
He sighed and put his head on his hand while he stared at her. "You're pretty adorable when you're pregnant, you know that?"
"You're just saying that. I got a giant belly and ridiculous boobs. I feel like an over sized water balloon." Sitting back in her seat she sucked at the shake and stared at Kato. "So lucky you don't have to grow a baby inside your guts."
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Four Months Separated:

Star shuffled wearily over to the store and handed the man a partly filled bag through the tiny window in the shield. She'd cut her hair short in a fit of fury a few weeks back, so now just a few longer strands sometimes hung down in her eyes. Her body was well muscled from the hours of hard work and the burn scars on her face and arms were fading. Every time she caught her own reflection she was startled by the dead look in her eyes and the mean looking scar over her eye. She wasn't very pretty anymore, not that she cared. The store manager poured the bag out into the weighing bucket, pulling out the gems which she would be paid for separately. “9 chips. Supplies?” He asked dully.
“How many credits do I have?” She asked.
He looked up her name. “Eh, 17 now.”
Star hung her head. There were so many things she still needed. Four months here and she was just barely managing to stay alive. She needed another blanket and jacket with winter coming over the planet. The shield had protected them from the freezing rain but it was still getting colder. But she also needed to eat. What she was losing in body weight she was gaining in muscle from the constant work in the mines, but she still needed some fat on her bones. “A ration pack and jug of water.”
That left her with one chip left in her account. He passed them through the tiny window in the shield and she walked off to find a private spot to eat some much needed nourishment. From here she could see the prostitute camp. Would it really be so horrible? She was in desperate need. Killian...he was dead. He couldn’t take care of her anymore. She had to survive. Not only did she have to survive, she had to mine as much at that Chromite as she could so she escape and get home to Claire. A third raid on her tent by the hand had set her back several months...again. She couldn't stand it anymore. She needed to do something. Star finished the meager meal and downed half the jug of water. She was far too tired to go back to the mines today. But if she didn’t work, she wouldn’t get to eat tomorrow and she would simply become weaker.

She finally stood and slowly made her way down to the camp, her heart pounding. Killian...forgive me...but you’re dead...and I have to survive. Please don’t haunt me. I’m doing this for Claire. For our baby. She needs her mother. You would understand...you did worse to get back to me. Somehow that thought encouraged her...just a little bit. I will forever love you. Nothing will ever change that. Ever.
 
Anna woke up in the middle of the night. She was so big by now that she couldn't even sit up without rolling to her side first. Her body had been a little crampy lately and when she sat up it felt like she just wet the bed. "Seriously!" Hissing to herself she got her legs moved over the edge of the bed and she felt the water still running as she waddled for the bathroom and it was way more than what her bladder usually carried. "Oh crap." It finally occurred to her what was going on and she waddled back over to the bed and shook Kato's shoulder. "We're having the baby. So we doing this here at home or in the hospital?" Anna rested a hand under her stomach and shook her head when he moved over in the bed. "Ummm no....Don't move there. My water broke partly in bed."

The two of them rushed to the hospital considering some of her earlier complications with the pregnancy. Only a few hours in and Anna was already sweating. It was the hardest work she'd ever done in her life and pushing didn't seem to be enough. Wincing a little she looked at Kato. He almost looked worried. "Oh my gosh this baby is so big." Scooting herself up on the bed she pushed again and let out a long breath afterword. "How many hours more?"

Eventually she was dilated to ten and still her pushing was not productive. Anna laid back in the bed and groaned. She could hear him telling her to push and no matter how hard she pushed there was nothing. The baby just wasn't coming. By mid morning Anna was exhausted and she pushed a little harder till she heard an excited yelp. "Ok I'll push again." Grunting a little she pushed harder and gripped the side rails of the bed. If Kato wasn't the doctor she would have insisted that he stand at her head so he didn't see what was happening down there.

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The trips to the other planets had turned less and less into searches and more about just getting away. Killian never found anything and he made dozens of searches. He even made inquiries about her on planets and nobody had heard of her, or met her. Finally it as 4 months later and he had to accept that she was gone. It was time to move on for Claire's sake. She still loved it when he held her, but she wanted Thiza more and more. It wasn't too surprising since the child was practically being raised by her.

Stopping by the grave site Killian stared at the tombstone for a while. Letting out a sigh he finally moved on his way home. Thiza probably had a meal on like usual. Stepping into the house it was still painful and especially tonight. He had to move on and it was still feeling so early. The two were at the table and Thiza was helping feed Claire. "I'll wash my hands up and be out in a minute." Walking into his room he stepped into the bathroom and stared at himself in the mirror. He was going to have to do this. Couldn't expect her to take care of Claire like this all the time and not do something about it. Either he would have to make her more than a friend or find a way to pay her. Thiza had become a friend of his and he wanted to do what was right by her. Before heading out to the kitchen he dug into one of his hiding spots and pulled a box out. It was long and flat'ish. Setting the box on the edge of the table he pulled his chair out and sat down.

"Thiza, I had a question for you." Killian waited for a long moment. Now that she paused her feeding the baby he began. "You've been a good friend and I wanted to know if you could possibly consider me as more than a friend. I would like for us to see how it might work out if I..." It was hard just to get this far. He didn't know if he'd ever get over losing Star. "Forgive me if I seem hesitant. You're a fine woman and I admire you. If there is anyone I would be willing to try this with again it would be you."

"Oh..." Thiza blinked at him. She hadn't expected him to begin falling for her so quickly, if at all. She could almost hear Dougal's grating voice in her skull, telling her not to mess this up. She put on a smile, honestly flattered. "I would like that, Killian. Whenever you feel you are ready...I'll be here."

Killian nodded and handed the box to her. "It's for you. Thought we could go to one of the planets together and have a dinner. I'll be gone for a week, but when I come back then we can go." He'd worked extra to get the week off and have it backed up to his 2 days off. For the week he planned to search the planets and all the surrounding area for Star. Killian needed one last trip to assure himself that she wasn't out there. Before he moved forward he needed to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that she hadn't somehow survived.

Thiza opened the box, her eyes widening in surprise. "Killian...this...this is..." Never in her life had she been given a dress as beautiful as this. Chips always dressed in their class...this, was beyond her class. "It's beautiful." She says in awe. Here she was supposed to be winning him over and he was winning her over. "Thank you...I think this is the loveliest gift anyone has ever given me."

Nodding a little he barely looked at her. "I'm glad you like it." Even the smile he attempted was weak at best. "Sure you're not exaggerating?" He couldn't imagine if she had a man before that he didn't treat her to a beautiful dress.

"I'm sure..." She says. "In Chippequoti culture, everyone wears clothing according to their class. This...this at least two levels above my class."

He rolled his eyes. "Damn the classes. I never cared one way or another."

"That's cause you weren't raised in them." Thiza chuckled. "For the purpose of blood, they matter. But this is still quite beautiful, and I can't wait to wear it at our dinner."

"Good." Killian glanced at her and then turned to start eating. "Thank you again." She was always taking care of him and doing little things for himself or Claire that he didn't think of. If she could accept that she wasn't his first love then they might have something to work with. By the end of the night he helped her clean the dishes and held Claire while they walked back to her house. "I'll see you in a week then. Going to take Claire with me."

Early the next morning Killian packed Claire's little bag to go and he stuffed her into the front carrier so she could hang on his chest. Then he packed a bag for himself. Walking out to his ship he saw the lights on at Thiza's. Maybe she was up and maybe she was one of those that always left a light on. He couldn't remember. Killian decided to search a long ways out of the usual scope and as far out as he could get. Eventually he came to a planet where someone recalled a ship exploding, but even the escape pod had been on fire and they reported there had been no chance of survivors. Killian went back into his ship even more heavy hearted than he had been in the past searches. If that was her ship that he heard about she hadn't even been close to making it. Even if she had been on the pod and it hadn't ejected prematurely she would have been burnt to death or so severely burned she would have died.

The last night that he had to himself he put Claire in her little crib and moved it to a different room so he could cry. Months of searching and nothing only to get some information that was maybe her and maybe not. So close and still nothing. Even when he fell asleep he had the dreams about the games and they had changed. Instead he was protecting Star. At least trying to. By the end of the game he had to make the same choices and he hated it the same as always. "Hide her. Hold Claire and I'll protect you." He was going to crawl with her to the edge of the games and she could sneak out the gate. He needed to get her out. Then the sniper found a way to shoot her anyway. "No!" Killian sat up in his bed with sweat pouring down his face. He'd finally found a way to save her in the games and he didn't have to kill her, but they got her anyway. Even his mouth felt dry and he went to the bathroom where he kept a cup in the medicine cabinet to rinse his mouth out. Almost shaking he took himself back to bed and the whole dream played over and over.

By morning he was exhausted, but he got cleaned up and got Claire fed before heading to the planet to pick up Thiza. She would have time to change on the ship if she wanted. When he landed he took a few minutes to make the extra bed for her. Killian then packed the baby to the front of himself and walked to Thiza's house to get her. Knocking on the door he waited for an answer.

Thiza came out with a shy smile, a pretty shirt and pants and a small overnight bag. "Hello, Killian." She had a flush in her cheeks. "And hello Claire." She chuckled as the babe reached for her. "I'm ready."

"Hi." Smiling a little he noticed that Claire was already trying to reach for Thiza. "How about you take her and I'll grab the bag. She was missing you all week."

"Aw, I was missing her too." Thiza readily did the switch and took Claire in arms, kissing the baby's face and drawing out happy laughs. "And I missed you." She took his free hand, giving it a light squeeze and offering her cheek a if hinting that she wouldn't turn down a kiss he felt so inclined to give her one. While this had all started as a shame she was rapidly beginning to fall for him.

Killian stiffened slightly when she slipped her hand into his. He had to remind himself that this was a natural part of how these things went. Glancing at Thiza he saw her cheek and he gave her a gentle peck on the cheek before turning his gaze ahead. "I uh...Thought of you a few times while I was away." It was about as honest as he could get since if he missed anyone it was Star and he still had mixed feelings about Thiza though he was trying very hard for Claire's sake.

She gave him a sympathetic smile as if sensing his hesitation. "So, where are you taking me for our dinner?"

"There's a quiet little place that looks out over the ocean. Got a reservation for the balcony so we can hear the waves." Killian did smile a little at that thought. Sounded like a good place to go.

"I can't remember the last time I visited an ocean. I'm looking forward to it." Thiza smiled.

Killian quietly nodded and took her aboard the ship. The afternoon went quickly and when she wasn't in the navigation room even though he'd told himself he wouldn't he turned the scanners on. Same as when he'd made passes before there was nothing. When they finally landed he gathered Claire into his arms and offered his free arm to Thiza. "You look beautiful." This time he kissed her on the cheek a little more naturally and he smiled at her. "Ready?"

"Yes!" She says eagerly, taking his arm. The purple dress fit perfectly, accentuating her figure in all the best ways. She held herself with the dignity of a queen, head high and smile bold. She was merely an inch shorter than Killian, matching his stature and her hands weren't all that much smaller either. Thiza couldn't but think how much of a better fit she was for Killian than the little human had been. She smiles up at Killian as he seats her and she helps make sure Claire was secure in the baby-chair. She 'wow'd' at the ocean, the sun sparkling off its blue-green surface. "Can we walk the sands after dinner?" She asked hopefully.

Once they were seated he smiled at the expression on Thiza's face. She was impressed an that was what he wanted. "Walking the beach is a perfectly logical thing to do. Why else would we eat here?" Chuckling a little he ordered a drink for himself and made sure it was alcoholic. He wanted to drink something that would help put his mind at ease.

"Are beaches one of your favorite environments?" She asked as she waited for a glass of champagne.

Killian shrugged. "Not my favorite, have fond memories of a beach though. Are they one of your favorites?" He wanted to get away from the bitter sweet that a beach was and he wondered why he would have picked the location besides the fact that it was calm and pretty.

"No, though it is gorgeous. I am fond of the deserts on Quoti. Rolling blue, red and pink hills that stretch for miles. There is a beautiful harshness about them that you will find nowhere else, except perhaps in the people themselves."

"Hmmm." A thoughtful look came to his face and he took a deep breath. "Then this is to making new memories." Lifting his glass he clinked it against hers and had a sip.

"New memories." She nodded and sipped her champagne.

Killian walked the shores with Tiza after dinner. Claire was asleep and he had her tucked against himself with one arm. Gold sand occasionally flipped up from Tiza's heels and it contrasted against her purple dress. She was a beautiful woman and he was almost tempted to invite her to his room for the night. Still something held him back and he felt too guilty. It was probably too much too fast. Given some time he may feel differently about it. For now he wanted to take it slowly. Walking back to the ship he stopped with Tiza outside her bedroom door and carefully placed one hand on her hip. He only had to tilt his head ever so slightly to kiss her and this time it was real kiss not just a peck on the cheek. "Goodnight." Slowly dropping his hand from her hip he took himself and Claire back to his room.

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It was only 2 months since the baby was born. Anna could hold Jacob now and she only had to give him little supplements to make up for her breast milk not quite being enough. At least it wasn't as bad as it had been for Star. Jacob was only 1/4 Chippeqouti because of Kato's transplant and as a result the baby had bright eyes and only a tint of dark color to his skin. "Such a beautiful boy." Nuzzling her nose with his she grinned. "Should we go for a walk today while daddy is at work? Hmmmm?" Picking him up she heard him giggle a little and she grinned back at him. "Ok lets go."

Anna wanted to take a chance to visit Thiza. Perhaps the woman would prove to be friendly. Sooni had been strangely absent of late and Anna didn't know why. There were a lot of strange events and she wasn't quite positive how they were connected yet. After the visit with Thiza she could go home and pack a quick lunch to take to Kato at work. Without Witteck he had to work more and she was afraid he would get sick or catch some virus like he had before. What they really needed was another doctor for the people. Specifically the Humans as it seemed that the Chippeqouti doctor was rarely if ever needed and Kato had been teaching her a little more about human bodies. No matter though...a division was growing between the Chips and Humans. Often they only wanted to see their doctors and it was becoming taxing on Kato.
 
