The Vampire's Apprentice

He opened his mouth to snap at her but found he just did not have the heart. He pulled up one knee and rested his arm on it. "No, Kitty, I am not. I am not 'okay,' and I suspect I shall not be for some time. You should sleep."
 
"It's a bit hard to sleep with large objects being thrown across the room." Attempted humor; generally how she made light of a serious conversation when she lacked something else to say. Kitty figured it might not have been the moment for that, but it was the only thing she could think of.
 
"Mmm. I suppose you are correct," Clancy murmured. "It will not be happening again." What would be happening next would be cleaning up the thrown furniture.
 
The girl wavered for a moment, not sure wether to leave or to stay. She was worried for him, but perhaps he was also hurt and needed time to simmer. Kitty wanted to go upstairs and hide again, leave him alone for the moment to calm.... Maybe that was best. There were no werewolves inside....

Why hadn't she disappeared, then?
 
Clancy waited for her to leave, but she didn't. The girl was still standing on the stairs watching him with a pinched expression. Sam sat at the top of the stairs, waiting to see what was to happen next. Stupid, loyal dog. Clancy looked up at Kitty on the staircase, and his heart constricted again. "I am tired of fighting," he admitted softly, "but I do not want to walk away. As much as you hate me for it, I am right, and I only wanted to help you. Yet you fight so hard that I am hurting you trying to help you. And I am tired."
 
She stood there for a moment longer, gazing at the chaos of the room, the brokenness of his expression. Kitty stretched out a bare foot to step onto and climb over the couch, using the wall and stair railing as balance. She made her way over to him and sat down, keeping at least a little distance between them, carefully examining her toes as they stretched out in front of her. She didn't say a word the entire time.
 
Clancy sat in silence with her, in no rush to continue. Finally, he spoke in a soft, almost gentle voice. "I know you think me cold and callous and are suspicious of my ulterior motives, and I cannot say I blame you. I would be doing the same in your place. However... why cannot a motive... why cannot it be a genuine desire to help?" He sighed softly. "I have not allowed myself a friend in a long time. Not to be melodramatic, though my kind are known for it, but I have refrained for the pain it causes both parties. I believe what I have felt... with you... it has been worth it..." He stopped, his eyes on the far wall. He did not want to continue putting into words what he felt. It had been a long, long time since he had even attempted something like this, and it was like wading into unfamiliar waters.
 
Kitty nodded. Her gaze didn't leave her feet but for a moment, to look down at her fingertips. Was she wrong? Had she heard differently?

"I have hurt you." A whispering, cracked voice answered his. Kitty paused, but it did not sound any better when she continued. "It was never meant to go this far. You were meant to leave me be and I was meant to continue to forget what happened... only you kept bringing it up, and I never understood–⁠" She swallowed when her voice gave out. "Am I that important to you?"
 
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Clancy finally looked at her, his gaze sad and tired. "You are Mine," he said softly. "My human, my familiar... and I thought and hoped... my friend." He looked down. "I had not meant friendship, but a part of me longed for it. A part I am used to ignoring and forgetting, myself. Seeing you in pain... I cannot handle it."

He could not admit to her what he could not admit to himself: he loved her. Not in a romantic sense, but in a deep, tender way that would have done anything for her. Anything but let her destroy herself. Better open rebuke than hidden love, and the wounds of a friend were good, but the kisses of an enemy...
 
There was no reply. Kitty didn't look up, nor did she brush her hair behind her ears again when it fell into her face. Her shoulders shook silently, but she did not answer. How could she? The girl could barely see her toes through blurred vision.
 
Clancy heard the soft change in her breathing and saw the shaking in his peripheral vision. Still without looking, he reached out with one arm and gathered her to him in a hug.
 
There was a moment⁠–⁠only a moment⁠–⁠when she thought to push him away. She was perfectly fine. Words Kitty had echoed to herself many times in the past, but his gentle grasp, tugging her closer, it was something that made her reconsider. Was she really OK? To be sitting here, leaning against him as she cried; was she truly alright if he tried so hard to make her see something she clearly did not want to? Was that what OK people did?
 
Clancy felt her relax and pulled her close in a firm but gentle hug. "I am sorry I hurt you," he whispered. "I just... I know you don't believe me, but I understand your pain and I was trying to help you. Seeing you hurting... even just knowing it... I am sorry. But I just wanted to help you and did not know how, so I tried to bring in someone I thought would know."
 
She buried her face into his shirt, content not to exist, just for a minute. The soft fabric smelled clean, like he did. Calm and upkept, organized, familiar; not at all like the state of the living room or the chaos in her mind. Why couldn't she listen?
 
Clancy gave her a minute, waiting to see if she said anything. When she didn't, he just held her closer and rested his cheek on her head. He was here for her. It was something he had almost forgotten how to do, a skill that had never been truly honed in this manner, but he understood loyalty. He had once been loyal to family and to a gang. Now he would be loyal to her. If he could do nothing else, he could do that. Be there for her no matter what.
 
"I forgive you," was the mumbled answer from somewhere hidden in his clothing, a while later after she pulled herself together again. Even if he was cold to the touch, it was better than being alone. Kitty revealed her face to brush at it with the back of her hand, then snuggled back into her hiding spot. There were so many things she had to say, but she was never sure how to say them, so she continued to not.
 
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"Thank you," Clancy whispered. He hesitated a long moment before speaking slowly and with great caution. "Perhaps you could tell me..." What did he want her to tell him? Everything, really, but how to phrase it. "Why do you resist help so much?" he finally decided on, trying to stay gentle, ready to drop it if she started getting upset again.
 
"Because...." Kitty replied quietly. She never finished the thought—or perhaps that was the end of her sentence? The girl didn't feel like answering his nudges, either way. There was already enough to deal with.
 
"Alright," Clancy said softly. He risked one last question, and he knew it was a risk, but softly he asked, "If I went with you and talked to the therapist, would you feel more comfortable? If you saw how she handled my issues? I could do that, if you would like. But... I will not require you to go anymore."
 
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