“The baby is coming!?” Kato reached over to touch her in the dark but Anna stopped her, warning about the flood on her side of the bed. He stripped the sheets and put them to wash while they were in the ship’s med-bay. He called Shanti to cover for him for the next day or so while took care of Anna. He made her as comfortable as possible and talked her through each stage of the birthing process, completely calm and almost seemingly at ease, for the first few hours. But her labor was long and hard...much longer that it should have been and he was starting to get concerned. By mid-morning he was seriously considering performing a C-section when Jacob’s head finally crested.
“Ah! There he is!” Kato exclaimed. “Alright, Anna. Go ahead and push again, let’s get him out.” He gently coaxed the head, then the shoulders out. From there he was able to just pull the rest of the baby out gently. “Beautiful, Anna! You were amazing.” He laughs as he cuts and ties off the umbilical cord. He wiped the little boy off as best he could then wrapped Jacob in a soft towel and handed him to Anna, hovering close by. “He’s so beautiful.” He kissed her sweaty forehead, not caring in the least. “You are so beautiful. We are going to be an amazing family.”

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“Thankyou, doll. Always fun with you.” One of the men slipped a credit chip into Star’s hand as he kissed her again, groping her one more time before exiting her little hovel. Star smiled until the door closed, then the masquerade fell and her shoulders slumped. She pulled the pot of warming water off the fire. Grabbing a bar of soap and a rag she scrubbed every inch of her body, as if that would wash away the most current violation of her heart and body. It never worked. Even months later she still always felt sick after every time. Sick and ashamed. More than once she’d held a knife to her wrist just wanting it to end. But then she remembered Claire...precious Claire...she couldn’t leave her baby alone.

Star looked down at her hands as they began trembling again. What would Killian have thought of her now? Would he still have loved her if he knew what she was doing? Would any man want her now when they found out? Stop thinking about him. He’s dead. I’m not. I have to survive. Star finished the bath and pulled on a warm pair of sweats before grabbing her pickaxe and bag and trudging out to the mines. The other women didn’t understand why she would do take men here and then head off to the mines to work some more. They would could never understand her madness. The madness of a grief stricken mother, trapped in a prison she couldn’t escape...yet. They didn’t know the pain that drove her everyday. The pain that came with loving someone so deeply you would do anything to get back to them.

Star mined away at the rocks and the chromite in silence. Ignoring the booty calls of former or future customers around her the majority of which had ended up being chips as she was one of the few who wasn’t frightened to entertain them. The constant clink of metal chipping against rock had almost become a close friend. It was a rhythm she could lose herself in. Her mind focused so that she didn’t have to think about the humiliation and shame that came with the next customer, or the guilt and pain of Claire waiting for her, or the grief and agony of Killian’s stupid face constantly appearing randomly in her mind. Sometimes though, her mind would wander. She would remember how they had met, how he’d first tried to kiss her, that beautiful dress, his caring for her in her weakest moments… “BUT WHERE ARE YOU NOW!?” She suddenly screamed hitting the pickaxe against the rock so hard it nearly broke. Several of the other prisoners looked at her curiously before going back to their work. You’re dead...that’s where you are. You and your stupid beautiful face. You’re dead. I’m trapped here and you’re too dead to save me. “STOP HAUNTING ME!” She fell to her knees, sobbing. You promised you’d never leave me. Never. Stupid, Lying Idiot! I HATE YOU! Why did you leave me!? Star’s hands clutched the dirt as fat tears flooded her eyes and began to moisten the earth. “Why…” She wailed. Why did I have to fall in love with you only to have this happen? Stop haunting me, stop condemning me. I hate myself enough as it is...but I have to survive. Star took several shaky breaths before pushing back up onto her feet. Her hands trembled badly as she took the axe back into her hands to resume her work. None of it matters...my baby won’t even know me. Star shook her head trying to push the depression aside long enough to focus. She had to get out. She had to get back to Claire. She lifted the pickaxe. Clink...clink...clink...It didn’t take too long for her to become lost in the rhythm again, her mind holding onto the sound, her last little life-line keeping her from falling into the sea of despair that always lingered.

Star stopped a little after mid-day and made her rounds to the other miners, exchanging the Chromite stones they mined for gems and other stones that she had. They didn’t understand why she would exchange valuable gems for some mineral stones but it meant more chips for them so they readily exchanged them. Pretty soon her bag was full, and she hiked with it for a mile to a smelter that she’d built herself. No one ever followed her this far. If they did, she took a detour and sat staring at nothing until they got bored and left. She poured the rocks into the processor and began the hot work of melting it and filtering it until just the metal itself remained. Star then took that hot metal and poured it straight onto bent sheet of metal (salvaged from her pod) that would act as her shield as she passed through the barrier. It only covered a small portion of the shield, as always, but it was one more portion covered. In a couple more months the entire shield would be ready...then, she would be going home.

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It had taken several months of persistence and guile but Sooni had finally worked her way into the inner circle of the council. She’d learned quickly that Kavis didn’t trust any Chippequoti who “fraternized” with the humans more than necessary. As such she’d been forced to pull away from her human friends. They didn’t know it yet but it was for their benefit. She’d started small, running little errands, pouring drinks and cleaning up messes. Now they had her passing messages, taking notes and assisting with more of the day to day tasks. She was just a low-class to them. Almost invisible in their eyes. But she appeared completely loyal. They could’ve never guessed that she truly despised Kavis and was spying on him and the council’s closed door meetings.

There was some plan going on with the council. Something involving the humans in the colony. There was a divide purposefully being put into place through a cleverly placed story here and there. And then there was Killian whom they were promoting to Captain of the Guard very soon. They were clearly pleased with his new found companion, though why they were so interested in his daily life she was yet unsure. She couldn’t help but get the feeling the pieces she was picking up were part of a much larger plan that did not end well for the humans. Knowing her culture, they were probably trying to put the ultimate hierarchy back into place, where the strong dominated the weak...in this case...the humans. And with no humans on the council, there was no one to stop them...yet.

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Thiza was holding Claire on her hip when there was a knock at the door. Strange, Killian didn't get very many visitors. She opened it with a curious smile and looked down at the little human holding her own baby. "Can I help you?" She asked politely.
"I came to say hi." Anna looked at the large Chippeqouti woman. She was taller than most human men and that was a bit intimidating in itself. Even a tad bit tall for a Chip female, though Anna tried not to show her surprise. "I'm Anna. One of your neighbors um...his neighbor."
Thiza stared down at her a moment. "Well, hello. Killian is not here at the moment. I can take a message if you want."
A slightly confused grin came to her face. "I came to say hi to you. Wanted to know if you and Claire had time to visit."
"Oh." Thiza's initial instinct was to say no. She had no desire to make any human friends. They were far below her. However...if Killian knew this woman and Thiza was rude to her, he might lose the growing affection that had been growing towards her. "I have a little time. Come in." She stepped aside for Anna and closed the door behind her. "Are you friends with Killian?" Thiza asked curiously. "I have never seen you speak to him...at least not since the funeral."
Anna smiled a little more broadly and stepped into the house. It was nice and neat like it always was. No doubt it was Thiza. From what she remembered Killian wasn't the neatest person with his own space. Peering under Jacob's blanket she then raised her gaze as Thiza spoke. "He's very busy. I never see him, but I was more of a friend of his wife. If you want to know if I know Killian then yes, I do."
"I see." Thiza sat in one of the sofa chairs, Claire on her lap, snuggling against her chest. She studied Anna with a curious eye. The human held herself like a noble but spoke like a commoner. Like most humans she had the audacity to hold herself and speak as if she were Thiza's equal. She remained silent, waiting for the human to make the first move. She would know soon enough if she were truly just interested in making a new friend, or looking for a piece of gossip to pass around. Either way, she would not be obliging.
If the woman could possibly make it anymore awkward it was hard to tell. Anna personally found the woman to be a bit cool. "How did you end up meeting Killian? I didn't know he had any friends after..." Cutting it there she figured it was best to leave that be. It had been a very difficult year or two for Killian and it was better not to talk about some things whether he was present or not.
"I offered to help him watch Claire. He was quite overwhelmed after his loss and no one else was stepping up to help." She tone held a slight accusatory tone.
It seemed the remark was rather pointed and Anna raised an eyebrow slightly. "Kato and I offered. He made his own choices and I can't change them. Personally I think it may have had part to do with the fact that he and my husband never got along and there are various reasons for that."
Thiza shrugged slightly. There seemed to already be tension between Killian and this so called neighbor. Good. "Well...you said you came to say hello to me...was there something specific you wished to discuss?"
This woman was nothing like Star and it was slightly disappointing. She was just as cool and indifferent as Killian could be. Anna had remained standing as she had not been invited to sit, but perhaps it would take one last little invitation. "Would you like to have a picnic with Jacob and I this afternoon?"
Thiza smirked ever so slightly. Humans...so casual, so painfully unaware of the hierarchy that clearly ruled them. She stood. "No." She replied simply. "I understand you were friends with Killian's previous mate, but...I am not her." Claire began to fuss and Thiza put the babe on her shoulder. "Do enjoy your picnic though while the weather is warm."
Blinking a few times she dumbly nodded and started for the door. "I will enjoy the picnic." As soon as she was out the door Anna started walking for the road. That Chip was an absolute bitch. Didn't even try to be polite. The door was closed and she figured it was as good a time as any to murmur to herself. "I'd like to spy on your fancy ass. I thought Kato was a stick in the mud. Well you've got one so far up your rear end you can't even manage to tip you head down to look at me. I was even polite the whole time and peering down at me over that long nose. Not one to complain, but next time he stops over I will tell him she's not friendly."
 
When Kato returned home that night Anna vented. "That new woman Killian has hanging around is a...she's worse than he is. I can deal with him being quiet and all. She's just flat out rude!"

"I'm sorry?" Kato blinked and sat down them guestured for her to sit beside him. "Start at the beggining."

Anna pushed his plate of food toward him. "First of all I went over to say hi and she didn't even offer for me to sit down. Just kept staring at me from behind her snoggen, then she practically accused us of not helping Killian. He's damn hard headed and I can't change that. If she couldn't have been more dreadful she pretty much moved on to ask if I had anything to say and so I offered to go on a picnic with her and Claire. Thiza just said no and left it there and walked me to to the door. Such a bitch. I wanted to talk with her and try to make friends. She's on her high horse. At least even when Killian was the captain Star didn't hold it over anyone's head. This woman acts like she's the fucking queen of Sheba."

Kato nodded silently. After swallowing his current mouthful of food he said, "I'm sorry you had to deal with that honey."

"Oh well." Anna sighed. "I was just really mad. Somehow I thought if she caught his attention she might have been a nice lady. Maybe it just takes time to get to know her. Took a while to get used to Killian." Meeting Kato's gaze she smiled softly. "How is work? Still needing another human doctor?"

Kato nodded, chewing through another mouthful of food. "Its busy. That flu has been going around and everyone is nervous about it becoming something worse. The refugee doctor just knows the bare minimum to get back, I've put him on the easy non-urgent cases. Shanti has been a great help but she's still just a nurse. Unfortunately, its still not exactly safe to go searching for a good doctor right now, much less one who would be willing to live in a colony like this." Kato shrugs. "We get by though. How's Jacob been doing?"

It didn't sound good and Anna wished there was a way to get information. Maybe she would have to start going out for herself. "Jacob has been fine. You know I can't help thinking there is something going on. Even the Chips that were friendly before are turning their backs on us. Maybe you don't see it in the hospital so much, but I do. I'm here all day and I've started going on walks. Sooni won't even do so much as look at me. Killian hasn't changed any, only too busy to do anything besides the work they give him and then he goes home to Claire like a father should." Wandering over to stand behind Kato she rubbed his shoulders. "What do you think of me taking a few more walks and seeing what I can hear?"

Kato sighed, dropping the fork, and lowering his head as she began to massage his tight shoulders. "Whatever you want to do, Dear." He didn't see the point but she had an uncanny ability to see things he didn't. "Just try and not get into any dangerous situations, hmm?"

"I won't." Anna rubbed a little deeper since it seemed the knots just shifted. "Thought I'd like to go spy on that woman too. She really pissed me off and I might make a few things in her house stop working." Giggling a little she leaned over the chair and kissed Kato. "If you think a few parts of you are working tonight I'd be willing."

The walks around the colony proved to be mostly fruitless. Anna wasn't hearing anything. If there was one common theme it was the growing distrust of the Chippeqouti and that was dangerous in itself. She would have to try and talk with Killian if he was ever free. Maybe one of these nights she would go to his house to see if she could talk with him. He was perhaps the one Chip that was concerned about the humans and their well being. They needed an ally somewhere in this mess and it seemed he was about to become the captain of the guard. Either he was playing into their hands or he was just surviving and they liked it. Anna's suspicions were rising and she knew that while she disliked Thiza that perhaps the woman was more than what she seemed. What if she was a human sympathizer and had to be careful? Anna couldn't see Killian settling with someone that didn't care about humans or his half blood daughter.

Watching for a time that he would be home she waited one evening until it was likely that it was just him and Claire. Anna knew from her own little walks in the evening that the Chippeqouti woman had been eating dinner at his house every night. Wrapping a coat around herself and the baby she stepped out her door and peered up the lane. Wind whipped around her legs and she shivered a little. It was easy to see his living room if she walked on one side of the road. Adjusting her scarf she weaved on the road so that she could see and it almost appeared that he was home alone. Anna needed to talk with him before this got much worse. Humans would be revolting if things did not change. Anna trudged through the snow that had fallen fresh on the ground and made it to the edge of the property, as she walked up the steps of the porch she heard Thiza's voice. So she was still there? How long had the woman been staying at night? Was it already too late to talk to him and would she ever get a chance without Thiza being there. That Chippeqouti woman was constantly in his presence like a leech. Quietly turning around she took herself back down the stairs and resumed her walk.

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Travelling had become a sort of habit and Killian still tried to run the scans when Thiza wasn't with him in the room. She was hanging a bit closer and even if he hated to admit it, there was a certain comfort to having someone there for him. The two of them had been going together now for nearly 4 months and she had begun staying in the extra room at the house. It saved her having to walk in the winter and it was better than the little house she had. The woman had breakfast ready for him in the morning and helped take care of Claire first thing. He couldn't have asked or dreamed of anyone being so kind to his daughter. Things were starting to look up again with the promotion to Captain of the Guard. In fact they erased the debt he owed on the ship. As long as he paid for all the maintenance and upkeep of the ship he was free of the debt and he flew often to make patrols of the planet and ensure the safety of the colony. Only thing left to pay for now was the serum that they had used on him and it would still take a long time to pay that off even with a substantially greater income.

It was just the two of them sitting in the navigation room and Killian leaned back in his chair. "Thiza, I wanted to ask you something."

Thiza looked up at him. "What's that, dear?" She asked kindly.

Twisting the navigation seat from side to side while he sat in it he appeared to be in thought before answering. "You know I've been thinking maybe we should try to move to the next level and see how it works out. Things been going pretty good with you staying in the other room. I'd have to clean the room up a little if you were gonna move into it with me. Just wanted to know what you thought about that."

She was quiet a moment. "I do want that, Killian. I can honestly say I have begun to fall in love with you. But, are you certain you are ready? I will not compete for your affection with a dead woman." She says tenderly, but seriously.

Killian swallowed and nodded his head. "You're right." Glancing at her he sighed. "I still love her, and I miss her. Thiza, you brought a little life back into the house and she's gone. There isn't anything I can do about that. Doing the best I can for Claire and you'd be the best judge of whether you feel that you're competing with her or not."

Thiza leaned forward, putting a gentle hand behind Killian's head and giving him a long kiss. She finally pulls away and searches his eyes. "Let's give it a try. More than anything I want to become the next person you love after she has faded to memory."

Kissing had become a little easier with time. Sometimes he found himself getting lost in the moment. When she pulled away he kept his gaze steady. "Ok. When I get home I'll clear out some space for you to put your things."

The rest of the trip Killian stayed to his room and Thiza stayed in hers. Their agreement was for when they got home. Killian took the ship back and logged his reports from the mission. Putting a coat on he grabbed the one that he had got for Thiza. She didn't have one quite warm enough for the winter, but he didn't want her freezing and so he got a thick wool one for her. Little Claire clung to her and he carried the bags on the way down the ramp of the ship. "Now for the days off at home." Leaning toward Thiza he gave her a gentle kiss and stayed behind to be sure that the ship locked up and everything was secure. It didn't take him long to catch up with her and Claire.

Racing ahead of the girls he dropped the bags at the door and unlocked it for Thiza to walk in first. Inside the house he set the bags on the floor and took his shoes off then his coat. Wandering into the bedroom he rested a hand on the back of his neck and sighed. Star had so many things to move. Not that she actually had so much. There was just more than what he had remembered. Killian started with her clothing and cleared out the dresser. He didn't quite have the heart to give her clothing away. Maybe in time. For now he walked over to his closet and stuffed it full of her things. Besides, Thiza hadn't bothered his stuff before and she didn't have any reason to. The picture from the top of the dresser had to move. Taking the photograph he stuffed it into his vest pocket and the corners of it bent slightly as he forced it into the pocket.

Little trinkets and things that she liked to decorate with stayed out and in their place. Finally Killian had the room ready and he opened the door. It was evening and Thiza was in the kitchen cooking. Killian planned to help her move her stuff in after Claire had gone to bed. It had been 8 months since Star had gone missing, though died was more like it. In many ways it was a difficult concept to beat into his head.

At least Thiza was patient as she had been with the random days he felt a little off. The first night Killian took his shirt off like usual and got into the bed. He hadn't been used to sharing it for a while now and his heart jumped to the back of his throat when he felt a hand brush against his back in the middle of the night. Killian stared ahead for a while and remained in exactly the same position until her hand moved and then he relaxed a little bit. Sharing the bed was in some ways a big step and he thought about second guessing himself, but one night wasn't enough to determine anything long term.

Weeks went by and like most of the other things with Thiza it became a little more natural though he couldn't quite bring himself to get any further than holding her gently for a few minutes and maybe kiss her a few times before he would turn over and go to sleep. Star was gone almost 9 months now and he could get through a day at work without feeling like he was being shredded to bits. Having some company when he got home was always a comfort. Walking through the door Killian went to the kitchen to find Thiza busily cooking. Sneaking up behind her he wrapped his arms around her stomach and when she turned he kissed her gently. "You look lovely today."

Thiza smiled up at him. "Well, thankyou." She set aside the spoon she was stirring with and turned around to properly kiss him. "Claire's been calling for her papa all day. She's really picking up those words quickly. Smart little girl." She kissed him again, patting him on the chest before returning to cooking. "How was work? The council isn't pushing you too hard are they?"

A grin came to his face. "Oh has she?" Thiza kissed him again and Killian winked at her before he turned to go find Claire. More than likely she would be pulling herself toward him anyway. "Hmm?" Glancing back at Thiza he shrugged. "Just the same. Maybe a little more work, but I won't be debt till I'm 139." Chuckling a little he leaned over and picked Claire up. "You're worth it." The baby pointed with one of her fingers and squeaked proudly. "Mama!" Killian nodded at her. "Yeah." She was young enough telling her any different wouldn't help.

Thiza laughed. "Oh now she says mama. I'm trying to teach her the difference. Looks like it hasn't quite clicked yet." Thiza shook her head, chuckling then set the food on the table. "Come here, handsome. Sit, eat. Tell me about your day."

Chuckling a little he walked with Claire over to the table and set her in her little high chair. Sitting down at his place he sighed. "Well...I got more paperwork to do. Guess its one damn way to get better at reading. Had the secretary come in and read at least a few pages for me while I tried to type a report. Then next month I have another one of those tours. Can't take you on that one." Killian took a bite of the food and chewed it before swallowing. "How about you?"

"I harvested a good haul from the greenhouse and took Claire with me to the market to sell. She really loves those carrots but seems to hate the strawberries. Seriously what kid chooses carrots over strawberries." She shrugged. "Anyway I made about 200 chips. I'm thinking about putting part of towards Claire for a new wardrobe. This little one is growing fast and she's about to go through another growth spurt."

At mention of the strawberries Killian's fork clattered on the plate. He quickly retrieved it and tried to regain his composure. "Uh...she would have uh...Sh -she got it from her mother. Star was allergic to them. If Claire doesn't like strawberries don't make her eat them and uh...Maybe we'll leave after my trip to get some clothes for Claire. You should keep your money. I'll buy the clothes." Right now there weren't any living expenses for Thiza, but he figured that was about as fair as it could get for the time.

Thiza frowned ever so slightly. Even now that woman still held such a hold over him. She made a mental note never to mention strawberries again. She'd also learned that Cocoa and the color red held certain triggers for him as well. It was frustrating trying to build a relationship with a man still in love with a dead woman. Had he been any other man, she might have pulled away and held off for several more months. But the pressure from the council to seal things with him was becoming somewhat overwhelming. She wasn't certain why this union mattered so much to them, but it did. "I don't mind." Thiza finally replied. "I consider Claire as much my daughter now as you do. And, we are living together...the only thing left..." She gave him a soft, flirty smile. "Well, if you're up for it....I thought maybe we could try tonight."

It seemed that Thiza had noted the fact that they shared everything except intimacy. Killian smirked. "Yeah..." Leaning back in his chair slightly he chuckled. "Thought you'd never ask." For now it was his way of joking and trying to make light of a difficult situation. Dinner stayed pretty quiet from there on out. Occasionally he would catch a look from her and Killian would smile apprehensively. He could see where she was coming from and still it felt in some ways like he was pressured. For now he wrote it off as being in his head. Anything that was beyond getting up in the morning felt like pressure. They'd been sharing a bed for a while now and it was about time to move forward. As it drew closer to evening he got Claire ready for bed and then took himself to his and Thiza's bedroom.

Killian got ready for bed like usual and he pulled the covers back and rolled into the bed before flopping the blankets over himself and turning toward Thiza. Usually they cuddled a very little bit, but tonight she wanted to go further. Kissing her gently he pulled her a little closer to himself. Frowning he felt along her back. "That's not what you usually wear to bed."

"I'm glad you noticed. Like it?" She says with a soft smile, her hand running down his chest.

"Mmmhmmm." Killian pulled her a little closer for another kiss and shifted on the bed. "Its dark so I can't see the color. Pretty sure it would be...uh blue?"

"Purple, like that dress. But, close." Thiza let him hold her. "I'm not going to push you, Killian." She says tenderly. "But if you weren't ready to move forward with me, then you wouldn't have invited me to your bed." She bit her lip as a closing statement came to her mind. It was risky, but it might just be the push he needed. "I'm not going to be able to wait in this limbo much longer." She whispered.

Seemed that she had seen right through his little delay. Killian had thought maybe there was some pressure and he understood it better. Of course she couldn't wait around unless he was willing to take this a step further. She already looked like his woman and he needed to make her that. "You won't have to." Kissing her along the side of her neck he moved to lean over her and kissed Thiza again.

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There was another flight mission. Killian had felt guilty the first night he slept with Thiza. He knew that he wasn't ready, but she couldn't wait forever for him to make his mind up and he already knew she would be the best for Claire. Like most of the other things, when she pushed a little and he got used to doing it things weren't so bad. Usually it would settle down. Some of the longer trips had been transferred to other Chippeqouti captains and he was given shorter runs. In some ways it seemed odd to be away from home so much more often and yet still close enough to be home every night. At the same time it was nice.

Anna was out on one of her usual walks. She'd noticed that for some time now Thiza didn't go home to her own place and she assumed that meant that Killian had started a new life. It was good for him and yet all of it seemed to be a little fast. Still she couldn't say anything. All she could is what she was good at. Watching and listening. Humans were becoming increasingly restless and Killian was gone more and more though he was still home almost every night. He took direct orders from the council. It was all starting to make sense. Walking to the outskirts of the colony she saw the guard posted there. They were protecting the colony and from what? To Anna it felt more like they were keeping the people here. If she had a chance she still wanted to talk to Killian. Find a way to talk to him without his new lady hanging around.
 
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Star inspected the oddly shaped shield one more time. It had taken her nearly 6 months to put together. Between the mining, the processing, the melding...all of which had to be done in small increments and in secret, with tools that weren’t designed for what she needed. And yet, despite how hard it had been, the things she had to do, she was nearly ready for her escape. The shield was shaped like an upside-down “L” with a point coming out the front. She had to be able to pierce the shield with enough force to get through. That would require a running start and the dagger like point. That was the easy part though. After she’d gotten through she had to get to the ship before alarms started going off. Then she had to take over the ship by herself and fly it back to the planet.

It got harder after that. She’d have to land secretly, far enough away from the colony so as not to be spotted. After nearly 10 months of replaying those last few horrible hours in her mind over and over she’d realized...it had all been a set-up. Kavis had no doubt poisoned Killian somehow, then sent her on the ship to try and kill her and the only other doctor who would’ve been able to tell that they were killing Killian. It was the only thing that explained that virus. The question was why. She still hadn't come up with a good answer. Whatever the reason, that bastard was going to pay...but first...she had to Claire out. Her baby...her arms and heart ached to hold her again. Mommy’s coming, Claire. Just hold on.

Star raised her head as she heard the supply ship landing. This was it. Star covered the shield with a mining bag and carried it out of her hovel towards the bubble shield which covered the planet. She had to find the right spot to exit without really being noticed. There was a clump of trees next to where she’d landed the first day that should make a good exit point. It was a bit further from the ship than she would’ve liked, but it would have to do.

She held the shield before her and charged. She flew through the bubble shield with far more ease than she’d expected and tripped over her own feet. Star scrambled up out of the dirt and stared in wonder as the bubble shield quickly repaired itself. She’d done it! She’d actually gotten through! She could’ve cheered but she was still far from free. Star rushed the store owner, knocked him out and searched him for any weapons. She found a gun under the desk and made sure it was loaded.

Next was the ship itself. People were going to and from the ship, loading a little warehouse close by. The first one spotted her and she shot him in the knee. She grabbed his gun too, now dual wielding. Nothing was going to stop her now. She was getting on that ship and she was going home.
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Star’s throat seemed to close and her eyes filled with tears as the forested planet came into view. Claire...she was so close. Oh, Killian...how desperately I wish you were there...waiting for me too. Star swiped at her eyes and landed the ship a safe distance from colony. It was night so they shouldn’t have seen her approach. She grabs a pack filled with supplies and hurried out the ramp, a woman on a mission.

It was 2 am before she reached the village. She watched from the trees as chippequoti guards patrolled the perimeter. How stupid was it that she had to sneak back into her own colony. The one that she had helped set up. Star had no idea where Claire where was, but she knew someone who would. The only person in this colony she could trust. She weaved her way through the village. It had been almost a year but she still knew Anna’s garden and home when she saw it. She pushed open the window and climbed in silently, closing it behind her.

A toy squeaked beneath her feet and a soft cry sounded from her right. She was in a baby’s bedroom. That’s right...she’d almost forgotten Anna was pregnant before she left. She’d missed her friend’s birth. Star stepped towards the cradle trying to shush the babe who only began to cry louder. Well, that was one way to signal her homecoming. The lights flickered on and she came face to face with Anna. Star stared at her, a wave of emotions rushing like a flood. Relief, joy, sorrow. All she could manage was a soft, “Hi, Anna.” From Anna’s expression she could imagine the woman was seeing a ghost or a stranger. Star’s hair was still chopped short and messily, faded burn scars marked her arm and the right side of her face, her body was almost like a body-builder’s. Did her friend even recognize her?
 
"Ugh..." Anna rolled over in the bed. Sounded like Jacob woke up again and the little guy had been doing so well. He slept through the night and now he was doing this? She tried to tell herself that babies didn't cry without reason. Probably had a sore tummy or he had a scary dream. Maybe he scared himself and decided he needed mom to hold him. Shuffling into the room she flicked the light on and froze. Those eyes looked so familiar and yet it was a tiny bit frightening for herself. Rushing over to the crib she snatched the baby up and back toward the door. "Star?" That was the only person she knew who looked like that and sounded like that. "We all thought you were dead." In case this crazy person tried anything she was prepared to slammed the door in their face and scream for Kato to do something. Odd that she would rely on him since he was typically the least experienced person when it came to killing others.

"Almost was." Star stared at her silently. Anna looked scared. The way she held the baby, the way she backed away to the door. Was she really so scary looking? "I...I need help. Please, Anna...I need Claire but...I don't know where she is." She pleads softly.

It took a moment for Anna to calm herself and she stroked the back of Jacob's head. "Star I'm so sorry..." Anna didn't even know how to say it nicely. "Things have been so crazy since you left. Lets get you cleaned up and I'll grab some of Kato's sweats pants and a hoodie for you. We'll need to talk about some stuff before you go to get her."

Star nodded, setting the pack down on the floor. It was such a relief to be in a safe place with a friend after all this time. Still something felt off...and she couldn't but keep her guard up somewhat. "Is she ok? Is she well? Who's been taking care of her?" Star asks as she follows Anna.

"You need to get cleaned up first. I need time to think about how to explain this to Kato when he wakes up and what to say to you." Anna shoved a towel toward Star and ushered her to the guest bathroom. Wandering back into her bedroom she turned one of the lamps on and started to pull the drawer open that had Kato's clothes in it. She would have offered something of her own, but there was a big difference between her size and Star's. When she heard Kato groan a little she walked over to his side of the bed and brushed her fingers through his hair. "It's alright I'm just taking care of a few things. Jacob woke up." Then she took his clothing to the bathroom and laid it on the top of the toilet seat before skittering out to the kitchen.

Star was starting to get frustrated. Anna was avoiding the question. Was Claire dead too? Had they killed her baby along with Killian? She might've gotten more intense and demanded answers but Anna seemed nervous enough as it was...and she needed this friend. She'd waited almost a year. She could wait a few more minutes. The hot shower was amazing after 10 months of pitiful bird baths. Anna even had that shampoo she liked. By the time she stepped out of the shower there was a change of clean clothes on the toilet seat. She changed and dried off the excess water from her short hair then stepped back out into the hall, looking for Anna.

While Star showered the little woman got Kato's coffee ready and she made some tea for herself and her friend. At long last she heard the water turn off. It actually hadn't been that long, but this was all too crazy and it felt like forever. Leaning to the side she waved to Star to come to the kitchen. "Claire is with Thiza right now. A Chippeqouti woman. I tried to visit her once after she'd been taking care of the girl for a while. Seemed that Claire was in excellent health and Thiza has been living with Killian." She knew that none of this would be easy and she stared at Star's face for a long moment. "Rumor had it they sent another ship as soon as they lost signal and they did everything they could to save him. He was so heartbroken. Nobody sees him except that Chip woman."

"Killian..." Star's eyes turned red and throat seemed to close. "He...he's not dead?"

Anna shook her head. "No...It was a rough run and he was pretty sick for a few weeks. He came to pick up the baby. Then the last I saw him was a few months ago when he brought that birthday present from you. Star..." Reaching across the table she grabbed her friend's hand. "I wouldn't trust Thiza. Got my own opinion about her, but you need to wait till he comes home. I walk that way often enough that I could tell you when he's back."

Star stood up suddenly and turned away. She wanted to throw up. All this time...he was alive? The things she'd done...and he'd been here...safe and sound. But she'd been dead to him and there was another woman, in her home, taking care of her baby. She put a hand on her stomach. She felt like she couldn't breath. He was alive...he was alive...she was equally distressed and overjoyed by the news. "How long...how long as she been there? Is it...are they serious?" She didn't want to know but she had too. This changed things.

Opening her mouth and closing it again Anna sighed. "Like I said. Nobody has seen much of him. I've watched as best I can. It might be serious. Only a few months ago the Chip woman quit going home at night. She's been living there." Anna lowered her eyes. "Star we both know he wouldn't have done something like this unless you were dead. Something had to happen for him to choose this. Talk with him." Her heart ached for her friend and for the pain it must cause to find out that Killian was alive and likely sharing his bed with another woman. "It's been almost a year."

Star finally managed to compose herself enough to sit back down. She tried to pick up her tea but her hands had begun trembling again, so she stuck them in her lap. She needed time to breath and process. She knew making any rash decisions right now about whether or not to talk to him, whether or not to grab Claire and run (which was still her instinctual desire) would be rash. Star looked up at the boy in Anna's arms as he fussed. "What's his name?"

"Jacob." The little woman rocked him gently. "Little stink pot thinks it's time to nurse." Pulling her night shirt up she held the baby to her side and flopped the blanket over him and her shoulder so that it provided some modesty. "You'd better stay with us for a few days. Kato may not be good at hiding people, but he can keep his mouth shut if need be. You won't get into that house or out of it without that Chip woman knowing. She's quite vigilant."

Star took a shaky breath, running her fingers through her choppy hair. "The only thing that kept me going was the thought of getting back to her. Now some other woman has her. At least...at least she had Killian." Star's throat closed up again, but then her jaw tightened and her eyes turned violent. "Kavis...he did this. He nearly killed Killian..and tried to kill me. He needs to die." She said with a low growl.

Shaking her head a little Anna gazed at Star. "How do you know he's the one? What kind of proof do you have? I've been watching and trying to talk to Killian for months and I haven't got any kind of proof."

"Its the only thing that makes sense." Star leans forward angry, not at Anna but at whoever had caused her to suffer like this. "He fights against Killian for power...he wins but there are still lots of people who supported him. He has a thing against humans, you could hear it in his debate. Killian was still a threat to him. Though...why he would want to kill me too...I don't know. But that virus...the virus on the ship that was purposeful. I barely escape and Witteck...he didn't. If it wasn't Kavis then it was someone close to him. I'm sure of it."

Anna nodded. "Ok..." Then she winced when she heard Kato in the room. He was woke up with all the commotion. Still she continued. "We need to get Killian. All the Chippeqouti have abandoned us. Eve Sooni will not look at me. They despise us. Star, it's almost like being on the planet Quoti all over again. It's not quite there, but they're becoming more and more stuck up."

Star shrugged and shook her head. "I just want my baby. That's the only thing I care about right now. That and killing whoever trapped me in hell for nearly a year."

Kato shuffled out of the bedroom rubbing his eyes. "Anna? What are you doing up so..." He blinked at Star, rubbed his eyes, looked behind him then looked back at her. "Uh..." He looked so confused. "Star...I must still be dreaming..."

There wasn't time to respond to Star before Kato came into the room. Anna sighed. "No you're not. She's here." It wasn't up to Anna what Star would do. The only thing she could do was be a friend and stand by her for the time. Ultimately it was up to Star with what to do with her life. She could say anything in the world and it wouldn't make a bit of difference. Star would do what she came to do and that was to get Claire back. The last statement seemed to be a total rejection of Killian and while he was living with another woman Anna couldn't say why. Maybe he really liked the arrangement. If she could have offered more insight she would have.

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In a way it seemed that Thiza was a bit more demanding when he was home. She wanted him to sleep with her more frequently. Was she really in such a hurry to get pregnant? He was going to have to talk to her about it. Killian wasn't ready for another baby. When he got into bed with her that night he could feel her creeping closer and he rolled toward her and kissed her gently before pushing her away. "Not tonight." So far she had everything except an engagement and he wasn't ready for that. Sleeping with her was tiding that process over for the time.

Early in the morning he got up and leaned over Thiza to kiss her on the cheek. "I gotta go. Should be back tonight or early tomorrow morning." Before leaving he poked his head into Claire's room and gave her a quick kiss on the head. She was a beautiful little girl and so close to crawling. It was actually pretty exciting to see her growing and starting to talk more clearly. Sneaking back out of Claire's room he took himself to the front door and got ready to leave. The air was cold like usual and the ship was freezing inside. He had to take his gloves off to get it started and he stared at the tattoo wedding ring. Always there and it constantly reminded him of her. Maybe he wasn't ready for another woman. Claire needed a mother and someone permanent. It was always the same argument that ran around in his head. What was good for him or Claire and he ended up choosing what he thought would be best for her. In time it would work out.

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The trip took a bit longer than he had anticipated and Killian didn't get home till the mid afternoon of the next day. Storms had blown in and he could only do so much if he wanted to get home safely. Landing the ship he shut it all down and punched the code in to let the hatch down. Swinging a bag over one shoulder he squinted in the bright light and turned toward the ship to punch the code again. He needed to go home for Claire and he had to talk with Thiza about not having a baby just yet. With her wanting his attention so much he could almost swear that's what she was trying to do.
 
"I'm telling you, he's not ready. If I keep pushing, he's gonna spook."
Sooni's attention was caught by the familiar female voice in Dougal's office. She looked around to make sure no one was watching then stood by the door eavesdropping.
"The chippequoti need as many woman having babies as quickly as possible. Our species is dying, we need new blood and lots of it." Dougal replied coolly.
"I understand that." Thiza replied in annoyed tone. "But I actually care about him. He is not ready for another child and I've pushed him much further than he was ready to already. I'm not doing this for you anymore, Dougal. I'm actually trying to build a life with him, so back off!"
"Your life is not your own, Thiza. You belong to the council. And unless you'd like me to tell him about how we've been paying you for this relationship, I suggest you don't argue."
Sooni's eyes widened.
"You wouldn't do that. You need me. If he thinks he can't trust me, your whole plan goes to belly-up...whatever it is. So, I'm saying it again...back off! This is my life now, not yours!"

Sooni fled from the door as heavy footsteps pounded in her direction. She just managed to turn the corner when Thiza came back out with Claire in her arms. She was clearly upset and from the sounds of things, she had a right to be. But it also made her wonder, what in the world the council had planning that they'd needed Thiza to bear a child with him. This whole situation was more than just about the strength of their blood line. It was about dominance. The average blood had been shifting and recoiling under the noble blood as they tried to exert their authority in a culture that no longer valued noble blood over low blood. This was especially true as the humans were beginning to feel the threats and pressure from their chippequoti neighbors suddenly. Something needed to be done.

Snow fell in a thick flurry, piling up against the houses in large piles. Sooni wrapped up best she could before hurrying out into the dark and into the storm. No one had been quite ready for this sort of weather and few had the clothing prepared. Killian's incoming shipment of coats and other winter supplies were impatiently waited for. It was one of those few times she knew that almost no one would be watching her. Chips hated this sort of weather, no one would be outside except maybe a brave human guard here and there. Sooni looked all around her before knocking loudly on Anna's door.
The little woman heard the wind blowing outside and she huddled in the sofa with Jacob. They were enjoying some quiet music while he nursed . For now anything related to television had to go on hold since Jacob was very attentive to sounds and he was easily distracted. With the knocking on the door she stood up and walked over and opened the door. She could feel the cold air even through the blanket and Jacob started to cough. The baby seemed to dislike the cold weather. "Sooni what are you doing here?"
"I need to speak with you. May I come in?"
Carefully stepping aside Anna made room for her. "Of course." As soon as the Chip woman was out of the way she closed the door again. "Take off your shoes and sit on the couch. I'll get something hot for you to drink." Whatever it was she wanted to hear it. Good or bad news. Lies or truth. Anna was always an open ear for any news at all.
"Thankyou." Sooni rubbed her hands, trying to warm up. She took the tea from Anna and waited for her to sit back down. "I am sorry for being so cold and absent of late. I have been working my way up into the inner circle of the council. If they had seen me talking with humans, they would not trust me like they do now. I have been listening and watching. Things are beginning to boil and I need your influence with Killian to help."
In a way the news confirmed Anna's suspicions and she shook her head. "I can help, but no one gets close to Killian anymore. What do you know about Thiza? She's always with him whenever he's not working."
"I am uncertain of all the details, but I do know she is a plant from the council in his life." Sooni took a sip of the drink. "I think...I think Star was murdered so that they could put Thiza in as an influence instead. They have been paying her to push things along with him. To the point where they want her to start having his children, immediately."
Anna always had to be careful. A spy's life had taught her that and she knew better than to reveal that she had Star here. Still the news seemed to coincide with some of her own feelings and what Star had said. Nodding carefully she looked at Sooni. "Do you know if Thiza has been successful?" If she was it could change a lot of things. "Next I will need to know how to get to him without encountering her. I've met the woman once and I don't think it would go so well a second time."
Sooni nodded. "I heard Thiza and Dougal arguing just a short while ago. She was telling him to back off because she cared about Killian and she wanted to build her life with him her way. He tried to threaten her by revealing that's been paid but she knows that would just destroy whatever plan they have. It sounds like they might be pretty serious already." Sooni took another drink. "As for meeting up with him without her, your best chance is while he's on guard patrol. Every other thursday he patrols the grounds by himself."
That was something that Anna didn't know. "Every other Thursday huh?" So it would have to be her chance. "Thank you. I'll do what I can. Now what do you need me to do?"
"Get the humans riled up. Let them know that the council is trying to enslave them and if they don't stand up for themselves the council will succeed. Hopefully something can be done before blood is shed."
"I can do that. What would contacting Killian have to do with that? To tell him they're going to be riled? He's captain of the guard." Anna couldn't help feeling a little suspicious of such a request. Riling the humans may be all that the council needed to put down the iron fist.
"He was the only other leader the humans stood behind." Sooni noted. "He cares for the humans, but...if his loyalty switches to the chippequoti, we'll be without hope for a leader who can lead both Chips and humans alike." Sooni looks down at her cup. "I am not a politician, Anna. I can not honestly say this is the best plan...but informing people seems to be the right play here. Perhaps you or Killian will have a better idea of how to approach this situation. I don't...not yet...but I'll keep listening and try to update you when I can."
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The next several days were a flurry of an emotional roller-coaster. Star was safe. She had a warm bed, hot showers, hot food...but all felt a bit like a dream. Like the nightmares of her sleep were the reality, the death of Killian still so painful, the sharing of her bed with random men a necessary evil that ate away at her identity. Then being awake felt like the dream. A bittersweet dream where Killian was alive, Claire was healthy and happy, but she had been replaced and so soon from the sounds of it. Not even a year and he had another woman in his home with their baby.

She spent most of the time silently sitting by the window in her room, watching the snow covered colony through a crack in the curtain. A couple times she'd seen that Thiza woman carry Claire outside and play with her in the snow or take her to the green house for gardening. The first time she saw her, Star had almost leapt out of her chair and charged out the door, but when she saw Claire's smile...that beautiful smile, she paused and wept. Her baby was happy, without her. She wouldn't even remember her at this age. How cruel would it be to snatch her from the arms of the only mother she'd known for nearly a year. And Thiza held her tenderly, as if she truly loved her. She wouldn't have asked for less...of course Killian would've become attached to whomever had treated Claire so well. Especially after such a long time.

Two days before Killian returned she stopped watching the window, spending the majority of her time laying on her bed fighting against instinct and desire and that ever looming depression that threatened to consume her. She loved Claire so deeply, she wanted her baby back, but what if she was better off without her now. And what if this woman Killian had found made him happy...could she be so cruel as to step back into his life after all this time and demand her rightful place in her home. She looked down at her calloused hands...she didn't even have the ring anymore. After all she'd done, she didn't deserve it. Maybe...maybe he was better off not knowing she was still alive. Maybe she should spare everyone the pain of her return and simply disappear again.

Star looked up as Anna knocked on her door and peered in. She'd been a good friend these last few days. Despite being curious she never pushed for more information than Star had been willing to share about where she'd been all this time. Anna had even held off Kato who wanted to do a full physical exam on her to make sure she was healthy and well. The doctor in him was obviously concerned, though whether for her or for the health of his family she wasn't sure. It must have been hard on them too, having her (now a stranger) suddenly pop back into their lives after all this time. She wasn't sure how long would be too long. As generous as they were...she didn't want to overstay her welcome.

Her eyes widened slightly as Anna quietly told her that Killian had returned home. She hung her head, staring at the ground, the flux of emotions berating her heart and mind. "Maybe I should just leave. Claire...she's happy, safe. Killian...god, I don't even know what I would say. All I can think about is how cruel it would be to suddenly come back into his life while he's in love with someone else. Maybe its better if he doesn't know." She lifted her head, tears welling in her eyes. "But I've missed him so much...so badly. Every day was just a battle to get up, to mine, to survive. As much as I've tried to let him go...I still love him...so deeply. I'm not sure I could handle him rejecting me...for her."
Anna sighed. "Star you owe it to yourself and him. Let me put this selfishly for just a moment. If you don't talk to him I could be the person to tell him one day that you are alive and you wouldn't even see him. Suppose he still loves you and what that would do to him. Now..." Anna peered into Star's eyes. "Sooni told me the council has been paying the woman to push things. If she's pushing and arguing the council it means something isn't right." Holding a steady gaze she waited for any kind of response.
A glint of hope arose in her expression. "You mean...she doesn't love him? She's just playing him?"
"I don't know what her feelings are. Rumor had it that she does care about him." Anna wasn't going to lie to Star, but she also needed her to talk with Killian for other reasons. "If you don't talk to him for yourself then do it for us. The Chippeqouti are slowly working on enslaving us."
Star took a trembling breath, her hands beginning to shake again. She clasped them together, holding them between her knees. To see Killian again...she wanted to so desperately...but she was terrified of what he would say. If he would ask her to stay away, tell her he was in love with that other chippequoti. But still, she had to risk it. For her own sake, and the colony's...if this woman was playing him...using her daughter as leverage, he had to know. "Ok. When? How?"
"Every other Thursday he patrols alone. If you don't see him this Thursday then next." Anna started to dig through the closet. "We'll need to disguise you. Don't worry. If he loves you half as much as I think he'd recognize you a lot faster than I did."
"You mean loved me..." She replied solemnly. "If he's living with someone else...he must've gotten over my death already."
Anna looked at her. "You don't know that. Remember all the crazy shit ass stuff he would do for you? Love like that doesn't just die in less than a year's time and he wouldn't have thrown an entire estate away and buy a damn ship if he didn't love you."
You don't move in with someone else when you still love someone else. She wanted to say, but...she couldn't talk. Not after months of sleeping with other men for something as stupid as chips. At least he was trying to be noble...she...she was nothing. She hardly deserved him anymore. "Are you going to come with me?" She asked, torn between wanting Anna there and wanting it to be a private reunion.
"I can't be." Anna glanced at Star. "It would draw too much attention. I walk by myself and I walk at night mostly. You'll have to do this and please for our sake don't chicken out."
Star nodded. "I'll try."
 
For at least one night everything seemed to ease up and Thiza didn't push as hard as she had been. Killian relaxed a little more in the bed though he didn't really cuddle with her either. Turning on his side he put his back to her and curled up in the blankets. He'd been freezing outside today and he didn't like it when it was this cold. Never had. At least he had that in common with the Chippeqouti. One thing he did have one leg up on them with the cold was that he learned to stop complaining about it years ago.

Part way through the night he started to feel a little warmer and he moved over in the bed and flopped an arm over Thiza. Killian didn't want her to think that he had a problem with her. It was just a rough couple of days and he was still having the dreams. Pulling his arm back he grew restless and finally sat up. He didn't think it looked like he woke her so he got up and took himself out to the kitchen to sit for a while. She had known almost everything, but this. It was something he couldn't talk to her about. Telling Star had been painful enough and he didn't think he could explain it from the beginning all over again. They hadn't known each other long enough for that kind of talk and he didn't want her to be scared. Claire needed the woman.

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Anna couldn't help being a little nervous as she watched Star go out. She prayed that somehow Killian still felt strongly about Star. There was so much stored into these moments. It would crush Star if he refused her. He had to know after surviving the games. Though she had never heard anything in detail she knew that Killian was a mess when he came back. Star had a similar dazed expression. There was a loss. Something had been lost and she didn't know what it was nor did she dare ask. If he took her back it was a sacred trust. One that Anna dared not intrude upon.

There were even things between herself and Kato that she considered part of a sacred trust. Things that the two of them would carry together and no other could know what had happened. Some of it was linked to her past and some of it was current. "Please...love her the same." Holding Jacob and peering out the window she watched Star's bundled figure disappear into the woods.

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It hadn't warmed up at all over the last few days. Killian landed the ship again and took his turn for patrol. This would be his long weekend and he wanted to take Thiza and Claire away. Somewhere not quite so cold for a few days. Perhaps back to the beaches. Shoving his hands into his pockets he took a few more long strides. In a little bit he could stop and get something hot to drink. Usually Thiza had a thermos that she would fix up on cold nights that he had watch. He couldn't go inside, but the thermos would be nice.

Taking a deep breath he shuddered and pulled his hands out of the pocket again. The gun was in the holster and he checked to be sure the snap holding it in was loose in case he had to draw more quickly. Rounding the corner heading toward the river he saw someone standing out there. Frowning he took a few steps forward. He wasn't close enough to tell who it was, but it wasn't normal for anyone to be out and they weren't the size of a Chippeqouti. "Hey you alright?"

Star took a walk in the woods, following Anna's suggestion to meet him there where there were less prying eyes. She waited amidst the trees, huddled in the coat Kato had lent to her. A scarf was wrapped about her throat and a hood over her head, nearly covering her face. Every breath released a puff of white into the air, blending in with the white snowy scenery as she stared out at that beautiful river. She heard footsteps and then...the voice. His voice. She turned. There he was, Killian. A mere 5 feet away from her. Seeing him again was like a dream. Her first glimpse of her love after so long was overwhelming. Those beautiful green eyes met her own in a look of confusion. His black curls had grown out, a light stubble taking over his face. His shoulders were hunched, and he stood less tall than before. But he was there...he was alive and alert.

Star covered her mouth with a trembling hand as a soft cry burst from her chest. She'd known he was alive but seeing him in the flesh like this...it felt like her heart had just started beating again. How she had missed him. How she'd longed for him. For his arms around her body, his lips upon her own, his heartbeat echoing in her ear. How she'd missed his voice, his beautiful melodic voice, teasing her, laughing with her, whispering intimate things to her. How she had ached for her lover, her partner and friend to be alive still. The man whom she wanted to grow old with, raise a family with. To love and to cherish every day of her life until death parted them. And for a while death had. Tears streamed down her face. She hadn't realized just how much of her had died until she saw him standing there. The parts of her heart that she'd turned off in order to survive. Now that they were reigniting, it was almost too painful. So painful, but so wonderful as well as all the love she had for him came flooding back to memory. Was she too late...too late to save their marriage, and reignite what they had before...or was there still a chance?

The figure just remained standing there and he saw them lift gloved hands to their mouth and hold them there. He wasn't sure what it meant. Were they hungry? Throat problems? Couldn't speak? It could have translated as any number of things. Warily he glanced about the area. It could have just as easily been a trap and he didn't have any back up. Resting one hand over the gun on his hip he cautiously took a few steps closer. Killian froze in place when he got closer and those eyes behind the hood and scarf. A familiar looking strand of hair showed. This wasn't real. Couldn't be real. Cautiously inching forward a little more he put a hand out and touched her elbow. She didn't seem to run or give him reason to think that she was afraid. "I-I looked for you for months. Star....I." Blinking a few times he brought a gloved hand up to wipe his eyes. It was cold outside, but he had to know it was her. Pulling the hood back his jaw dropped. It was as if reality hit...She was here. Star was actually here and he hadn't ever thought to see her again. His knees were feeling a little weak and he was afraid to touch her now and he wanted to hold her all at the same time. Throwing all caution to the wind he pulled her into an embrace. "Star..." Killian pulled a glove off one hand and threw the glove into the snow without a care. At first he held the hand over her head and then he rested his hand in her hair. "My precious Star." Words weren't enough for everything he felt. So much relief, fear, joy, and hope. "You came back."

Star nodded fiercely, weeping into his shoulder has she returned his embrace, holding him tightly, fearing to let him go. "I'm home, Killian. I'm home." For the longest time all she could do was sob. All fear, all worry melted the moment he'd grabbed her. "I missed you...so much." She finally managed to choke out. "I thought...you were dead."

Clenching his jaw he did his best to keep from crying. It would be a long night if he had to walk around with a frozen face. "They told me your ship exploded. I searched where they gave me coordinates and everywhere else. Never got anything conclusive." Pulling away slightly he peered at her. "You need to come home, but before you do I should tell you a few things."

"I know...you found...someone else." Her face contorted and she looked down, pulling away. "Thiza...she's been living with you...taking care of Claire...of you. My replacement..." She murmurs bitterly.

Killian stared into her eyes. "She's not a replacement. I thought you were dead and I held on for as long as I could. Thiza was good to Claire. I couldn't take care of her without someone to help and she showed up and refused no for an answer. It was help I needed and I'm sorry." Pulling Star closer to himself this time he couldn't help crying. "I broke our promise. You were dead and I slept with her." Dropping to his knees he took his other glove off and grabbed her hand. "Please forgive me. Star I want you to be my wife." Dropping his gaze he stared at the ground. How could he even ask her to forgive him? It hadn't even been a year and he was still a desperate mess.

"Don't, don't do that." She dropped to her knees before him in the snow. Her calloused hand reached up to touch his face while the other was held tightly in his hands. "I...I'm the one who is sorry. I did worse, much worse. To survive...to get back to Claire..." She choked down sobs. "I sold myself for money...so many times...I thought you were dead...no one was coming to rescue me. I'm not even worth being taken back." She dropped her head on his chest. This couldn't be real. This couldn't be happening. Kneeling here with Killian, begging one another's forgiveness, desperate to pick up where they had left off.

Her hand was rougher than he remembered and Killian reluctantly raised his eyes to meet hers. Taking a deep breath he listened to her. It was the worst that could have happened to her besides death. Searching her face he rested a hand under her chin and tilted her face up so he could see her better. "You did what you had to. Stay with Anna and Kato tonight. I have to finish my watch and I'll come for you in the morning. Promise me you won't run away. I need you Star." Despite the tears that still ran down his face he held a serious tone. "It would kill me to lose you again. Please be here when I come right after the watch is finished. I won't even go home till I have you in my arms."

Star nodded, holding him tightly. "Thiza...she's not who she says she is...please be careful. Protect our baby. Bring her to me."

His gaze hardened and he pulled away as he got to his feet. "I'll go home and get Claire before I come for you then." If this was what she needed from him he was going to do it. He had to. Star needed to have some proof of his devotion and he was going to give it to her. Killian picked his gloves up out of the snow and wiped his eyes again. It was cold enough outside knew that his eyes wouldn't be red for long. Shaking the snow out of his gloves he put them on and started away from the river. Skipping watch would bring way too much suspicion and he didn't want to do that. If they had told her he was dead something was up and then Thiza had almost seemed to convenient after he had heard what Star said. Something was wrong and his guts had been right all along only he thought too much and wrote his feelings off as just being grief.

By the time the half way mark hit he stopped at the house like usual. Killian could barely contain himself. He wanted so badly for this to be real when his watch was over. Taking the thermos he nodded to Thiza and started down the steps again. "I'll be back when watch is over." Taking a seat for just a few minutes he wrapped his hands around the thermos and let it warm his hands.

Morning couldn't come fast enough. As the sun came over the hills he paced his route and watched anxiously for the other guard to show up. Killian almost raced off as soon as the man showed up. "No events last night. I got to get home. Have a few things to do." Ignoring the stares from the fellow guard he rushed home at a near jogging pace. Thiza was already up and she was putting a little cereal into a bowl for Claire. "I'm not tired yet. You go back to bed and I'll feed her. After that I'm gonna bundle her up and go for a quick walk. Some fresh air might help her sleep."

Didn't seem that Thiza was going to offer too much of an argument and she shuffled off to bed again. Killian only fed Claire a few bites before he went to her room to gather up the thick pink blanket. Wrapping Claire in the blanket he opened his coat and held her inside. Stepping out the front door he walked briskly to Anna and Kato's house. Knocking on the door he waited for someone to answer.
 
Star still felt like she was in a dream. Parting from Killian was so hard in that moment. She didn't want to let him go but if he didn't continue his patrol the other chips would get suspicious. The weight on her mind and heart had lifted, so much so she felt like she was floating. She was home...everything she'd suffered, everything she'd done...it had been worth it. She was home and Killian had accepted her back with open arms. She practically floats through the door, smiling from ear to ear, happy tears still trickling down her cheek. She didn't even have to tell Anna how it had gone...her face said it all.

She paced the house, unable to sit still as she waited for Killian to come to her. Despite herself she eventually fell asleep on the couch, watching the door. Kato came in after his shift giving Anna a kiss. "How'd it go with her and Killian?" He whispered not wanting to wake her up. It sounded like it had gone well and Killian was coming back in the morning for her. He was glad, for both of them, but he knew things were probably about to get complicated with Killians' current lady friend. He grabbed an extra blanket from Star's bed and lay it gently over her before walking with Anna to their bedroom.

Kato was the first one up as usual. He usually went to the hospital early on Fridays so that he could get in more appointments and have the med-bay closed on the weekend. He looked up from his coffee as a knock sounded at the door. He stood and walked over to the door, opening it. "Good morning, Killian...and Claire. Come on in." He stepped aside, closing the door behind them. "She fell asleep on the couch waiting for you." Kato said softly, gesturing to the living room behind him.
When the door opened there was no hiding the slight scowl. Kato wasn't the person he wanted to see. Killian stepped in and nodded to the man. He'd already spotted Star laying on the couch before Kato could gesture. Reluctantly he handed Claire to Kato while he pulled his boots off. Taking the baby again he walked over to where Star was and put a hand on hers. "Star..."
Star blinked her eyes open. They immediately filled up as she saw his face. She sat up and wrapped her arms tightly around him. "It wasn't a dream. You're not a dream." She finally released him, gasping softly as she saw Claire. Her little girl had gotten so big, her eyes so wide. "Mama..." Claire grabbed Killian's collar as he tried to hand her to Star. The babe started to cry. The more he tried to pass her over, the louder and more clingy she got. Star lowered her arms, her face twisted in pain. "She doesn't know me anymore..." Star noted bitterly.
Almost immediately Killian was pulled into a hug that he hadn't quite anticipated. "I told you I was coming back." When they released he tried to hand Claire to Star. The little girl still called him Mama and that was alright for now. As careful as Thiza had been with the girl no one besides Killian and herself had held her and now Claire had gotten to a clingy stage and she didn't want anyone else. Killian noted the look on Star's face and he motioned for her to move so he could sit next to her. "Only one way to fix that. More time we spend together the easier it will get. She's still young and she'll know you in a few days."
"Yeah." Star nodded, trying not to take the rejection personally, but it was still so painful. To think her little girl had bonded with some other woman. It made her a little sick. "What about her..." She couldn't help but feel a strong sense of dislike and jealousy towards Thiza.
The way Star said her he knew who she was talking about. "I have to tell her. Could probably help her get moved back today and I still have all your things. Star I couldn't part with it so its all sitting in my closet."
She managed a small smile, but it faded too quickly. "Killian...someone in the colony tried to kill me. That ship exploding. It wasn't an accident." She took a breath and told Killian everything she knew from the beginning. From the beginning of the horrible seizures, to the doctor sending her off for the cure, the virus in the computer and her barely escaping. She skipped the part about what had happened to her for the time being and relayed what Anna had told her about Thiza being payed to be with him. "It had to have been someone on the council...someone with alot of pull. Probably Kavis. Point is...if you tell her I'm alive...the entire council will find out...and they may try and kill both of us...again."
The story was hard to listen to. Killian didn't remember the seizures. He never did, but having so many of them explained why he felt so sick and the reason they kept him in the hospital for days. Then the part about Thiza was gut wrenching. Made him feel like puking. Everything she did...it was what she was paid by the council to do. Wincing a little he looked at Star. "Well I'm not going back. I can't sleep with her. I'll just get rid of her and go out flying. I'll take you and Claire with me. We can...we could find a place for you to stay and I'll come for you when I can." He was starting to feel almost like his heart was being shred open all over again. Star was here and he couldn't have her. Thiza wasn't at all like he thought and he could barely stomach the idea of having to talk to her again.
She gripped his hand tightly. "If you won't be there, I'm not going. I...i have spent the last 10 months in hell." Her voice cracked. "I am not leaving...not again. I don't care how unsafe it is."
"Then stay here while I get rid of her." Killian was almost begging her. "Star just here for a few hours. I won't have her in the house at the same time."
She nodded. "I'm not going anywhere."

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Star approached Kato reluctantly. She'd been putting off his offer to do a full examination, for fear of what he'd find, but after several weeks of feeling physically unwell and the fact that she was about to go home with Killian, she knew she had to let him. Little red flags had been going up in her mind since before she'd escaped. She suspected what the most likely cause was...and she was terrified she was right. He started with a brief physical examination, with too many personal questions involved, followed by a blood draw of which he would do a full battery of tests on. He tested her eyes as well after she mentioned how the vision in her right eye had been damaged from the fire. While the computer tested her blood for various anomalies he got to work finding her the right prescription of glasses. They wouldn't be perfect since they didn't have the equipment to make glasses but he had a stockpile he could draw from.
"Here, try these." Kato handed her the 20th pair of glasses to try on. These were green and blue thick rimmed. Cute at least. She put them on staring at the chart. She closed her left eye. "Oh, wow...that is so much better. But, if I have my left eye open...it just gets blurry again."
Kato nodded. He took the glasses off and popped out the left lens, replacing it with a blank lens. "Try that. Both eyes."
Star looked at the chart and nodded. "It works. Its not perfect obviously but its much better. Thankyou."
"Of course." Kato smiled lightly. He turned as the computer beeped with the results. He sat in the chair and looked them over.

Star's heart clenched as his expression became serious. "I'm sick...aren't I? An...an STD?" She asked with a shaky breath. Her hands began to tremble.
Kato turned toward her. "I'm afraid so. How long have you been experiencing odd symptoms?"
Star trapped her trembling hands between her knees. "Two months maybe?"
Kato looked back over the results of the blood test. "Your chippequoti blood is doing its best to fight off the bacteria...but there is clear signs of a weakened immune system and there is still damage being done to your nervous system. What are some of your symptoms?"
Star looked down at her clasped hands. "Headaches, nausea, pain in my back and then my hands...they get these tremors." She took a breath and flicked her hair back out of her face. "Is it contagious?"
Kato nodded. "Yes. But until we can treat this you need to be very careful about passing it. Things like kissing, sex, handling blood...they should all be avoided for the time being."
"Can you...treat it?" She asked hopefully. It would be horrible if she came home after all this time and wasn't able to even kiss Killian for the rest of her life.
"The bacteria, yes. Several weeks of antibiotics should do the trick. However, repairing the damage already done will take longer." Kato rolled his chair a little closer to her. He put a hand on her knee. "Star, I don't know what you had to go through to get home...but, if you ever need to talk about it..."
"I'm fine, Kato. But thankyou."
"Well, I was actually going to recommend talking to Dr. Forester. The refugee doctor that Timo rescued...he's has experience in psychiatry and trauma."
"Oh, well...I'm fine." She slid off the table, touching her new glasses. "Thankyou for the glasses, and the exam. At least I know what's going on now."
Kato nodded and reached into the medical cabinet for the bottle of the anti-biotics she needed and a bottle of painkillers. "Take one, three times a day for the rest of the month. Then we'll come back and do another exam and see if its making any progress. Sound good?"
Star nodded. "Yeah. Thanks." She put the bottles in her pocket and left. The last thing she wanted to do was tell Killian...but she knew she had too. He'd been so kind after her reveal of what she'd done...but she still couldn't help but wonder if he saw her differently now because of it. What man in their right mind, wanted a woman who'd been with multiple partners and had an std?
Frank. Star smirked. Frank was special...Lisa had been lucky. But Killian was special too. The thought gave her a little more hope.

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Thiza spun as the door opened and Killian stepped through. "Killian, you're back! I made breakfast. Blueberry pancakes and..." She paused, noting the hard look on his face. "Killian what's wrong?" The look in his eye was a bit scary.
"I don't want to see you again." Killian stared at her long and hard. "You're sick and I've had enough."
"What?" Thiza blinked. She took a step towards him, her heart pounding. She could tell by the look on his face. Somehow he knew...had Dougal told him after all? To what end? "No, Killian...listen, I don't know what Dougal told you..." She stretched a hand out to him, her voice pleading.
Killian turned his shoulder toward her when she stepped closer and then she started to grovel. So Dougal was the one behind this. Made him think that Dougal may be more to blame than Kavis though they were likely linked. Glancing at Thiza he growled. "Would it matter? You were paid to do this! Played a good show and its over. Get out."
"NO!" She nearly stomped her foot. "I mean, that's how it started. He ordered me to do it...but...but after the two months or so I refused any more payments. I didn't give a damn about what they wanted anymore. You...you captured my heart and I told him to back off and leave us alone. That I wasn't going to obey him anymore. Please, I...I fell for you, Killian. I love you! I love, Claire. You're my family."
Clenching his jaw his frown deepened. Some of it had felt real and he had to do this to make it right. "We're not your family anymore. I let you in my home and that was the first mistake. It would be one to let you stay. Payment was your own affair and arrangement with Dougal." Stepping a little closer his eyes lit with a fire that hadn't been there in a long time. "If you have to tell him something, tell Dougal I will kill him. I don't give a damn what else you do with your life. Just go."
"Please, Killian!" Tears began to form in her eyes and roll down her cheeks. "Everything we've had, its been real. I swear it. I will sell everything I own and pay him back just to prove it to you. I know you feel the same about me. Please don't give up on us so easily. Please, give me a chance to earn back your trust." Thiza was desperate. She cared about him, she didn't want this to end.
His gaze softened some, but he wasn't going to give in. "That's a big lie to live. Keep your money, you're going to need it. There's no coming back from that kind of lie. I used to kill crew members for that kind of betrayal." Killian grabbed her arm and walked her to the bedroom. "Just take your stuff and go. I don't want to talk about this anymore."
She ripped her arm out from his grip. "You can't just not talk about this. Think about Claire! She need a mother and I have been that for months. Never once have I harmed her or mistreated her. I've loved her like my own. And I have loved you. While it may have started out as a lie, you have become the most important thing in my life. You can't just throw me out after sleeping with me. I love you. And if I had found out something about you like this...you would want me to give you a second chance. Please, you have to at least give me the chance to make this right." She pleaded.
Killian clenched his jaw again and he grit his teeth. "I am thinking about Claire. Lies like this are a lot deeper. There is always layers and I'm not going to deal with it. It would be more than second chances and I don't have enough of me left to be broken into one more piece every time I find out one more lie from you or anyone else. Tell me why you had to push so damn hard for me to sleep with you? Is that another layer to this?"
Thiza hung her head. "Dougal insisted. The council is demanding every female find a mate and get pregnant as soon as possible to help reseed the chippequoti population. I didn't want to, but...but what the nobles want the nobles get. I...I had to push you more than I wanted. I was hoping as soon as I was pregnant, you would be able to move on from Star, and focus on our future."
He was slowly starting to lose his fight as she described it. Thiza was a good woman and he cared about her. Yet there was so much guilt in the relationship and if Star hadn't come back he might have weathered this with her. "Just go." Sighing the words he turned away from her. "You should have told me the first day you came. It would have been better if this never happened."
"I'm not giving up on us, Killian. We were made to be together. Think about everything good that has happened between us since we met. Please...take time to cool off, but don't let this one dark secret ruin everything we've had together." She packed an over night bag but refused to pack more. "I'll leave for a few nights, give you time to process. But when you love someone, you don't give up on them. I'm not giving up..." Thiza shuffled to the door, tears streaming down her face and head low. She looked at him, one more time before leaving in disgrace.
 
Killian did his best to hold up the face while Thiza packed her things. She didn't even take it all and instead she only took a few days worth. He didn't want to do this all over again. As much as he loved Star he still wanted to comfort Thiza. Only one woman could live here and he chose Star. As Thiza left he refused to even look at her and he closed the door. Slumping against it he slid to the floor. "Ugh..." Everything in the house reminded him of both lives that he lived and he couldn't help feeling like a bigger douche bag every time that he turned around. How could you love two women almost the same, but in different ways?

There was one thing. Killian knew that he still wanted Star even when he had Thiza and so in time it would heal. Still it would be difficult with the other woman around and thinking that it was all going to blow over in a few days. He wanted to tell her that Star had come back and...Then what would happen he didn't know. It was only a matter of time till she found out anyway.

After he sat on the floor and stared at nothing for what felt like forever he went back to the room to pack up Thiza's things and put them in a pile by the door. There was a lot more than he remembered. Then he stripped the sheets and put on the fresh ones. His entire head felt like it would explode with the constant throbbing. So much emotion had triggered a massive headache and his heart was almost raw after months of grief, weeks of freaking out at the pace that he and Thiza were moving, then his wife miraculously showing up, and now his mistress being sent packing. Thiza was a fine woman and he didn't want to do this to her. She deserved more than this and especially if she really did have feelings for him. All the crap that she put up with between his grief and the occasional bursts of whatever it was called when a person just lost their marbles and broke down.

It was almost an hour past his usual lunch time when he finished getting it all done and Killian was completely exhausted. Walking out the door he shut it behind himself and locked it. Walking back to Anna and Kato's he knocked on the door and waited again for someone to answer.

Star leapt up from the couch and opened the door, being sure to keep out of view of the street. She closed the door behind Killian and hugged him. "Welcome back."

Nodding a little he looked at her and smiled weakly. "Yeah...Probably not a good idea to go home yet. She thinks this is all gonna blow over in a few days. I didn't tell her about you and...I think it was Dougal. He set her up to do this and he was there in the room when I finally woke up. He told me you were dead."

Star pulled him to the table where she had cooked for the first time in nearly a year. Just like riding a bike. It was her way of repaying Anna and Kato for their hospitality. She served up a plate for her and Killian. "Dougal may be the hand doing the deeds, but you know the chippequoti run on a higherarchy. I'll bet you anything Kavis or maybe someone else on the council is calling the shots." She shook her head with a sigh. "I just want to my life back..."

Taking a seat at the table he held his head with both his hands and stared at the food. Between the headache and exhaustion he didn't feel much like eating. Still he knew he should. "Thanks." Killian ate a few bites and nodded when she spoke. "I'll just deal with it tomorrow." Picking at the food he had a few more bites and then he stood up."I'm tired. Food is good. Maybe I"ll finish it later." Walking over to the living room he grabbed one of the decorative sofa pillows and laid on the floor with it. Unfortunately he didn't usually find couches all that comfy because they were too small.

Star went over to the couch and lay on it, her hand drifting down till it touch his hand. She looked at him worriedly. "I'm sorry about Thiza, Killian. Sorry...but...not sorry. Still, its not easy finding out someone betrayed you like that. Do you...want to talk about it?" How she had missed just talking with him. No matter how bad, she'd always felt a sense of pride and love swell up in her as he opened himself up to her. He didn't do that for anyone but her.

There were so many times he had wished he could feel her hand on his like this and now it was happening and he just couldn't feel the connection like he thought he should. Killian turned his head on the pillow so he could see Star. "She quit taking the pay after 2 months. Star she's not like you think. I know she loved Claire and that was why I..." Letting off at that point he sighed. "Its the only reason I could have done what I did."

"I'm the last person who will judge you." She says softly. Star carried her own burden of guilt that felt so much bigger than Killian's. "You thought I was dead...you trying to make sure Claire was cared for, and...you needed comfort. I...understand." She could feel the trembling starting in her hand again she withdrew as quickly as possible without making it look like she was upset with him. "Are you still having nightmares?"

Killian let out a breath and closed his eyes. He didn't want to talk about this anymore and he was gradually starting to fall asleep anyway. Taking a sharp breath he opened his eyes and looked up at her. For a moment it felt like she was shaking her hand and he wondered if she tried to wake him up. She must have been cause she was asking about the dreams. "Yeah." Closing his eyes again he almost relaxed and then he woke up again. "You wake me up in the morning?"

"Unless you wake up first." She stared at him as he began to fall asleep. It was so good to be back with him...and yet...they still clearly had a ways to go before things were back to normal.

Anna had stepped out of her room to see that Killian came back to the house here to stay. She didn't mind. In some ways it was a beautiful and tragic sight all in one. The two of them were together, but she knew that it was going to be a fight to regain what they lost. Enough time passed for a lot of things to happen. Grabbing the extra plate off the table she wrapped it with a covering and put it in the fridge for later. Perhaps Killian would finish it and perhaps he would forget. A whimper sounded from Jacob's room and the little woman went back to check on both Claire and Jacob. After she checked on the babies she decided to stop at the hallway closet and get some blankets for Star and Killian. Laying the smaller one over Star she then took the larger blanket and covered Killian. For now she would let the two of them be. Anna stepped out of the living room and went to the kitchen to check a few things on her data pad.

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Killian groggily turned his head when he felt someone rubbing it. "Mmmm." He still didn't particularly like to be touched first thing in the morning. After a moment he raised his head and looked up at Star. "Let me sleep." It didn't really matter that he asked her wake him up. "My head hurts and I feel sick." Grumbling a little he laid back down on the pillow and pulled the blanket over his head.

With a little more sleep the headache subsided and so did the sick feeling from it. Killian grunted when he felt someone nudge him and then the giggling started. Claire always loved to think that she woke him up and this time she did. She was immensely delighted when he pushed the blanket back and stared at her. "Come over here." The little girl's green eyes lit up and her black curls bobbed with every step in her crawl. "Where's mama?" As soon as he said it she pointed to him and laughed. "Alright then...Where's papa?" Again she pointed to him and laughed. "I could ask you where the dog is and you'd say the same thing." Tucking her under one arm he sat up and threw the pillow up on the sofa again. Killian wrapped the blanket around his shoulders and he he almost shuddered.

It still felt a little cold and it was probably that first thing in the morning feel. Sometimes it was easy to get up and keep warmth, other times not as much. Pulling the left over food out of the fridge he set it on the table and grabbed another fork. Cold or hot Star's food was always good.

Claire picked a bean off the plate and started to chew on it. The two of them sat quietly until a hand rested on his shoulder. Killian looked up and smiled. "Hey." He was feeling far better and much more lively now. Carefully he put Claire on the floor before standing up. Pulling Star a little closer and almost kissed her, but she wouldn't let him. "What's wrong?" Killian studied her face for a moment.

Now that there was time and some of the shock wore off he noticed some scarring on her face. Scarring that wasn't there before and he brought a hand up to gently brush it. "Star tell me what happened."
 
Killian had brought over a box of her clothes for which she was grateful. She was getting tired of wearing Kato's clothing. It was too big and...boring. After her first attempt to wake Killian went poorly she got up, took a shower and put on her favorite turtlenecked green sweater with those soft black pants. By the time she came back out Killian was the table eating with Claire who was babbling happily while eating veggies off of Killian's plate. She just watched them for a moment. A few days ago she'd never have thought this was the life she'd be returning too. It was almost too good to be true. And yet there was still so much pain to work through, on both sides. She was wearing the glasses Kato got her. They helped so much with the blur that had been in her right eye up till now.

Star smiled lightly and put a hand on Killian's shoulder. He looked up at her with those eyes she'd missed so much and that gentle smile that promised everything was going to be ok. He set Claire down and held her tenderly, like he used to do. His head bent ready to kiss her and she almost let him, turning away at the last second as she remembered Kato's warning and the faces of all the men she'd kissed and more while in hell.

Killian touched her scar and she flinched. Part of her had hoped he would never notice. "Star tell me what happened." That was a loaded statement. Alot had happened in 10 months. Most of which she wanted to just forget and pretend was a nightmare. But she couldn't. Her husband deserved to know. Her husband...she didn't even have the ring anymore. When this was all over, and the dust had settled and that other woman was gone forever, she wondered if they couldn't just pack up and go...restart their lives again elsewhere in the galaxy. Renew their vows, raise Claire, forget about the rest of the galaxy and just focus on them.

She finally looked back up at Killian who was waiting patiently. Star took him over the couch and sat beside him, holding his hand tightly. She couldn't help but notice his tattoo'd ring was still there, and her thumb caressed it. Her next ring was going to be the same. "The ship had a virus. Me and Witteck had moments to escape. I took the first pod and ejected. He...he didn't get out before the ship exploded and sent my pod spinning towards the planet. Somewhere between the ship exploding and me crashing through a bubble shield, the pod caught fire. I was knocked unconscious and didn't wake up until a couple of the prisoners on the planet saw me and put out the fire. But...not till it had already done some damage. She pulled down the sleeve on her right shoulder, showing the extent of the burns. She hated it...her body was scarred enough as it was. She held none of the same beauty as her youth.

Star took a breath. "Come to find out it was a prison planet, and...I was stuck as one of the prisoners. There was no way out...except for the fact that we were mining Chromite...and you..." She looked into his eyes. "You taught me how to process it and turn it into a usable metal. And I did. It...took months of mining and...and supplementing my income through other means, but...I did it. Made a shield, covered it in Chromite and I burst through that bubble like it was paper. Stole a ship and flew it here." It was the brief version, but he got an idea of the important parts and he could ask later if he wanted more details.

"Killian...there's...there's something else." She looked down at their hands intertwined. "I'm sick..." Star took a trembling breath. She could already feel her heart-rate increasing and her hands beginning to tremble. Every time she felt stressed or was feeling a strong negative emotion, the tremors started. She was beginning to think maybe it wasn't just the disease causing this but maybe something psychological. Perhaps that had been why Kato recommended a psychiatrist. Perhaps he somehow knew the tremors were something else. She was going to have to ask.
"I, uh, I have a bacteria...from...from selling myself so I could get home. Kato gave me some anti-biotics, but if I'm not careful I can pass it to you and Claire. Things like kissing or exchanging blood or...things more intimate." She hadn't been able to look up at his face through the duration of the explanation. What must he think? He had his wife back but he couldn't even kiss her. She'd slept with dozens of men and they were both paying the price for it. "He said it should be treated in a couple months...so its not permanent but...yeah. It kinda sucks for the time being. So...I'm not, not kissing you because of...of her...but cause I'm trying to protect you."
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Thiza winced as Dougal stormed towards her as if to hit her. And he did across the cheek. She took the hit without a word as he continued rage. "You have failed me! You have failed the council." He growled at her.
"I would've been able to make him my mate if you hadn't opened your big mouth to him..." Thiza growled in return. "YOU are the one to blame for this not..." She lowered her head as he raised a hand again. Speaking to a superior blood like that was liable to get her a beating in the town square but she was as angry with him as he was with her.
"Do not blame me for your incompetence! I never said a word to him!" Dougal snarled.
Thiza looked up at him in surprised. "But...but he knew. Somehow he knew I was being paid. He knew that it was you..."
Dougal stared at her hard for a long moment. "Then we have a traitor among us..." His eyes flashed. He rushed to the door to his office and threw it open, looking around the council hall. There were only a few select chippequoti here. Ones who were considered trustworthy and loyal. It wouldn't take long to weed out which one had broken the oath of confidence and betrayed the secrets of the council. He closed the door and turned back to Thiza, speaking in a soft but harsh tones so as not to be overheard. "This is what you'll do. You will go back to him, tell him I took everything from you for betraying me, then tell him you are pregnant."
"I'm not going to lie to him anymore. I care too much about him." That was what had started this mess in the first place. A small insignificant lie, and yet...so significant. Chips valued truth, blood and oaths above all else. To break one was to lose honor in the eyes of the gods and kin. She did not blame Killian at all for being angry, but neither was she willing to give up on their relationship.
Dougal sneered. "Then you won't have to. You are to go to the chippequoti doctor and have her inseminate you so that you can go back to him and not have to speak falsely about being pregnant."
"But you want me to make him think it's his." Thiza looked disgusted. "Another lie...I will not..."
Dougal stepped forward. "Do you wish to reclaim him as your mate or not?"
Thiza looked down.
"If he cares as much about you as you claim he does, he will not leave his current love homeless and pregnant in the snow. He will have no choice but to take you in and that will force him to try and mend things." Dougal's voice became almost tender and he set a hand on her shoulder. "You are a loyal and honest chippequoti. One of the few that the council can rely on to bring the glory and strength of blood back to our people. Continue to trust in the council's wisdom and lean upon the love that you shared with him, even for a short while. He will accept you back if you follow our instructions."
Thiza nodded. She wanted that more than anything.
"Good." He patted her shoulder. "Your home will be destroyed by the week's end and all your possessions burned. I will call Dr. Quill and have her prepare for your arrival."
"As you say..." Thiza bowed her head and left his office.
Dougal followed her to the door and looked around the room. A few faces glanced up at him then returned back to their work. Which one of these low-bloods was the one who had betrayed them?
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Three days later:

It wasn't pleasant being woken up at the break of dawn. But it was even worse when the thing that woke you was an agonized scream that echoed through the colony. Those who weren't drawn out of their bed's by the scream were quickly awoken by guards pounding on their door, ordering them outside. Star hid in the bedroom but peered out the window as people, still in their nightgowns and blankets, came to stand in an awkward circle around the center of the colony.

A chippequoti female, wearing naught but a thin night-gown, was on her knees in the snow, chained to a metal pole stuck in the ground in the middle of the circle. Blood trickled from either sides of her throat, dripping onto the white snow and staining it red. Dougal came stood behind her on a stump so all could see him. "This chippequoti, has broken the oath of confidence, and revealed things which were once secret. In this society, the laws of the Council reign supreme. We value three things above all else. Truth, Oath and Blood. When these are broken, society falls into chaos. As such, we must deal severe punishment to those who break these things. For Sooni's breaking of Oath, her punishment is this: the cutting of her voice so that no oath may be broken again, the cursing of her blood for the oath that was broken and a day on her knees that the gods may forgive her and perhaps one day cleanse the curse. If anyone attempts to aid her, you will be punished as well." He gestures to a guard who brings Thiza forward to the center.

Dougal grabbed her arm tightly enough to cause her to wince and spoke loudly again for all to hear. "Thiza has broken the value of blood, and fought against commands directed to her by her superiors. In this society, the strong protect and look out for the weak and in return, the weak serve the strong; all according to the strength of blood. For her disobedience, all that she owns is being stripped away, and she must start anew." He nodded to a group of guards who poured oil over her home and set it aflame. Thiza winced as the fire burned everything she owned and tears trickled down her cheek. "By serving her superiors, and knowing her place in society, she will once again become strong. Those who resist their superiors will be punished. Those who speak against the laws of the council will be removed. Those who attempt to rebel against society and cause chaos...will, be, executed. But those who fall into place will be rewarded. Those who value peace will enjoy the comfort of being cared for and protected. Together, we will build a society where no one hungers, no one thirsts. Where all are protected and peace reigns supreme."

Dougal stepped off the stump and left, signaling the end of his speech. As everyone began shuffling home, two guards remained stationed next to Sooni to ensure no one tried anything. Thiza shivered in the snow next to the fire that burned her home. She looked around as if lost. Would Killian come for her? Or was he still so angry with her that he would leave her outside in the cold. If he did not come to her...she would go to him. And if he still did not accept her then she would know that he hadn't felt as strongly about her as she thought. In that case she would have to play that horrible card that she had no desire to play. It was a cruel way to force someone to stay with you...but..if it was the only thing that forced him to give her a second chance, then she'd do it. She cared about him too much to not do everything in her power to win him back.
 
Killian followed Star over to the living room. He had Claire tucked under one arm. For the most part the little girl had gotten used to being carried around like that by her father and she squeaked a little. Her legs kicked behind him and she held onto his arm. When he sat down Claire started to gnaw on him like he was a chewing toy or something. Normally Killian didn't say anything unless she bit hard and then he would usually put her down. He was too afraid to actually do anything to her since she was so tiny and one of his hands almost covered half of her body.

Everything Star described was next to torture. Killian couldn't bear to think of her being stuck in a burning capsule that was ejected from a machine. Then having to sell herself just to survive. While she was talking he glanced down at her hands. She was rubbing the tattoo'ed ring and he felt a pang of guilt. Killian moved his hand away and instead pulled her closer to himself while she talked. One arm held Claire and the other held Star. Her talking about the shield only made him grin gently. "Well that's why you should learn everything you can. Never know when it might come in handy. You're back that's what matters." There was still more and he stopped everything even breathing for just a few seconds. She was sick because of a bacteria from all those men. They couldn't have known that she was married unless she told them and he wasn't there to protect her. In a way Killian had wished that he was there with her. He could have saved her from so much if he had been there. Instead he got sick and it was all from mining that stuff. Now that he thought about it, he'd never heard of the mining making anyone sick or even the processing unless it was for poor working conditions.

It had been silent for a few moments and he finally remembered that she said she was sick. Killian noticed a slight tremor and he kissed her on top of the head, it wasn't really a kiss, but the closest he could get for now. "Star I already told you that it's what you had to do. I would rather you came back to me than live in that place or die there." Bringing his hand to her chin he lifted her face. "You told me once that you have to forgive yourself. I've already forgiven you and now you just have to accept that you did what was necessary. It's not always pretty, but it doesn't change my love. That ring I had tattoo'ed on is still the same and it still means the same thing to me." Perhaps it was better if they weren't intimate for a while even though he didn't want that. She probably needed time to heal and so did he. There were a lot of things to sort through. "We can still share a bed if Kato thinks that will be ok."

"You sure you're ready for that?" Star questions. "You just separated from an intimate relationship with her and I know you are still struggling with those feelings."

Killian shifted on the couch. "We need to reconnect. Star she's coming back sometime. Thiza didn't take everything with her and she really did care about me. Its just...I need to give her a better reason than her being paid to do this to start with. If I told her you were here it might change things. She held off once and asked me if we wanted to progress because she didn't want to compete with a dead woman. I was too afraid of losing her to admit that I still wanted you."

Star nodded. "If you think that's the way to get her to back off, then...do what you need to." She holds his hand tightly. "I want to get back to where we were. Even if we can't kiss, I still want to be as close to you as possible."

"I need to tell her. Star even if she doesn't back off she deserves to know the truth." Killian let out a sigh of relief. Now all he needed was for Thiza to come back like she promised. "Lets just start with sharing the bed and talking about things as they come up." For now it seemed to be a reasonable offer.

Star nodded and smiled at him. "Ok. Starting tonight?"

"Yeah." Reaching for her hand he gave it a little squeeze and leaned in to kiss her before he remembered and pulled away again. "This is gonna be hard. We might be weird after this...forget how to kiss and all that." Chuckling a little he raised her hand to his lips and kissed her there instead. "Make me get more creative."


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Killian got up the next morning a little earlier and he returned to the house. She obviously hadn't been back or he would have thought she would be waiting for him and maybe she would have taken her things. If only she would come back. He needed to talk with Thiza. It was tearing him up to have to keep this from her. Even if he was overjoyed to have Star back it hurt to send Thiza off like this and he needed to offer her what he could for a new life. If she would even accept his help to get started again and be an independent woman. This whole thing felt very wrong. To have slept with her and treated her like she was his life and then throwing her out without any kind of explanation besides the fact that she lied.

The lie was big enough that it made it difficult for him to trust her completely. However, he had opened up to her enough that he felt attached to her. Thiza had been his comfort and love during a difficult time. Just to be sure there was time for her to come he stood outside his door for a while and then went back inside. For whatever reason she hadn't come and he finally returned to Star at Kato and Anna's. Maybe tomorrow he would see her. Two days since the break up and he still hadn't seen her. Perhaps he needed to take her stuff to her. Going back to the house he flopped onto the couch with a sigh. "Still hasn't come back to get her stuff." The longer she waited the more difficult it was making things.

No matter how hard he tried not to think about it he caught himself wondering if there was a way to keep both women. Couldn't live in the same household, and then how would you divide the time? What if he had children with Thiza and then how would he deal with things if both women wanted him at the same time? Keeping them on separate planets would be the only way to do it and he doubted that would last long before they figured out what was going on. It was a headache just trying to think of how to deal with Thiza and do the right thing. Was there even a right way to handle this?

He couldn't talk to the women about this. Somehow he had a feeling that they wouldn't even want to know that he thought about keeping both of them. So instead he was going to do what he had to and see how it played out from there. Killian just needed Thiza to come back and get her stuff so he wouldn't have to go to her house.

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The last morning for Thiza to do something about picking her stuff came around. If she didn't get it he would take it to her. He had spent a mostly restless night in bed and Star seemed to be having troubles too. Many times he woke to hear her mumbling or moaning in her sleep. Killian tried to comfort her with a gentle stroke along side her cheek and sometimes it worked. Other times her response was far more drastic than what he had been prepared to encounter. Whatever she had to do obviously bothered her and he leaned over her to grab tissues a few times to hand her a tissue to wipe away the tears.

By the time he was getting some sleep it was the early morning hours. Mornings were usually peaceful and then he heard the scream before it died out in a dreadful warble. This was in part why he usually slept with his pants on. Throwing his legs over the edge of the bed Killian shoved his feet into his boots and laced them up before he reached for a shirt and snatched his vest on the way to the door. On the inside of his vest he always had a gun and at least one knife. Only those that shared his room with him knew that the vest was part of his wardrobe because it hid a small array of weapons that he'd grown accustomed to carrying on his person at all times. A man had begun to beat on their doors and Killian threw it wide open and stared at the fellow guard. He was weaker blooded and he dropped his gaze slightly. It didn't matter if they knew he was spending time with humans these days. "What is it?" Grabbing his coat from a hook he slipped it on and stepped out the door.

Following the man's gaze he saw the two women. One was Sooni and he recalled Star talking about her and this must have been the contact. It was only confirmed when Dougal's voice rang out. Killian's coat was still open in the front and he was glad for that. Then of course the Chippeqouti council member had to spew his jargon and it made Killian sick to his stomach.

A slow rage had been building over the last few days. He watched Star suffer and Thiza was suffering because of this man. Clenching his jaw he waited for them to light the house on fire. Breathing a little heavier he found himself unable to hold back any longer. Taking his coat off he glanced between Thiza and Dougal. He had time if he ran. Charging toward Thiza he threw the coat over her shoulders and pulled her off the ground. Without so much as a word to her he started off running toward the center. The people had all tarried a moment longer waiting to see how this would play out and Killian knew this was his chance to set things right. Anna had already told him of the ways the humans were being mistreated. It was time to end. The best way to do it was to catch the council off guard.

Even Dougal paused with a quizzical expression. The man let emotions rule him far too much. He had raced out toward Thiza like a true mate would and he couldn't help smiling until he noticed that Killian was leaving her just as quickly. This was something that they had not anticipated.

"Dougal!" A near howl sounded and Killian slowed to a powerful stride instead. Seemed that the man was going to stand his ground and that was exactly what Killian was wanting. "I'll tell them all what you did now. He paid Thiza to see me. The shame is not hers, but the council's." It seemed to get a shocked gasp from around the entire village. Killian could feel the fellow guards begin to close in. They couldn't afford for this to come out, but it was too late.

The other Chip turned his head away and started to walk. He didn't need to be here. They could have a small session with Killian later on. Neither was he going to stay and try to answer questions that would be sure to arise.

"You son of a bitch!" Killian turned sharply and hit one guard square in the throat. Even on a chip it could collapse the airway and the guard fell back gasping. Lunging for Dougal he pulled a knife from the inside of his vest. As Dougal turned around Killian shoved the blade into his chest and pulled it out. "I told her I was going to kill you." Staring into the Chip's face he smirked. "Did she forget to tell you that?" Jamming the blade into Dougal again he reached up twisted the neck so violently it tore some of the skin on Dougal's neck. Placing one hand on the hilt of the knife he let go with the other hand and let the council member's body drop to the ground. For the moment even the other guards had froze in shock at what just happened. A small river of blood had formed and it ran through the snow as Dougal's body bled out though he was already dead and his eyes were turned toward the sky. "It is the duty of the strong to protect the weak and the council's corruption needs to be broken now. Who is with me?"
 
Star strode out into the snow, her coat on her back, her eyes sharp and her expression stern. Killian had just issued a challenge and she was going to back it up. She was putting herself in danger doing this...but she could also very well be the thing that rallied the humans and the sympathetic chippequoti. For once, the ferocity of Killian's execution did not bother her in the slightest. She'd spent 10 months in hell because of that chip. There were a few murmurs as people began to recognize her. Lisa gasped and began crying as Star stepped up to the guard Killian had knocked out and took his keys. She unlocked Sooni's chains, while the other guards were stunned. She gave the chippequoti woman a long hug. "Thankyou for what you did...risking yourself for the sake of the humans. We'll repair your voice again. I swear it."
Sooni nodded wearily and stood from the bloodied snow with her help. A fellow chippequoti, emboldened by Star's release of her, came to Sooni's side and guided her to one of the medical ships.
Thiza's eyes widened as Star appeared. Suddenly, it all made sense. Killian's sudden and determined rejection of her. His unreasonable stubbornness. His first mate, the mother of his child had returned. Despite the coat around her and the fire from the burning of her home, she felt cold as her heart was shattered.

Star jumped onto to the stump. "Dougal...the council...they tried to kill me, Killian's mate. They sent me after a cure for him that they already had, and infected my ship with a virus so that me and Dr. Witteck, who treated many of you here, would be trapped when the ship exploded. I barley escaped with my life. The truth...the secret that Sooni revealed...is that the council wants to reinstate their dominance over humans and over the weaker blooded chippequoti. The other secret is that they paid Thiza to lie to him and take my place as his mate, for some twisted plan. They say truth is their highest value, but they lie themselves...and now they'll kill and silence anyone who has been speaking against them. You may have elected Kavis originally and supported his version of a council, but I pray you see now that the council of the chippequoti is no longer acting in the best interests of everyone. The weak serving the strong, is not a peaceful society. It is a dictatorship...its slavery. Humans value freedom above all else...that is what we are fighting for right now. Our freedom and a society of peace. Today, we need to make a stand together to renew the council for equal representation, with leaders who will act honestly and with integrity."
 
Anna heard all the commotion and she pulled her robe on. They were demanding that everyone come out to witness the punishment. So started the beginning of the open tyranny. The council was so sure of themselves. She could only stand by like the rest of them. Glancing back at the house she saw a shadow of Star watching for the time. Sooni was bleeding from the throat and Anna watched with a cool expression. She couldn't afford to be targeted as the messenger that passed it on. If the council was onto Sooni then they weren't far from discovering the other part of the link. Somewhere across the group she thought that she saw Kato's mass of hair though it was hard to tell.

Glancing over at Killian it was difficult to read his expression. His eyes had narrowed slightly and he seemed to be holding back. Was it for Sooni or Thiza? There was no telling what would happen. They needed to wait. This could be weathered for now. It appeared there would be time to start gathering a small group to start an insurrection. After this event she was sure that there would be plenty of opportunity. Everyone would be desperate to get out from under the council's thumb.

The little woman's heart skipped a beat as she saw Killian charge across the snow and throw his coat over Thiza before issuing a challenge to Dougal. Momentarily she closed her eyes and let out a breath. Star had stepped out. It was so rash and it would start a war in the colony. There was nothing she could do about her friend, but she needed to get others mobilized now. Thankfully both Claire and Jacob were still in the house. Please let Kato have enough sense to get out of this while he can. There wasn't time to warn him and he was always so ignorant of these kinds of things. "Quickly get her out of here." Anna grabbed a Chip she had suspected a long time of being a sympathizer. It was one that had been severely mistreated many times. While that Chippeqouti was busy helping Sooni out of the scene Anna did her best to send people home to get weapons or hide with their little ones.

Star would get herself killed standing up there like that. Just as soon as the guards came to their senses it would be over. "Frank get Lisa out of here now!" Pushing on the man she nodded toward the guards that were still shocked. "Move while you can and get the others out. We'll need anything that could be used as a weapon." No one had any real weapons since that had been one of the council's little deals when they took over. Anna warned as many as she could and had them pass the news on before she started back to her own house. She needed to hide the babies. If the guards went crazy she suspected that they wouldn't stop even if there were children. Especially not Claire being a half blood. The child was viewed as an abomination.

As she headed back for the house a bullet broke one of the window out and she ducked. It was starting and there was no telling if anyone would come back to fight. If they didn't it would prove to the council that they had complete control. This isn't what she would have done, but Killian made a choice that now was going to affect them all.

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The guards began to come out of the shock and they raised their guns. One of them pointed his weapon at Star and some of the others began to try and round up the people. Killian turned in time to hear a gun go off and he saw a human crumple. "Star get down!" With three running strides and a leap he jumped up and grabbed her with one arm in a tackle fashion. Curling his arm in he tucked her next to his chest and he hit the ground on his side with Star still safely tucked against his torso.

A familiar sound of bullets hitting the ground and digging into surround structures filled Killian's ears. His eyes instantly went wild. He had to get Star out. Rolling to almost lay on top of her he barely held himself an inch above her body. "Crawl till we reach that little dip in the ground and wait there." The grade was enough that she shouldn't be an easy target. At least not as easy as she was here. His body covered hers except when Star's arm or leg would stick out as she crawled. Killian glanced to the side to see a guard closing in. "When I move you go as fast as you can for shelter." Putting his mouth near her ear he spoke to her as loud as he dared. Pushing away with one arm he rolled off Star and toward the guard.

Killian sprung up and wrenched the gun from the man's hand. Jerking it up and to the side he hit the man in the chin with the butt of the weapon. Another shot sounded. Taking the weapon from the man he shot him and turned to start shooting the other guards as they tried to close around him.
 
Kato raced after the chippequoti woman helping Sooni. She was taking her to a med-ship but no doctor would be there waiting this time of morning. Except him. He reached the ramp of the ship just as Sooni collapsed inside. As he feared, whomever had cut her vocal cords hadn't taken into account the nearby veins and and the possible damage to her airways. With the help of the other chippequoti woman he got Sooni onto a table and immediately went to work saving her life, trying to ignore the sounds of gunshots in the background. As much as he feared for his family this chip was going to die without him.
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Star froze as she saw the guard turn the gun on her, then Killian suddenly tackled her into the snow. He got her to a ditch, pushing her down before grabbing a gun and shooting at the guards. Her heart pounded. She hadn't expected it to turn violent this quickly, nor had she even thought that the council would take such drastic measures so fast. She wanted to cry as she saw fellow human colonists falling under the hail of bullets. And then some of the chippequoti began fighting back against their kin, tired of the oppression of the high bloods against them. She couldn't just let them fight on their own. Not after she had inspired them to rise up. Star crawled forward and grabbed a gun from one of the guards Killian had dropped. She took aim, shooting at Chips that were aiming for humans. Only a few shots in though before her hands began to tremble to much to aim properly, and she was forced to sit and watch the bloody massacre.

The entire fight took about 15 minutes. By the time the last shot sounded, the snow was steaming with red hot blood, bodies of humans and Chips both scattered across the snow. Star couldn't even count how many had been killed or injured. There was no telling who had won this battle, and who had lost. Slowly, the non-combatants peeked from their houses to help with the injured. Humans for humans and Chips for chips. It didn't matter which side, anyone still breathing was taken to the medical ships where there was only one chip doctor, one refugee doctor, Kato and a handful of nurses to deal with the aftermath.

Star heaved into the snow, trembling from the cold and the adrenaline as she wept. It wasn't right...all these people they'd helped save from the nobles only to have them killed by some extremist chips whom they'd live side by side with for over a year. It wasn't right. And then, the crying started around the colony. Husbands weeping over wives, wives weeping over husbands. Friends crying for their friends and children crying for their parents. So many dead, and injured. She prayed this was the end, but it may very well have been just the beginning.
 
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